Pete & Ashlee Get Engaged, Register for Eyeliner
Think they’re celebrating at the Simpson home in Texas? 23-year old Ashlee Simpson is engaged to her sensitive rocker dreamboat, Pete Wentz of Fall Out Boy. Yes, that noise you hear is the shattering of 12-year old hearts around the world. Ashlee announced their good news on Pete’s website late last night with this message:
“We know there has been a lot of speculation recently about Pete and I and we wanted our fans to be the first to know, because you guys are the best. Yes, we are thrilled to share that we are happily engaged. Thank you for all of your support and well wishes - it means the world to us. We consider this to be a very private matter, but we wanted you to hear it straight from us.”
The singers are, however, remaining tight-lipped about the rumor that Ashlee is pregnant with a fall out baby, which possibly spurred the speedy engagement. Whatevs - can’t a famous couple just simply be in luv? All engagement presents of eyeliner and black nail polish can be sent directly to the happy pair. Mazel tov!






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Blonde in a Boat
There was a blonde driving down the road one day. She glanced to her right and noticed another blonde sitting in a nearby field, rowing a boat with no water in sight.
The blonde angrily pulled her car over and yelled at the rowing blonde, “What do you think you’re doing? It’s things like this that give us blondes a bad name. If I could swim, I’d come out there and kick your butt!”