Cruise-bots Ready to Ruin Big Apple
Let me be the first to say “NO THANK YOU” to the news that Katie Holmes and her master Tom Cruise will be moving to New York City so that Katie can star in the Broadway play All My Sons. Surely she’s convinced this will make her a “serious actress” - something Mad Money came so close to accomplishing, natch - but what the Cruises don’t really get is that their presence will make our fair city seriously suck. Our city is already packed with crazies stomping around in Burberry trenches and giant sunglasses. And spoiled toddlers? Yeah, we’ve got those too. Unless Tom can use his super powers to ensure that every NYC resident can easily get a cab at 5PM on a Wednesday, we’ve got no use for him here. Bah! [People]
May 20th, 2008 at 10:54 am
[...] Jim Rentz wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerpt [...]
May 20th, 2008 at 12:49 pm
Hey, absolute2, you fool!!!!! Katie too, huh??? Tom’s gonna kick your *%! you f_cking liar!!!!
May 20th, 2008 at 2:15 pm
Don’t worry, this Move is probably only a temporary one!
May 20th, 2008 at 4:58 pm
Super Martian and his Stepford wife and their cute little E.T. can go anywhere their spaceship takes them. HA! I would advise Martian Man and Stepford Momma to stop giving little E.T. that DAMN BOTTLE. She’s 30yrs. old JEEZ! See Martians age more rapidly than humans, so 2yrs.old equals 30yrs.old. Planetary Invasion, Cruise Control, and Land on the NYC! It won’t be the first time Aliens wanted to take over.