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30 Rock: Last Night’s Best Lines

office_recap_e1.jpgSeen what’s going on in the last few weeks of 30 Rock? Jenna’s weight ballooned because her Broadway role demanded she eat pizza every day. Jack had heart attack that he’s trying to keep secret for corporate advancement reasons. Gay West-Coast careerist Devon Banks hit town to marry the boss’s daughter. Tracy’s wife dumped him because he’s stone-ass crazy. Loveless Liz bought a wedding dress out of unfounded optimism.

Every week we’ll choose four or five jewels from the latest episode. Do let us know if you’re planning on buying a “Me Want Food” t-shirt.

Liz: What kind of diet is going to do that?
Jenna: It’s the Japanese Porn Star diet. I can only eat paper, but I can eat all the paper I want.

Jack: Banks - what are you doing in town? Drawn to the phallic nature of our skyline?

Tracy: Angie and I said things that can’t be taken back. She called my vanity license plate “inscrutable.” ICU81MI - hilarious!


Doctor Leo Spaceman: Now Jenna, medically speaking, given your height your current weight puts you in what we call “the disgusting range.” But there are answers. For example: crystal meth has been shown to be very effective. How important is tooth retention to you?

Jack: We all have our secrets. Banks is pretending to be straight, I have my heart episode under wraps, and Allen Garkle in legal? I don’t think he really needs that wheelchair.

Jenna: It’s kind of hard to take life advice from a single woman who’s using her treadmill for her hanging her wedding dress, and who’s wearing a one piece swim suit instead of underware.
Liz: I have to do laundry.

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