Who do you think is the happiest person in this picture?
My money’s on Jay.
All it took was one week, and he’s seemingly at ease with his sexuality!
I want to start out of order since I feel as though I’ve been addressed (you know, kind of, barely, not really). My first favorite thing about this week’s show:
- Bobby’s Internet comment.
“I just do not want to see this s*** anywhere on the Internet,” said Bobby, regarding Jay’s birthday party, which found everyone dressing (and acting!) more outlandishly than usual.
Well, surprise, Bobby!
You’re on the Internet! Don’t worry, more people saw you dressed like this on TV. By the end of the week, you will have entered millions and millions of homes in this attire strictly via the airwaves. Reassuring, right?
And while we’re on the subject of that party:
- Tanisha’s pole dance.
I love that she chalked her failure up to stripper poles not being made for people of her size. Um, I’m pretty sure stripper poles come in one-size-fits-all. They aren’t G-strings. It’s not the pole, it’s you. On the up side, this is nothing that can’t be fixed with a little practice. Just ask…
Kaycee’s bustin’ out and the 5th grade dance will never be the same again! I love that Jay’s baton is suspended in disbelief. And here she initially tried to tell us she was too shy to do this.
He continues to entertain. First, there was his comment on Harvey…
“I must be a masochist or something, but when he yells at me, I like it!” Kinky. Now, since you’re on VH1, tell us all about your love of feet, Bas!
Then, there was his reaction to Tanisha’s hysterical reaction in the POW escape challenge. To her sobbing, “I couldn’t save Kevin!”…
“It’s a TV show.” I love levity, especially when it’s accompanied by entirely shifty eyeballs.
But I’m getting ahead of myself. Regarding that challenge I loved:
- Dogs as competitors.
If Harvey’s snarling isn’t enough for you, surely theirs was. Unfortunately, their bark was about as bad as it got:
When they were set free during the final leg of the race against time (in which each team had a minute to get up a rope ladder), they came with muzzles in tow. Aw, no fun! What good is a possibly venomous dog without an outlet for his venom?
Still, the whole thing was worth it for Tanisha’s reaction for the announcement of said dogs:
Reality TV makes people so good at reality TV! I see why some never want to leave. They’re perfecting a craft, people.
- A Blue Team victory at last!
They’re overweight underdogs. Their entire situation has a lovely ring to it.
- Pouring out a little liquor.
It’s really great to see Bobby make an effort to win the battle with (at least some of) his personal demons. “If I got vodka around, you know, when I’m off, I will drink it,” he told us. And even though I’ve been plenty entertained by the results of Bobby Brown + vodka in the past, I’m still rooting for the guy. Way to go, Bobby. Now all that’s left to dispose of is the rationalization re: beer.
Speaking of drinking…
- Jay’s concern over Nicole’s wine consumption.
Part of him pestering her about it must have to do with his worry about their team’s standing. But mostly what’s awesome is how aghast he is at the fact that she’s drinking something so caloric on camera. “Don’t you know where you are? Do you not see the cameras pointed at you? If you’re willing to drink five beers, drink wine, what the f*** are you doing when you’re not here?” he interviewed. No matter what, do not mistake this with a health issue. After raking Nicole over the coals/grapes, he promptly popped in a cancer stick…
…and the conversation was over.
- Nicole’s video journal.
I don’t know, there was something about watching her flip off her friend who was filming her eat a sub-Fit Club diet that was kind of mind-expanding.
Nicole generally seems so well behaved, that it was nice to see this human side of her. Looks like Tanisha isn’t the only bad girl up in the Fit Club!
- The results.
Shar hit her goal of losing 3 lbs. for the week.
Tanisha did not — she lost none of the 5 lbs. she was supposed to. Ian reminded her again that she’s “almost half fat.” She didn’t hit him upside the head. Looks like one bad girl is learning restraint!
Kevin lost all 4 lbs. he was assigned, and reported: “I can see everything below my belly button.” Sounds like a one-man party to me!
Jay beat his weekly goal of 4 lbs. to lose 7 lbs. Again: being on reality TV makes you really good at being on reality TV! I would love for him to win this thing just like he did Project Runway. He could join Hoopz (winner of Flavor of Love and I Love Money) in the echelon of straight-A reality stars.
Nicole didn’t hit her goal of 3 lbs. for the week — she lost only one. “I only got to work out once,” she said. Extending your middle finger barely counts as a workout, Nicole!
Kaycee lost 3 lbs., just one off from the 4 she was assigned.
Sebastian didn’t hit is goal of 4 lbs. either. He lost 2.
And finally, Bobby lost only 1 lb. for the second week in a row (his goal was 3). He needs to make every little step slightly bigger if he’s going to make any progress.
Here’s how the teams’ points shaped up this week:
Factor in the challenge points, and you get:
While the Red Team has been the clear favorite for the past two weeks, they’re now being creamed by the Blue. (Lite creamed, I mean.) Crazy that the tables have turned so much. That rarely happens on this show, especially so early. Dare I call this season of Fit Club exciting, in addition to entertaining, and, of course, pop-culture boner inducing? I think I just might…