What has the girls abuzz?
Why, it’s a buzzer, of course. Duh. And it’s also the subject of our first superlative:
Most Likely To Be Used as a Sex Toy –
Just to reiterate: it’s the buzzer, not Steve (although, you could do much worse in either case). The immediate joke came from Arian, who asked, “Where are you gonna put that?” when Steve told the girls he’d be buzzing them whenever they messed up on their dates. It was so obvious that Taylor reiterated it when she came back in the house (she was still at the hospital during this dating challenge…thing).
When notified of the challenge, Taylor asked, “Did you slide it over your vajayjay?” What was previously implied was made explicit, thanks to Taylor. And that is why we love her.
Second Most Likely To Be Used as a Sex Toy –
Most Likely To Hide the Can Opener – Jody
When the episode opened and Taylor had just left the house because she was feeling sick or whatever, Jody seemed particularly glad. She made it clear that she wouldn’t be hanging around feeding Taylor chicken soup upon her homecoming.
Least Likley to Launch a Career as This Decade’s Answer To Susan Powter – Jessa
Before she could work out, Jessa got all worked up. She argued with Stasha about Stasha’s prescribed “boot camp,” saying that she might throw up after an intense workout. She also cried when she found out they’d be working out as part of a challenge. “You don’t understand, like, I can’t do anything,” she moaned. Heed the words of infomercial master Tony Little: you can do it!
Most Likely To Lift Up her Band-Aid To Give You A Good Look at Her Scabs – Arian
She’s been hurt so she has trust issues and she tends to push guys away after dating them for two weeks…that’s if she hasn’t already pushed them away by airing her dirty laundry within minutes of meeting them, as she did here, in a discussion with her trainer.
Most Likely To Be At One With Drafts – Stasha
Defending her right to bare breasts, Stasha explained that she comes from a long line of nudists: “My parents are nudists and so is my aunts and uncles and everybody that I know.” You wonder how it took this long for her to make it on reality TV.
Least Likely To Be Friends, Part 2 - Stasha
“You don’t have to be my friend after this journey,” she interviewed on naysayers like Jody who weren’t so into the boobs-out thing. Again, you wonder how it took this long for her to make it on reality TV.
Most Likely to Stay Holed up on the Weekend - Jessa
She outed herself has a Halo enthusiast. Luckily, that was a major score for her date, who’s also into the video game…
Staying holed up is fine as long as you’re doing it with someone! For her confidence, Jessa also gets the distinction of being this week’s Most Improved. We’d give it to Abiola but she seems pretty much on her way to relationship perfection anyway.
Most Likley To Say “No, No, No” to Rehab – Taylor
Just call her “Amy Whine-house.”
Most Likely To Renege on the Whole Tough Love Thing - Steve
“Give me a hug,” he told Jody after meeting with her about her relationship problems. That seems more like love-love than tough love, but whatever. He’s the expert.