And Now, A Word From Susan

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susansusan
susansusan

Yesterday, I answered my phone to hear Frank the Entertainer shouting over a din of commotion that I immediately recognized as a stream of ranting from his mother, Susan. “Can we please set up an interview? My mom is really upset over Dana’s interview,” he asked, and so, what probably should have happened a while ago finally did: I spoke with Susan Maresca about her son’s show and she was just as outspoken and hilarious as she is on screen. Below, Susan responds to Dana’s claims about the other girls and Frank. She has choice words for Dana’s infamous mother Donna, too (sample quote: “Her mother looks like she could use a good bath. And a good hair-washing. She was a horror.”) Grab your popcorn, ’cause this means war!

I didn’t really ask Susan a first question, she just kind of unleashed:

Dana and her mother were such phonies it was unbelievable. First of all, the first day Dana came into that house, she walked in and her first words to me were, “I love your family, and I want to be in a family like this because my parents are in an open marriage.” I couldn’t believe that she said that. Dana proceeded to be boring on the whole show. She walked around like a stripper, and that was the only thing that was interesting about her for TV. As far as her mother goes, her mother is a crazy person. Well, maybe she’s not so crazy. The mother was doing this to get on TV and I wasn’t going to play into it and fight with this woman. I’m sure she had seen me or at least heard about what happened on I Love New York, when there was a fight between Michelle and me. For the longest time, I never knew that Dana and her mother were making these phone calls back and fourth. Had I been privy to that as it was going on, I probably would have tried to stop it immediately. I saw those phone calls on the VH1 website, and they were the phoniest calls I’ve ever heard in my life. It was acting, and it was poor acting at that. It really was horrible.

So you don’t think her mother is actually as aggressive as she comes off?

Definitely not. She would have to be in a mental hospital if that was really her. And they turned it on and off, too. She comes walking in the house, and she’s screaming and yelling at the door, and I said to myself, “I’m not going to give this one any more airtime than she should get.” She shouldn’t have gotten any airtime, but I decided if I fought with her, than that would give her plenty of airtime. They’re out to get their own show, mother and daughter. Dana practically admitted it in the interview. What was her name, anyway?

Donna.

Donna. After Frank talked to her it was a complete different Donna. Donna comes in like a meek little lamb, and believe me she was after my son. Want to know why I think Dana was there? I think Dana’s mother put her up to going on the show so Dana’s mother could have my son. She said she had a younger boyfriend and everything. I don’t know what age, I thought he said a 19 year old boyfriend, but I can’t swear to that. Her mother looks like she could use a good bath. And a good hair-washing. She was a horror. They think they’re two beauties, and unfortunately, the public likes to see people like that. They love to see people that are rude and crass and they love people like them. They love low lives. The daughter talking about the girls? Those girls on that show, honestly, they were one nicer than the other. They really were.

I’ve talked to most of them at this point, and I concur.

The only one I didn’t like was Mandy. I really didn’t like her. That wasn’t an act, I just couldn’t take her. Maybe she was a nice girl, too, I don’t know. I didn’t really give myself a chance to get to know her because she was too much like the other girls that my son has brought home that I couldn’t stand. But the other girls were lovely girls, every one of them. Even Dana, I didn’t think she was bad until I read this interview. I didn’t think she was the brightest bulb, to be honest with you. She came and she told me that she was going to law school. I didn’t believe that. Look, until the episode with Annie’s performance, you barley even knew Dana was there. And I guess her mother must have said, “You better step it up or you’re not getting your own show.” Because it’s obvious that she went there to get her own show. Dana went there to get my son for her mom, and a show for the two of them. My son was on three other shows, I’m not saying that there’s anything wrong with wanting your own show, but that’s not the way to do it. You don’t go giving interviews and talking about all these girls and the nonsense in that interview, I mean really! Come on, who gives a s*** about her vagina? And all the girls were after her? Please! If I was a lesbian, I’d go straight after seeing her and her mother. I mean, come on!

It was crazy, but the blogger in me was delighted.

Oh, I know you were, but I’m telling you I was shaking when I read that interview. The way she talked about those girls, she should be ashamed of herself, she really should, because she was very friendly with all of them. She had nothing to do with my son getting rid of anyone. Who the hell is she bulls***ting, that he got rid of Renee because she talked him into it? And she didn’t get rid of Melody, believe me! And then talking about my son! Talking about the size of his wallet and the size of his private parts, I mean come on. She’s ridiculous. She wasn’t even close enough to him to know what the size of his private parts are. She said disgusting, terrible things. She’s a fool. And if she and her mother get a show because of the way she’s talking now, I will never ever watch VH1 again. I’m not kidding. I won’t even watch another reality show and I’m a reality TV junkie! That would show that they’re fools that get low class people to put on TV. I thought they were trying to get away from that with Frank’s show. And by the way, you can also quote me by saying that Newburg, NY is not the place that she makes it sound like it is. Newburg is not the ghetto. It’s a suburb. There are bad parts, but everywhere has bad parts.

You’ve experienced both Dana and New York firsthand – do you think the comparison is apt?

If she really was like Tiffany Pollard, why didn’t they project that the whole show? Why did it happen on the last two shows? Come on, please. That was a phony attitude to get their own show, and if people are stupid enough to want to see people like them, low-class white trash, on a TV show, that’s fine, but I won’t be watching.

I don’t know, Susan, Frank seemed pretty into Donna.

For the record, my son does like older women, he has a history with them, that is true, but not someone that looks like that, dresses like that and — please quote me — acts like that. My son was not interested in her in the least. She’s an old bag, which I am too, but I’m not coming on to any young kids. She’s an old bag that’s trying to be young once again and make herself feel good, but no young guy in his right mind would look at her. That’s the bottom line. And whatever my son did on that show – and he did to kiss ass a little bit – was to keep her from going ballistic. He was not interested in her, and that I have to get across. Believe me, she was interested in him and I believe that with all my heart and soul. And that’s the end of the interview, Rich.

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