Why Are All These Hollywood Chicks So Fat?

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Heaven help us. All our favorite hotties in Hollywood are getting super fat for roles! How dare they? Megan Fox, for example, has revealed that she gained a whooping ten pounds for Transformers. She said,

“I should have toned up for ‘Transformers’ but I’m really lazy. I had to put on weight. I’d lost a lot of weight and got really scrawny, but I was told I had to put on size for ‘Transformers’ because Michael [Bay, the director] doesn’t like skinny girls.”

Now she eats “red velvet cake” and has dinner late at night in order to pack on the pounds. And it sure is working! Just look at that slender waist and tight butt – they’re massive! Another fattie freaking everyone out is Eva Longoria. The tabloids were spazzing recently because she’s been packing on a pound or two, and has turned into a big ol’ beast. But there’s a reason! According to People, “She’s making herself look like that as her character has let herself go.” And it shows! She looks like she swallowed a golf ball – or two. Disgusting! The only starlet not getting enormous these days is Kim Kardashian (see below!), whose boyfriend Reggie Bush is pressuring her to lose some weight, and even forced her to do beach-side hill sprints. Doesn’t he know those extra pounds are now in?

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