Ochocinco: The Ultimate Catch Recap – Episode 8 – Seven Things We Loved About The Show


Look who got all dressed up this week!


Aw! For us? She shouldn’t have!

The first thing we loved about this week’s show?

- Tara, as usual.


Moving things from Los Angeles to Cincinnati, where he was at mini-camp, Chad continued the shifting around by taking girls from the hotel they were staying at (the Marriott) to a decidedly swanker suite where he was staying (the Cincinnatian). If you find yourself forgetting who the star is, why just check out the quality of the different hotel rooms.

Really, it’s easy to make such a mistake because Tara keeps stealing the show. Her first order of business with Chad was to hit the Jacuzzi…


There it is:


Peek-a-boo, we see more of you!

On stepping into the tub, Tara reported…


…”Dipping my toe into the hot tub was honestly like dipping my toe into the face of the sun.” And then, once inside, she reported…


“My vagina’s on fire!” Chad smiled and looked away embarrassed, as if this were a condition she should have refrained from sharing. Please. If hot water gets her to the freak-in-heat level, imagine what acts on, to use a phrase of Rubi’s, “that sensual level” could do!

Tara went on to dabble in the taboo racialism she sometimes does, rubbing Chad down and calling him “hot chocolate.”


He asked if that made her whipped cream, but she was more eager to embrace the title of “spoiled milk.” Waaaah-waaaaaah.


Chad lightly admonished her in interview for not taking this bath seriously enough. It’s a bath, not an accounting class, you know? If only Chad would realize that what’s good for his show is good for him. Stick around Tara and she’ll make you infinitely entertaining, or at least pick up your slack. At least, that’s what her performance on this show so far indicates.




That’s her reacting to Brittany’s football Q&A during a lunch that followed her comedic bath hour.


As Brittany asked Chad about the size of his play book (not a euphemism), Tara mugged incessantly and asked if her opponent worked for ESPN. If she can’t be your foil, Tara’ll make you hers. What’s not to love?

Tara also plays a big role in the next thing we loved about this episode…

- Dr. Walker.


How weird was it to bring in a sports psychologist (who’s at least, a real doctor, according to the Internet!) to shrink them? She seemed nice and not damaging, so that was good, but what could she have gathered in this one session that story producers didn’t in the weeks since this show started taping? It’s not like these reality stars aren’t given license to open up and unleash at will every second of every day, anyway.


And what did she uncover? Why, things we already knew, or could have discovered by looking at a resume. Rubi is naive, Tiphani is mobile on account of running her own booking agency, Brittany has a son and is a Pisces and Tara is irreverent has hell. Tara asked if Dr. Walker had a straitjacket for her, jokingly said her family died, said her ex was really good at Guitar Hero when asked if she ever dated an athlete and delivered the best line of the show so far: “People with cats kind of creep me out.” “Tara Banks,” you’ve been replaced by Tara Tara.

All of this is to say that giving Tara the chance to talk is giving Tara the chance to entertain. Again: tell us something we don’t know or need a medical degree to discern.

- Cookie-baking.


Speaking of entertaining! During her alone time with Chad in his suite, Brittany told him she had cookies for him and then whipped this up:


“This is what I bake cookies in,” she said. I think she means “cookies” in the Jersey Shore sense of the word, right?

But hey look…


All of her hard work (not) in the kitchen paid off!

- Chad’s ability to harness nature.


Rubi wondered if Chad had “hired” the lightning bugs that illuminated their one-on-one date in a park. But even if he had nothing to do with the fauna, at least we can say that he owned the flora, rocking a flower in his “hair”…


Call this dude Vitamin, ’cause right about now, he looks like nature’s finest.

- Hard-drinking Tiphani.


Tiphani’s shot-pounding reminded us of the halcyon days of Rock of Love, and the first VH1 Tiffany we fell in love with. And threaten us with a good time is all Tiphani did, as she swayed gently, kissed Chad in front of Rubi…


…and that’s about it. How strange was it to see someone on VH1 who could actually hold their liquor?

Back at the suite, she described her surroundings as “looking like the cover of a Fabio novel.”


And though no bodices were ripped, things did get fruity and steamy…



(Although the amount of times open-mouthed kissing on the girls’ part is met with closed-mouth kissing on Chad’s part is starting to get problematic in that it is completely and utterly noticeable.)

- Making a production out of production.


Chad ended up “interrupting” 51 Minds mastermind Mark Cronin to steal a look at Tara’s psych evaluation. It’s always fun when we get to go behind the scenes in an obviously, completely candid, not-at-all expected kind of way.


The reality of reality TV is that if you so choose, you get to hear what people have said about you when you’re not in the room. Who wouldn’t want to live like that?

- No elimination!


The same four women who walked into Paul Brown Stadium are the same four women who walked out, proving that the big to-do about Dr. Walker’s visit was all for naught. Chad admonished Tara’s irreverence (this time to her face!), telling her, “You walkin’ on eggshells.” (Actually, she’s skating on thin ice — walking on eggshells would require effort on Tara’s part. Let’s just all agree that above all else, she’s pushing the envelope, K?)

The best part of the entire elimination, besides Tara’s amazing apparel joke…


…is when he showed her footage of herself being evaluated…


…and she laughed.


The girl redefines shamelessness and it works. In the end, Chad kept her around because, “I have to see where these feelings lead.” More than a few viewers at this point know exactly what this guy is talking about.

Related content
Ochocinco: The Ultimate Catch show page
Ochocinco: The Ultimate Catch videos and extras
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  1. Marlene says:

    honestly Chad i think that Ruby is the best for you because ive been watching this show since it first started and shes really the only one that truly feels something for you. shes gorgeous and i can see you two together in the future.
    T on the other hand is a silly dumbass little girl who needs to grow up shes constantly complaining about everything. make the right choice

    go team RUBY

  2. mark says:

    What a beautiful young lady with the ugliest attitude.
    She could never be my significant other.

  3. Biggerbaddermomma says:

    Marlene is right!

    Ruby is the best for you, Chad! The rest are just interested in your $, but Ruby cares about you for REAL!

    Make the right choice and be happy!

  4. Tee says:

    Ruby is a dingle berry. Tara is a ignorant. Damn sure can’t take her anywhere. Brittany is not cute & Tiphani is boring. Maybe VH1 should bring in Ray J’s girls … lol

  5. sm says:

    Ruby is fraud. She is in it for the fame and money

  6. Dwayne says:

    Do yourself a favor Chad and just pick Tiphani

  7. MsGoodSugga says:

    I think he keeps Tara around for ratings and ratings only. Why else would someone who is suppose to be looking for love keeps someone around like her? Even her whinny voice is irratating.
    Ruby is beautiful and seems to be his pick, but I feel she is also so fake and high maintenance.
    Tiffany is REAL and she is an athlete, so she knows their schedule and she is not clingy or needy. I think she would be there for him when he needed her to be, but as an independant woman, she wouldn’t have to always be in his back pocket. My vote is for Tiffany for keeping it real!

  8. Cimplime says:

    Wow Chad, what are you thinking? Can’t you see that Tara is a joke! She is as fake as they come. Ruby and Tiffany are the real women here. I thought you were a better judge of character than this. Unless you have a hidden agenda before the show ends, dump the baggage and the ditsy chick. Child Pleeease!!!

  9. Freck1es says:

    Hey Chad!
    I think Tiphani is the best match! I believe your mate should be your friend first…. What else will you fall back on??????…. Not too sure about Rubi… I feel she has an alterior motive…… Cant believe you kept that dumb brawed another week… You know who I am talking about… And homegirl with the ex-husband, not sure if she can handle the life you have to offer…. I love the way you have been making your decisions through out the show. Smart moves….. If you don’t find love, HOLLA ;-)! Night night…. lol

  10. harmony says:

    well i heared that ochocinco is going out with one of the house wives so what’s the point of this show?..when the show is over they cant see each other for a couple of months..(just saying!)

  11. harmony says:

    well chad pic tifiani however u spell her name ha!:} i love u chad ♥

  12. Mickey says:

    I have been watching this show for weeks and honestly I think Tara is full of s**t, Ruby is just not that into him,it seems like she has a hidden agenda. Britney and Tiffany seem to be the only ones that are sincere but they are holding back out of fear of being hurt. I sure hope Chad is wise enough to pick the right one.

  13. Melody says:

    I love the show, but I am disappointed that Chad had not gotten ride of Tara yet. Lets get down to business. She is not a contender for a long term relationship. Everything is a joke to her because she is playing him, wants the attention and doesn’t want to expose her true emotions.

  14. mscoopernasty says:

    U not know about this reality love show. u being who u r in the caliber u are i just cant see tara okay

  15. Patrick says:

    I love the show and I am more of a Chad ochocinco fan. I hope that Ruby wins…atleast she could win with me. I think that the only thing that I do not like about this show and shows like this of the past is that no one that does these shows really seem to be looking for love which is so disappointing. Out of all of the beautiful ladies like Ruby and love is found elsewhere…outside the scope of the show….so very disappointing.

  16. kelsey says:

    i love tara..i love that she says whatever and has fun with it

  17. Bajan says:

    Is chad serious?!? clearly tara doesnt give to iish bout this whole show…..this has to be the doing of the producers because i cannot believe hes that much of a dunce to keep someone around that cannot be true to him….strupes smh. he clearly isnt looking for someone serious….

  18. Christina says:

    What does it matter who he picks, he doesn’t stay with them. He is dating Evelyn from the Basketball Wives now!! What a joke!

  19. Kyle says:

    Wuz up Chad,

    You can’t go wrong with Rubi! Lots of poise, the most intelligent girl in the house, honest, beautiful, fine and most mexican girls if treated right are very loyal and with a name like Ochocinco, C’mon Man!

  20. Roddog says:

    Chad why are you wasting your time ,and your viewers time by keeping Tara on the show? My guess is just for ratings. Chad she has clowned you from day one about your Yellow pants too barely touching you in the tub. It is obvious that she does not like African American men dog, and she’s trying to get her own show just like I love New York. Bruh we all know that you don’t want any of these young ladies for a long term commitment.

  21. michelle says:

    tara?? child, please

  22. Ernie says:

    None of these girls are right for Chad. Rubi…too dull, Tara too immature, Brit not pretty and Tiph not flashy enough……although on paper Tiph would be the best match for him.
    He should have forgotten about the show and pursued Cheryl Burke. She IS the total pkg. Eve doesn’t hold a candle to her !

  23. barbieblonde says:

    flavor of love 3 really sucks this year

  24. Drama Free says:

    Hello! people….just checking in to see what all of you are still talking about….been done with the stupid show….it’s alllll B.S…..he’s probally already! working on his second “Ultimate Catch” show…LOL…..it’s just t.v. there there to make…More Money! not…Love…..

  25. Lexa says:

    Can’t believe Chad let Tara go!! He should have taken her to the finals to at least keep some of us entertained…what a shame…guess she just wasn’t into him…don’t get why he didn’t just go in for the kiss…she’s the only one who hasn’t lip-locked w/ him yet…maybe they’ll bring her back for Ocho II and they’ll get serious — for a minute.
    Someone else said he’s dating Evelyn from the basketball wives now…so much for him rejecting black women.I think Chad just likes ALL women…u go Ocho!

  26. Keke1224 says:

    i think this show sucks he only pick Ruby for her looks one thing to always remember she has to get old looks go away. He should of pick Jessica.

  27. 2869130 says:

    What a lovely day for a 2869130! SCK was here

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