Note to famous Scientologists: When you talk about other Scientologists, we don’t believe you. We know you have an agenda to seem as normal as possible, to make up for the aliens and niacin and such.
And so, it is with ease that I call bullstuff on Jenna Elfman‘s recent comments on her Scientologist brethren Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. "Honestly, they’re happy. They have a great life and they love each other. For some reason, the media cannot experience that. They must put in things other than the simplicity of it." These "things" include gossip like Tom ordering Katie to mommy school, Tom stalking Katie as she works, Tom’s general tyranny over the relationship, and mass speculation that the entire relationship is a sham (those pesky gay rumors!).
But anyway, as far as Jenna’s words go: Lies!
What civilized celeb comments on a relationship that has nothing to do with
them? What dignified public figure isn’t decent enough to say, "Oh, that’s none of my business
since I’m neither Tom Cruise or Katie Holmes? I could see how you might confuse me with Tom, although I’m about two feet taller than he is." I’ll tell you who can’t do this: a Scientologist with an agenda.
Of course the media manipulates things and attempts to make non-stories into scandals with simple conjecture. But little that the media has reported about TomKat has been as far-out as Jenna’s depiction of their relationship:
"It’s hard to give a detailed explanation on something that’s simple. Honestly, do any of you have a great boyfriend or girlfriend? It’s not a big deal, right? You have fun hanging out, and you like talking and sharing your ideas. It’s exciting. That’s their relationship."
Again: Lies! What grown person has a relationship that’s simple? Relationships, especially when children are involved, are complicated as hell. Factor in media scrutiny and relationships can be hell, period. I’m not buying Jenna’s Stepford retelling of the Tom and Katie story because it’s unspecific and so trite. It’s like the outline of a terrible, terrible script, which makes sense coming from someone whose major accomplishment was a nails-on-chalkboard sitcom.
Or it could be Jenna just doesn’t know TomKat well enough to have any grasp on their relationship. Either way, SHUT UP, JENNA ELFMAN. [People]