New York Goes To Work Recap – Episode 2 – Pig And A Poke

|

Just when you thought it was safe to turn on the television, now even New York’s talking about swine flu:

nygtw_2_gif1

Not sure if this counts as resurrection or a nail in its coffin. Could go either way, really.

The people have voted and…

nygtw_2_5

…they picked “fast-food restaurant cashier.” Good job, people! Kidding, despite how it sounds, the Pork Palace isn’t a joint, but a farm:

nygtw_2_2

And you know, after reading Gene Baur‘s Farm Sanctuary, all I can say is THANK GOD they didn’t ship New York to some factory farm, lest this be less jokey reality and more Faces of Deathly. Yay for pigmanship!

nygtw_2_1

And look at how happy New York is to be there:

nygtw_2_3

New York meets with Randy the ostensible king of Pork Palace, who’ll dole out New York’s five tasks:

nygtw_2_4

She meets with “swine expert” Infro, the “master goat keeper” Siro and Randy’s son, who clearly has it out for New York:

nygtw_2_6

As New York prepares for her first crappy job and looks for a place to put her bag, she takes the pigmen to task for their lifestyle, deeming it “unsanitary and disgusting.” Well, speaking of lifestyles and sanitation:

ilny_7_27

Bam!

New York’s first job is to clean up a pig pen, which means shoveling manure. She accepts this task with the grace we’ve come to expect from her:

nygtw_2_8

nygtw_2_9

At one point, a fly buzzes around her. New York uses this as an opportunity to stop what she’s doing and whine about it. When Randy approaches her to assist her, she asks him, “Is there a fly in my ear?” Look lady, whatever the weave’s covering is your business.

New York finally makes a crappy attempt at shoveling crap:

nygtw_2_11

It may be fitting, but it’s still a fail:

nygtw_2_12

Before we get to the next task, let’s check in with Infro to see his assessment of New York’s output:

nygtw_2_13

Infro is easily swayed.

This next task requires Newy to transport a pig from its pen to…I don’t know, somewhere that it doesn’t end up going by New York’s hand. As she starts this task, a mere look from a pig provokes a flight of fancy.

nygtw_2_14

Randy interviews that New York is “incredibly skittish.” I’m really overwhelmed by Randy’s insight. Next he’ll deliver some wild bombshell like New York’s boobs aren’t real.

New York finally gets down to business and the first matter of that is waking a napping pig. New York pokes said pig with a stick…

nygtw_2_15

The pig rouses and New York takes off. She hops at one point and wails, “I don’t want to die!” at another.

nygtw_2_16

nygtw_2_17

I don’t know why she’s protecting her genitalia. Is she that narcissistic to think that everyone, be they human or porcine, wants her?

Also, for some reason I found this little snatch of footage hilarious:

nygtw_2_gif2

She’s, like, grieving.

She’s supposed to direct this now wayward pig with a board, but Infro ends up doing all the work. Well, he isn’t a swine expert for nothing.

nygtw_2_18

Thus, more failure:

nygtw_2_19

The next task is led by Bryan, whom New York bribes with half of the prize money if she doesn’t have to shovel the feed. Bryan isn’t having it.

nygtw_2_20

This ends up being something that New York is capable of. What a rare thing!

nygtw_2_21

nygtw_2_22

Next, New York is introduced to Randy’s mother who has prepared this:

nygtw_2_23

New York takes a look at this totally crisped out pig, blesses herself and cries, “God rest his soul!”

nygtw_2_24

Well, that’s arbitrary. You’d think she’d like them better dead, seeing as she can’t so much as be 20 feet away from a live one without busting a seizure. The task here is to cut the pig up and serve it to the family. New York wonders, “If you guys don’t cut him, do you think he can come back to life?” Is she just making stuff up at this point, or what? That tops the time a dolphin swam up to her and she asked, “Is it alive?” You’d think that someone whose mouth has repeatedly put her in harm’s way would understand the basics of organic life as we know it on Earth. Oh, that New York, so full of surprises.

She is SHOCKINGLY uncomfortable with this task as well:

nygtw_2_26

She reports that the skin is crunchy, as though that’s an accident. She should take Ricki Lake’s lead and help produce a documentary on the hazards of over-tanning.

She ends up serving everyone and offers her own homemade side:

nygtw_2_27

Contempt. She calls this family “creepy bastards” after witnessing their bone-sucking and finger-licking. She may be mean, but she isn’t necessarily wrong.

The penultimate task involves cutting a goat’s nails.

nygtw_2_28

But Newy, of course, ends up running away during the process and thus fails.

nygtw_2_29

She also left the barn open, which means all the goats got out:

nygtw_2_30

And that, in turn, has created another task for her to fail at:

nygtw_2_gif3

nygtw_2_31

She may be a clown, but she’s no Rodeo.

New York eventually gets the goat on the rope:

nygtw_2_32

She doesn’t comment on how plus-size this particular goat looks (seriously, is it pregnant?), which is kind of a let-down, actually. Finally, it would have been deserving!

The final task involves inseminating a pig. Given her tool, New York makes a face struck by many when presented a phallus:

nygtw_2_33

And if that’s too subtle for you…

nygtw_2_34

There you go.

New York informs us that she’s been trying to find “lovin’ like that” for two seasons. I knew she liked them long, but I had no idea she was into thin. Interesting. Anyway, this ends up being the task that New York does with the most ease. I’m not surprised — she’s kind of in her element.

nygtw_2_35

I mean, she moans, of course.

nygtw_2_36

But it doesn’t really get in the way of her job, for once.

nygtw_2_37

Randy tells her to calm the pig with words. “Take it like a woman,” says New York. I’m guessing this is based on experience. Aw, she’s so sensitive.

nygtw_2_38

Anyway, the time comes for New York to be evaluated. She pleads her case by saying that her hair, makeup and clothes — the thing she cares about — suffered as a result of this job. Very smart to bring to the table topics that these men will surely relate to.

nygtw_2_39

The panel weighs in. Infro says New York was “bad,” running away all the time. But he comes around because, “I know you’re beautiful.” He says yes. Ciro tells New York that she needs “to more learn.” “When you chasing the goat, you had beautiful boobs,” he enthuses. And to think that he wouldn’t have been treated to that had she not screwed up and left the barn door open! Ciro says yes. New York gives her admirers a little something more that they can feel…or think about when they get a second alone.

nygtw_2_40

Bryan says that every job she had was terrible and she took forever. He says no. “Screw you, Bryan,” Newy says plainly. Yeah, Bryan’s a little too real for reality TV.

And because of that, Randy doesn’t listen to him and presents New York with the check.

nygtw_2_41

Even though she completed half the tasks and complained about all of them, New York gets the check. Well, you know what they say about money: easy come, easy come. No wait, they don’t say that. But at least now New York can.

Related content
New York Goes to Work show page
New York Goes to Work videos and extras

  1. xBenji65 says:

    The name of the show should be “Money for Nothing”

  2. JUST SAYING says:

    hate the show !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. Cynthia257 says:

    The show is sooo stupid. Whats the point of it, she does wrong and she still gets the check. No good.

  4. BlackHeart says:

    This show’s pretty bad.

  5. Cancel this show please says:

    What a stupid pointless show.

  6. chelsea says:

    love it. watching new york interact with animals is one of the greatest gifts vh1 has ever given me.

  7. Mark says:

    FYI: Those goats look like that because they have four-chambered stomachs, like sheep and cows, except they are not covered with wool or tall enough so their big stomachs stand out.

  8. Eluded says:

    This show and girl are a joke. I agree with previous about a horrible show. I bet tons of other people could actually use the money, why don’t you do this with the homeless???? Oh because you’re morons and like to waste money in a bad economy on some stupid idiot.

  9. Yvone says:

    I might, just might understand if she gave half of the bonus money to charity, but to get $10,000 for not really doing anything but act like a moron, and not even doing a good job at that, is insane.

    51 Minds should be ashamed of themselves for coming up with a show like this and putting NY in it and VH1 even more ashamed for putting it on the air.

    I would rather see Frank The Entertainer do this show.

  10. luv it says:

    those who r leaving bad commants probly are mad they couldnt get the chance to do nothing for money. i love the show and will continue to watch it till no jobs are left. i think newyorks crazy and outthere personality is what makes the show if she just did everything like normal it would be boring. so neyyork you have my aproval u r beatiful and talented.

  11. Babycakes says:

    I don’t think she deserves those ten thousand dollar checks. If u want to throw away ten grand then at lease use the money for a good cause. Not for that greedy, selfish Tranny.

  12. nobody says:

    These jobs are fail proof and are all rigged. She should be doing a real show like dirty jobs, and I know she wouldn’t last 30 mins.The checks look fake, so the show must be doing the check thing to get ratings. VH1 isn’t that stupid to have a greedy, money hungry, gold digger on the show making that much money when they could have regular joe citizens doing thses jobs, especially when the ones who are jobless would be than happy to make a little extra pocket money. GET THIS CHICK OFF THE SHOW AND PUT SOMEONE ONE THE SHOW WORTH WATCHING!!!!!!!!!

  13. Nobody says:

    I was in a hurry so some of that doesn’t make sense, but you get the point!

  14. tigga says:

    i dont like her at all, she has no class what so ever. New york aka tiffany needs to stop the madness. do u really need money that bad to look like an @@&@$@)))~%)(@@ all over again !

  15. Rodney says:

    I totally agree with you Cynthia257, this show is stupid and it’s funny in some way. Although, she a few things wrong and she still gets a check. That’s not good at all.

  16. oumou says:

    Hi it’s oumou I feel bad that you didn’t get that 10,000 dollar NewYork Ihope you get the 10,ooo dollars next time

  17. lil_bit says:

    i have to say the producers in hollywood are running out of ideas if they think handing over fake checks to a fake boob tv sl*t. she has already had how many shows? too many to count and she is still without a man and an acting gig. she is an overdramatic annoying waste of thirty minutes television show.
    the only way to watch her show is to hit the mute and watch her make a fool of herself because that is all she knows how to do :)

  18. Drea says:

    This show is so freaking horrible i dont care who you are why would you give a stupid #))`$~_`^($_*“ #~&#@)%~)^&*)_(%+# money for nothing? Seriously think people there are people out there that actually need the money not some dumb ^^!~`&&#^~(~_)@%+ Stupid show seriously freaking hate it.

  19. austinsgal22 says:

    I can’t even believe that this show is real!! With the economy the way it is, are you seriously paying this stupid, talentless bimbo to do jobs that normal people do to make life possible for the rest of us and you pay her 10,000 for one day worth of terrible work!! that is a slap in the face to the people she is working for, here she does #^`^`~^$$)!*#)$# ty job for one day, and gets $10,000; and the people actually doing the work everyday, don’t get that much! that is ridiculous i will not support the ratings on this show, and hope that nobody else will either!!!

  20. kendra says:

    i think u are full of @(&^)^@$$+“#~)$ because i think that anyone can complete that simple $~#(_%~@__)+#_# tackes. (and then for 100,000)the show should be called new york half steps in her work and stel gits money.

  21. Donna says:

    New York,
    The more I watch the more of a fan I become. You are very funny and I enjoy watching your shows… Keep up the good work!

  22. tanesha says:

    DAM WHEN ARE YALL GOING TO CANCEL THIS BS. I RATHER WATCH NOTHING THEN WATCH THIS BS.THIS GOT 2 BE THE WORSE SHOW ON TELEVISION PERIOD.

  23. KILL THIS SHOW says:

    OMG why!! Cancel this crap now!!

  24. lashawnda says:

    thats nasty why yal played new york but i mean i dont like her but thats still wrong ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

  25. Wes says:

    I think this shows soooo funny! New York has finesse that other people just…don’t. I think she’s hilarious and the jobs she’s been put it are ridiculous, so people who keep leaving mean comments just need to chill out. It’s not like you HAVE to watch it so don’t ruin it for the rest of us. I <333 New York!!

  26. brianna woods says:

    hi new york this is brianna a.k.a princessb on deck i luv ur show.that that i lyk is when u were a gosht huter and that lil gurl jackie was laughing at u.iam only in the 6th grade and i luv ur show gurl so keep up the good work new york

  27. Gil says:

    Any show with New York in it is not worth the time to watch. I am bewildered that reality t.v cannot find anyone else to give their fifteen minutes of fame to. Please find another cash cow to milk because this one has been dry for sometime now.