Tila Tequila’s Team Gobbles Pig Vaginas
Here’s a list of the top five most awesomely bad moments of episode 3 of A Shot at Love With Tila Tequila 2.
1. CHAD CAN’T FETCH A BALL
For the second year in a row, Tila Tequila split her wooers by sex and made the two groups face off in a “bi-athalon.” Among the athletic challenges, contestants were forced to dip their heads into an inflatable pool and use their mouths to pick up balls with symbols corresponding to their sex. Chad should have had an advantage in this exercise of fetching, considering that he has the brain power and disposition of a dog. But he couldn’t find the correct ball and began to bite the side of the pool out of frustration. In the meantime, the girls ate away at the boys’ lead and then won the challenge. Chad claimed later that the “snot rockets” floating in the pool prevented him from completing the task. But we’re talking about a guy whose idea of fun is to raise his legs over his head in bed and pass gas. Chad could probably bath in snot without being phased. Could it be that he doesn’t know the difference between a male and female symbol?
2. TILA TEQUILA IS A NAUGHTY SCHOOL TEACHER
We all know that Tila looks great in a bikini and that she knows her way around a stripper pole. But who could have guessed that she would raise the bar in the worn-out “naughty teacher” genre of sex fantasies. This is the only moment in last night’s show that wasn’t awesomely bad, but just plain awesome. After the girls won the bi-athalon, Tila proved that no one makes a hotter teacher than she. It was as if every lesbian in her classroom had reverted to the 8th grade, their hormone-riddled minds bombarded with thoughts of Tila throwing off her reading glasses, unpinning her hair, unzipping her business skirt, and unleashing her stripper-esque cleavage on them in one-on-one sessions after school.
3. THE ULTIMATE PANTY RAID
Being sore losers of the bi-athalon (not to mention having the mentality of puppy dogs and grade schoolers), the boys decided to go on the “ultimate panty raid” while the girls were being schooled in Tila’s classroom. This makes the list of awesomely bad moments only in that the girls’ reaction to it was awesomely stupid and hysterical.
“You don’t do that to a girl,” said Lisa.
“I could not be more livid!” exclaimed V.
“Your mother’s a ho,” screamed Kristy to Jay. “I will kick [your] ass.”
What!? Tila forced these girls to strip off their clothes and simulate sex in a cage and yet a panty raid is what sets them off? Please.
4. SAMANTHA’S “GLITTER” WASHED AWAY BY TEARS
Samantha, nicknamed “Glitter” because she pastes the substance onto her eyelids, displayed a fit of weeping never-before-seen on reality television. Her hunched over frame heaved and shook. The ground underneath her became drenched in tears and she appeared to hyperventilate. The cause? The “meanness” in the house was “unbearable” and “overwhelming.” Having to fight in Iraq or having your village flattened by a tropical cyclone would feel overwhelming and unbearable. But a bit of screaming between a bunch of hormone-fueled boys and girls who are competing for one sex kitten named Tila Tequila? Again, please.
5. TILA FORCES HER SEX CAPTIVES TO EAT PIG VAGINAS
Last season’s feast on bull penis was sickening. But this season’s equivalent challenge was even worse. It started by Tila splitting up the boys and girls and making them compete to see which group could drink the most shots of unidentified noxious concoctions like mustard and canola oil. This resulted in a puking fest that was utterly revolting to watch. The women, of course, won the challenge, and were “rewarded” with a breakout competition to see who could eat a pig’s vagina the fastest. (Lisa, the butchiest of the bunch, gobbled up the vagina the fastest and won alone time with Tila.) Is this A Shot at Love With Tila Tequila or Fear Factor? What’s next? Is Tila going to make them have sex with each other in a den filled with snakes? Now that would be television! Stay tuned.
Tags: A Shot at Love With Tila Tequila, MTV, Photos, Television, Tila Nguyen, Tila Tequila
May 7th, 2008 at 4:48 pm
I was just reading this chick’s blog and it mentioned Tila. It was pretty hilarious. You should totally check it out!
www.lisagopman.blogspot.com
May 7th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
[…] year in a row, Tila Tequila split her wooers by sex and made the two groups face off in a ???bihttp://blog.vh1.com/2008-05-07/tila-tequila-forces-sex-captives-to-eat-pig-vaginas-and-other-awesome…East St. Louis shines in girls conference meet St. Clair County JournalTo nobody’s surprise, East […]
May 7th, 2008 at 7:45 pm
It’s so funny. I often watch some funny videos and photos on I n t i m a t e m i n g l e DOT C o M It said that there are some hot star such as Britney’s photoes and videos there.
May 7th, 2008 at 7:48 pm
NO what was gross is this:
HER freaking *!~^^@ When she was at the “prom” she had on this short red dress and was taking pictures with each one of the guys. This one guy picked her up and her dress came up. She was not wearing underwear and you saw it all. It was quick, but you saw her black pubic hair and all.
Shie is one clazzy lady. LOL
May 7th, 2008 at 9:32 pm
Tila is definitely Hott!! I would definitely love to go on the show and win her heart. I would bet everything that I love that I could.
see me here http://youtube.com/watch?v=WFka8-pk6rQ
Can someone help me find the love of my life?
you can also see me @ www.myspace.com/myspacecelebrity001
May 7th, 2008 at 11:14 pm
[…] I might go as far as eating balut, but probably not a pig’s &%$~$`
May 8th, 2008 at 7:58 am
she is degrading the asian community with this ridiculous show,,,,
thank you and have a nice day…..
i know asians and they have much more respect and dignity then this tila whoever or wherever she came from
May 8th, 2008 at 11:33 am
THAT SH*T IS STUPID. I WOULDVE BEEN LIKE WHY N THE HELL WOULD U WANT ALL OF US TO EAT THIS FOR U, U F-ING SKANK. SORRY BOUT THAT BUT WHO DO THESE PEOPLE ON THE DATING SHOWS THINK THEY R??? I KNOW ITS A GAME AND IM SURE MONEY IS INVOLVED BUT COME ON!!!
May 8th, 2008 at 11:47 am
People will do the dumbest things to be on TV.
May 8th, 2008 at 2:59 pm
[…] http://blog.vh1.com/2008-05-07/tila-tequila-forces-sex-captives-to-eat-pig-vaginas-and-other-awesome…We all know that Tila looks great in a bikini and that she knows her way around a stripper pole. But who could have guessed that she would raise the bar in the worn-out “naughty teacher” genre of sex fantasies. … […]
May 8th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
lOOK AT THIS BIG PIG (!)#
May 8th, 2008 at 3:44 pm
Man, THAT’s SICK!!!!!
May 8th, 2008 at 3:50 pm
it’s funny that these people are so desperate to show their admiration for someone who obviously couldnt care less about them. If someone tried to make me eat a pig _#)#+% i would next their *`~ quick.
May 8th, 2008 at 3:55 pm
ALLL THIS FOR THIS WORE DOWN SKANK WHAT A BUNCH OF TWATS
May 8th, 2008 at 4:06 pm
[…] year in a row, Tila Tequila split her wooers by sex and made the two groups face off in a ???bihttp://blog.vh1.com/2008-05-07/tila-tequila-forces-sex-captives-to-eat-pig-vaginas-and-other-awesome…Even the platypus’s DNA is unusual San Jose Mercury NewsWASHINGTON - When the British naturalist […]
May 8th, 2008 at 5:10 pm
that is so nasty how could you eat that?????????????
May 8th, 2008 at 5:44 pm
The grossest thing is that after all that puking and the eating of pig vajay-jay’s she still wants to suck face with them. This show is sooo degrading. After the last show I swore I wouldn’t watch it again, because Tila’s so fake, but I can’t help it. It’s like watching a train wreck.
I also think the producers are setting her up to choose a girl this time. The guys here are all immature losers! And what’s up with Glitter? She is naggingly annoying!
May 9th, 2008 at 8:08 am
OMG, she looks so hot. It seems that girl is dating online now. I saw her profile on dating site “W e a l t h y lo v I n g . c o m” last week. It is said she is dating young billionaire on that site.
May 9th, 2008 at 6:54 pm
This is the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen. Pig’s @(%$*+ vh1 should be ashamed of itself.
May 9th, 2008 at 8:40 pm
All i have is 3 things to ask and 3 things only,how could u guys (and girls)do that kind of stuff?,can u still taste it ,and if u can’t taste it anymore,how did u get rid of the smell and the taste?
May 9th, 2008 at 8:52 pm
How,and why a pig’s v$@#$%,i mean how in the world did Tila Tequila get thoses pig’s v#$%^@ and man that was just plan disgusting Tila!!!!!!! And i really fell bad 4 the people who actually had to eat that s@#* man!!!! Well,no i don’t because i’m glad that wasn’t me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
May 10th, 2008 at 9:38 pm
If these people are dumb enough to do this for her, well then they deserve it, and anyone else who would disrespect themselves for her laughter.
I love you Tila, but not for the same reason as every other swinging d!ck, but for the same reasons that I love Bill O’rielly. You help me identify the rejects in the world that watch your show, you let them feel safe to show how backward, worthless, and waste of air they are before I actually have to waste my time to find that out. I thank you for this, people like you are a real blessing (not really) and when you fall to drugs, get fat, get into a bad accident, turn 30, or just simply become yesterday’s news, there will be another bimbo who is just as worthless as yourself, ready to take your glory and pass on the stupidity :D.
God bless you (yeah right) and have a nice day (along with herpes).