I Love Money Reunion: What You Didn’t See

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Because there’s only so much time in any given broadcast, tons of reality gold never ends up making it to air. Because we were on set during the taping of the I Love Money reunion, we got to see everything that went down and can let you in on some of the finer moments that you didn’t get to see. From a whole segment devoted to Rodeo full of tears, name-calling, barbecue sauce and awesomeness to extremely off-color jokes from Mr. Boston to bottle-throwing from Heather, we’ve got the scoop. In the words of Heather: everyone’s getting exposed, motherf***ers!

- Rodeo’s segment was epic, maybe my favorite reunion segment I’ve ever witnessed (and I’ve been to every reunion taping since Flavor of Love 2, with the exception of I Love New York 2, regrettably since that was the best one of all time). It is a crying/hyena-howling shame that we didn’t get to see any of it (although there is an amazing segment in the video extras). Rodeo acknowledged her weight gain before breaking into tears. When Craig asked her why she said, “I came here to win this f***ing thing.” From then on, the emotions and curses flew. “The only person up there I think is a fake is goddamn Megan.” Rodeo called out Megan’s tendency to manipulate men with her sexuality, leading to this amazing back-and-forth with Brandi C.:

Brandi (from the audience): You took your top off for attention!
Rodeo: I did not.
Brandi: I was there!
Rodeo: F*** you.

Rodeo went on to describe her visit to the Walter Reed Army Medical Center, of course, and during this, she caught Megan snickering. “Megan, you can smile all you want, you bitch!” she yelled. The melodrama was so high, it was like watching a live soap opera. And I haven’t even mentioned my favorite thing that she said, which pertained not to her cast mates but to her product and where she sees it going: “Beef wraps dippin’ in my barbecue sauce.” Yeah. You’re sorry you missed it, right?

- The little back-and-forth between Brandi C., and Mr. Boston that made it to air was just a taste of the true nastiness unleashed during his segment. “I’d rather have my decency than start doing porno, ya f***ing whore,” he yelled to her. Even more hostile were his comments directed at 12 Pack regarding his supposed affair with Megan (as alluded to during Heather’s segment): “If he’s banging Megan, I don’t want to come down with AIDS.” Yeah, that’s right, Mr. Boston made a gay/AIDS joke, as if he’d be lucky enough to catch a social disease. I think airborne illness avoids Mr. Boston for fear of being annoyed. Anyway, the whole thing wasn’t a tenth as endearing as Boston clearly thought it was.

- The Entertainer’s segment went much as you saw, and in fact, in this case editing really did enhance the experience. The only notable thing that you didn’t see happened when Destiney was called up to the stage and they discussed their relationship for an appropriately brief amount of time. Apparently, things fell apart when the Entertainer commented on Destiney’s showing during the episode of Rock of Love 2, in which everyone watched a Poison concert. Apparently, Frank called her and said she looked like an idiot (which…uh…yeah), but the day he decided to tell her this also happened to be the day of her father’s funeral. They hadn’t spoken since. He claimed he called her an idiot in the most good-natured way possible, she conceded that she was particularly sensitive that day, and that was that. No kissing and making up — a few words ended it all. Apparently, their love wasn’t built on the strongest of foundations. You’re shocked, right?

- Megan’s segment was infinitely more chaotic than what you saw and anything else that happened that day, for that matter. Apparently, Brandi was supposed to be called up to the stage and everything, but the segment was cut short mostly thanks to Pumkin’s out-of-control display. Speaking of Brandi, early on in Megan’s segment during some heckling from the cast, Brandi spoke up and defended Megan. Heather shot back with, “She talks s*** about you, too!” Brandi protested, “We’re a team!” She became so frustrated over Megan’s treatment (and possibly from her inability to join what was happening on stage) that she got up out of her seat and sat on the edge of the platform that the cast was sitting on (I think there was a stray shot of this at some point during what made it to air). Brandi spent the rest of the show sharing her seat with Megan and Lily, like one big crowded family.

- It was sort of hard to parse out, so here’s some insight into Heather’s rage: she decided to believe a rumor that was being passed around that 12 Pack and Megan had recently slept together. Since she had more recently slept with 12 Pack (between the bleeps you can hear her say, “I f***ed you two days ago!” during her on-stage rant), she apparently feared for her health, reasoning that he must have caught something from Megan. This vexed her so much that she not only freaked out and “exposed” him on stage, but during the post-Megan-segment chaos, she threw a plastic bottle at him when back in her seat. For a second, it all seemed like it was going to devolve into more Rock of Love 2-esque shenanigans, but I guess it didn’t hurt him or he didn’t care (12 Pack, unlike so many people on these shows, is unflappable). After a brief cool-down, Heather was her less-ragey self. Everyone’s craniums sighed in relief.

- The Chance and Real segment was much longer, thanks to the brothers’ general toomfoolery. At one point, Chance referred to Craig as “Craigory.” Additionally, in reference to his scarf, Chance informed Craig, “This is my whip. I just had to turn it into fabric form.” Butch! And of course, totally silly. But it was a knowing sort of silliness. Earlier, someone from the audience yelled to Chance, “Chance, smile baby.” He shot back, “Why? You trying to expose my gap?” Chance’s sense of humor about himself is boundless. Seriously.

- Megan’s belief that she was I Love Money‘s star was only reinforced by the studio audience: you can’t tell on TV since the applause has been more or less normalized, but she got the biggest cheers during the introductions. Then, when Craig informally polled the crowd on its favorite, Megan’s name was the overwhelming response. Once again, Megan proves herself to be the winningest loser of this game.

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