The Celebreality Interview - Lil’ Hood

Lil’ Hood has something to say…about everything! From her portrayal as a “ghetto thug wannabe groupie” to the curse of her Long Island accent to her connection with Ray to her claims of him being spoiled to her experience living with cancer (!). Add in a few proclamations of, “We’re not here to make friends,” and the interview below is practically an embarrassment of riches.

How was your time on the show?

I don’t regret going on the show at all, but I do get a little frustrated with the fact that they tried to make me look like I’m some type of ghetto thug wannabe groupie. I’m not like that at all. I’m a little Barbie girl with a f***ed up accent I can’t get rid of because my family’s from New York. It sucks because Ray named me Lil’ Hood and that stuck with me. I don’t think my rapping helped any.

Yeah, what was up with that?

I had planned to sing the song Ray J had done with 2 Pistols, and I was told they couldn’t clear that song. They asked if I had something of my own I could sing. I figured I’d sing the chorus to this song I was working on with my boys called “Grindin’.” Right before I was going to perform, I was told I had 10 minutes to fill so I had no other choice but to spit the rap as well. I figured whatever, maybe he’ll get a laugh out of it.

So in other words, that “hit ‘em where they sit” line isn’t something you’d normally sing in the song?

No, that’s my boy Red’s part. I told Ray J that, too. We got a chance to sit down and talk about it on several occasions, I gave him the lyrics and everything, but that wasn’t on the show.

You also did say on the plane that the ghetto popped out of you on the plane.

The pilot was joking around, acting like he was going to land, but instead he’d pick up speed and then do these crazy tricks. Ray was like, “You’re not gonna be Lil’ Hood anymore! You’re gonna be just ‘Lil.’” And I was like, “The ghetto just popped right out of me!” It was a joke.

Where do you think the characterization came from?

The way that I speak, I think. That’s why my friends started calling me “Ghetto Barbie.” I have the accent of a New Yorker. My family is from Long Island. I’ve gone to speech classes and everything. It’s just a crappy accent I can’t get rid of. But I had a feeling that I wasn’t going to really be portrayed as myself. I pissed off the wrong people. When you make the star of the show mad on his own show, you have to expect that you’re not going to turn out looking like such a good person.

It all seemed to start to go awry at the winery date.

First of all, the CD that you saw me give to Ray was not a demo. I don’t have a demo. I tried to give it to him off-camera. I just wanted him to have it. He told me to give it to him on the date. I was upset when I saw that episode because of that and what had happened on the date.

Yeah, it seemed that you were way more into him than he was to you. He said he gave you a “sympathy peck.”

I laughed my ass of when I saw that. You can’t help but laugh. It really was good television, even if I look like an idiot in most of the parts. It really was funny. I think if you took out parts that showed me doing stupid things, some of the entertainment value of the show would have been taken away. I’m a goofball. I can make people laugh, even if it means looking stupid. I’m glad people can at least take that away from it. As far as the kiss goes, we kissed! I didn’t force myself on him. He was tasting grapes from the vines and that’s when the kiss happened.

When did you get the sense that you weren’t connecting with him?

I had a bit of an inkling after that date.

When he said you were sure of yourself in the limo?

After elimination and Caviar had gone home. He and Danger were all over each other that night. She was with him the entire night and all the girls felt insecure about that. I started to realize that I just wasn’t the girl that he was looking for.

At the bar, though, it seemed like you were really pushing up on him.

Ray picked me up. There’s no way in hell I would have been able to get on him like that without his help. He was bouncing me up and down and then he said, “You have a little fan club going on down there, we can’t have any of that. We gotta stop it.”

But you also said that you wanted to go to the bathroom with him without the cameras.

I didn’t say that at that particular point. But it was a joke in the house that the bathrooms were the one place without cameras. There was a rumor around the house that he and Danger were constantly in there. That was the quiet, secret zone. It became a joke in the house that every girl would say, “Let’s go into the bathroom with no cameras or anything.”

You definitely seemed in better spirits during the date than in the car, though. What caused the change?

Danger told me, “Ray’s just not that into you. I don’t know why you’re here.” That was the turning point. He was all over so many of the other girls and I did feel like I had to try extra hard because I’m not the type to do splits or little dances to grab his attention. And since I was riding with Danger and Cocktail, the two girls who were closest to him, I figured that if they were saying it, it must be true. He had been talking at the club all night to Danger. The next day, I told him that I was really feeling him, but I was not into the situation. He told me that he’d heard that I said I wanted to eliminate myself and I admitted it was true, but the reason that I felt that way was because of what Danger said. He told me that when girls said things like that, I needed to come to him and tell him that. He told me to be his eyes and ears, but I told him that I’m not that kind of person and if I were, I’d be coming to him every five seconds with a different he-said-she-said story. For example, a conversation was had between some of the girls in which they told me I was stupid for looking for real love on the show, that no one else was there for that. So when you see me talking to Ray when I was in the towel, that’s what I was telling him. I told him, “Even though we’re not here to make friends…” and he said, “So you’re basically saying, ‘F*** you!’ to everyone in the room right now.” That’s when I told him not to twist my words. I was saying, “We’re here for you. We’re not here to make friends.” I got the feeling that Ray wanted me to say, “F*** you! F*** you!” to all the girls. And that’s when I really realized I wasn’t the girl for him and I packed my stuff. Cocktail was nice at the time, and she wrote me a letter on MySpace last night about how she didn’t really set me up and how she cared for me. It is what it is, it’s over.

During your final conversation with Ray, you told him he was spoiled.

I was furious at him for getting mad at me for doing what I told him to do. I didn’t want things to end badly like that. I still kind of feel bad.

Do you feel like he’s spoiled?

I do. There was one night when we were in the hot tub and he got really upset because no one was waiting there for him with a towel. We were all soaking wet from being in the hot tub and he asked which one of us was going to get him a towel. We confronted him about that and he apologized. But that’s what he’s used to. I’m sure I’d be that way if I grew up with people handing me everything all my life.

Do you have any hard feelings or resentment for him?

In all honesty, I’m not sure how I feel about him. He knows who I am. I have ovarian cancer and endometriosis. Ray even offered to help me find medical help because I don’t have insurance. We had a relationship. Whether it was as lovers or friends, it was hard to tell because of all the other girls and cameras, but we did have a good relationship. Ray really knows me. For him to say it’s OK to portray me as the hood rat that throws herself at someone, how can he live with himself knowing the truth? If he didn’t have any input on that, I don’t have hard feelings for him. If he did, I do.

So, are you going to be OK? What’s your prognosis?

I take medicine everyday. I’ve had five surgeries already. I was diagnosed at 16. They were talking about taking out my left ovary. I had just gotten out of the hospital when I flew to L.A., to do the show. They found that the cancer is back and what they think they can do is have me in for a round of treatments once a month. It’s medicine through an I.V. It kills all the bacteria and it keeps the endometrial from growing and attaching to other organs. It’s been tough, but I want to keep a positive outlook. I need to because I want to keep doing the modeling and the stuff I was doing before I went on the show. It’s life, I can’t take it too hard or else I’ll go crazy.

Keep up with Lil’ Hood via her MySpace.

Related content
For the Love of Ray J show page
For the Love of Ray J videos and extras

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 4th, 2009 at 6:50 pm