Though he’s got Gates and Clinton on speed dial and his songs are incorporated into Catholic masses, Bono may have found the one group he hasn’t won over, yet — North Dakota legislators.

Recently, Fargo state Rep. Scot Kelsh submitted a bill to honor the U2 frontman for his work in raising awareness on poverty, debt relief, and eyewear. The resolution was defeated by a shockingly close vote of 58-35, meaning that approximately a quarter of the state’s population has forgiven the band for Pop.

After the bill’s defeat Republican representative Gil Herpel expressed his confusion at the bill, stating that he had previously thought it was to honor Sonny Bono, of Sono and Cher fame.

"When I saw the resolution, I was looking for Cher’s name in there," Herbel told Yahoo! News.

Chris Cornell will be yelping and shrieking on his own for a while. Audioslave’s front man has slipped out the back door, leaving his band mates to fend for themselves – which they’ll be doing quite nicely as they reunite with <i>their</i> old front man Zack de la Rocha in a Rage Against the Machine show at the Coachella Festival in April. In parallel news we’re still reeling from the David Lee Roth/Van Halen confluence. Who’d a thunk that the failed talk show host would ever make amends with his hard rock buds? Maybe this means that Sammy Hagar could audition for Audioslave? Or maybe not. Something tells me the Cabo Wabo routine wouldn’t sit right with Tom Morello’s leftist leanings.

[Watch Cornell do his solo thing.]

[See pics of this year’s Coachella artists.]

Tags: Music

[Instead of posting on Britney Spears everyday, we save the news for a weekly omnibus post. Because a train wreck looks so much more glorious with some perspective.]

They tried to make her go to rehab and finally she said yes, yes, yes. As of now, details on Brit’s just-announced rehabilitation stint are scant, but the same can’t be said on the rest of her week. The gory ins-and-outs include allegations of car-vomiting. She showed a rare flash of good judgment when she ditched a hideous red dress she showed up at Club One to party in, but all that was in vain when she changed into an even more hideous multi-colored bikini. Her past caught up with itself when exes Justin Timberlake and Kevin Federline bumped into each other at a Grammy Awards party, and then it caught up with her when former assistant Felicia Culotta dished dirt to a fan site. In Culotta’s letter, she lamented the way Britney’s "life is unfolding," refused to be an "enabler" and then compared herself to a dog ("You can just kick an old Dog so many times before he gets off the porch. I, FELICIA, am OFF the porch!!"). If you really want to get at Britney, FELICIA, try comparing her to the dog next time. Unlike Felicia, Rabbi Shmuley Boteach offered some advice for Britney: "Soon your boys will be surfing the Internet. They’ll see a lot of photos of you in poses that no son should ever see their own mother…Try and be home with your kids…Cover up…Limit the visits to the nightclubs." Any other week, I’d be all, "Rabbi, please," but for a crazy, fleeting second it seemed like she was ready to follow the sage advice. And then we found out that she actually said no, no, no to rehab after she got there and everything made sense once again.

Tags: Britney Spears

And she loves it! Apparently, Cindy Lou Who, the Star-Belly Sneetches and  Foo-Foo the Snoo had the day off.

A few more shots of Scarlett being shown around Boston by these effervescent gentlemen while in town to accept Harvard’s Hasty Pudding Woman of the Year Award:

Tags: Scarlett Johansson

The trailer for Penelope (due in theaters April 6) has hit the ‘Net, but you’re likely to come away disappointed after watching it. The movie is a sort of grown-up fairy tale about its titular character (played by Christina Ricci), a girl born with the face of a pig who’s on a quest for societal acceptance. It looks charming and Burton-esque (think Edwina Piggynose), but there’s a catch: we only see Penelope from behind or with her face covered.

Not allowing us to see the prosthetic nose is clearly an attempt to drum up curiosity. But then attending the film becomes a risk on the part of the potential ticket-buyers. What if her pig nose looks totally wack? What if it’s all a ruse and it isn’t a pig nose at all? If I detect prosthesis, I’m totally asking for my money back.

[Penelope on Yahoo! Movies]

Tags: Christina Ricci

[Wait for It is our daily roundup of things to look forward to in pop culture. Yay future!]

TV

One thing that you don’t see enough is Parker Posey, but all of that could change. The indie-flick queen has been drafted to topline the Fox pilot Jezebel. Parker’s set to play a children’s book editor who finds out that she can’t have children and then asks her younger sister to be her surrogate. Zany! Creator and executive producer Amy Sherman-Palladino (The Gilmore Girls) says she "can’t believe" they nabbed Parker for the role. It is pretty amazing for an under-appreciated talent like Parker to be involved with such a project. On her less-than-gushing work flow, Parker herself told New York last summer, "I might as well be starting my career now, as far as Hollywood’s concerned." Hopefully, Jezebel will be blessed with beginner’s luck.

[Hollywood Reporter/Yahoo!]

Music

It may be another excuse to drum up some posthumous profits, but it’s easy to put your cynicism aside for this one: Notorious B.I.G. is finally being immortalized with his first Greatest Hits package, due March 6, just three days before the 10th anniversary of Biggie’s death. The 17-track set will include two previously unreleased songs ("Running Your Mouth" and "Want That Old Thing Back"), as well as the elusive single remix of "One More Chance," and the Junior M.A.F.I.A. classic that his first verse drove, "Get Money." That’s enough to wash away the foul taste of the money-grubbing Duets: The Final Chapter for good. At the very least, it should tide us over until the inevitable A New Beginning.

Full tracklist: "Juicy," "Big Poppa," "Hypnotize," "One More Chance (Remix)," "Get Money," "Warning," "Dead Wrong," "Who Shot Ya," "Ten Crack Commandments," "Notorious Thugs," "Notorious B.I.G.," "Nasty Girl," "Unbelievable," "Niggaz Bleed," "Running Your Mouth," "Want That Old Thing Back," "F***in’ You Tonite"