Indeed, Bobby. Sadly, this probably won’t be the last time, either.
The first thing we loved this week?
- The Crucible challenge involved a metal detector.
It was like Grandpa came down from heaven and resumed searching for worthless and near-worthless coins all over again. Memories!
- Tanisha’s complaining finally was justified.
On the way to camp during the Crucible challenge, she fell to the ground and stayed there (her team didn’t so much as exert the neck-muscle strength to turn around and see her struggle). At first, it seemed like more of Tanisha being Tanisha, which is probably part of the reason why her team was so unconcerned. But then, it turned out that a medical professional corroborated her story:
Her pain was real and so was the ambulance they took her away in. Also real was the treatment:
While the meds probably didn’t make all this worth it, per se (it really sucks that she’s going to miss out on the re-running of the Punisher in next week’s finale), they probably did their share to help.
- Nicole’s fighting spirit.
Not only was this scene littered with her F-bombs, but so was the scene in which Harvey woke everyone up at 3 am to clean up their makeshift camps and make their way back to base camp. When the Red Team made it back with lighting speed, only to find that they didn’t have their tent, they met the Blue Team on their way back and Nicole told Kaycee (who was carrying their tent), “Surrender the tent. F*** you!”
For the record, Red Team won both of these challenges. The F-bombs could really be their secret. They may run on F-fuel. That’s just a guess, though.
(No props to Kaycee for snitching about the latter F-bomb during panel.)
- Alcohol altruism.
After the Crucible challenge, the celebs found themselves at camp with nothing to do, so Sebastian did everyone a huge favor and hauled ass back to base camp for some party enhancements.
That turned the frowns upside down right quick.
You know what it also turned upside down? Bobby’s stomach.
As they went through an animal-impersonating boot camp, Bobby dribble-puked and then…
…projectile puked. “You puked more this morning than a shipload of marines in the Philippines coming off of Liberty,” Harvey later told him at panel. Bobby tried to shrug it away by saying they all had a glass. When it was clear that Harvey was not having that, Bobby elaborated: “When I say glass, I mean a bottle. That is glass.” He always was a master wordsmith, that Bobby. Too hot to handle, too cold to hold, indeed.
- The aforementioned animal-invoking challenge.
The celebs were made to crawl like alligators, slither like snakes and do something we didn’t see called monkey f***. Best of all was the cockroach move…
It was like an unofficial direct-to-TV sequel to Mimic. Perfectly appropriate in every way!
- Kevin’s dramatic transformation.
I know that they’re going to do side-to-side comparisons next week to show you just how much weight these celebs have lost, but K-Fed’s change per his first interview in this week’s show was striking:
On the left is a shot from Episode 1. On the right is a shot from this episode. If he became a boombox before our eyes, I wouldn’t be more amazed at this transforming powers. Truly amazing. Also: yay! Kevin Federline is hot again!
- The results.
Tanisha’s goal for the week was 5 lbs. – she lost 3.
Shar’s goal was 3 lbs. – she lost 2.
Kevin’s goal was 4 lbs. – he lost 6 lbs!
Bobby’s goal was 4 lbs. – he lost 2 lbs.
Sebastian’s goal was 4 lbs. – he lost all 4!
Nicole’s goal was 2 lbs. – she lost none.
Kaycee’s goal was 4 lbs. – she lost 5!
Jay’s goal was 4 lbs. – he lost 6.
That’s more weight this week than his whole team combined. It’s no surprise, then, that Red has lost its grip on the lead:
(Best reaction shot ever, y/y?)
But what may be a surprise, given his phenomenal success, is that Jay still isn’t leading in personal Fit Factor points…
Upon hearing this news, Jay wondered aloud what he’d have to do to succeed at this game. Then he announced that he’s getting a colonic. If he brings along the camera crew, we’re looking at one hell of a finale.
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