You’re Cut Off! 2 Recap – Finale – Pomp And Smarty Pants

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Aw, our little girl’s all grown up…into my mom…?

Perhaps unsurprisingly, no one complains at the top of this finale episode of You’re Cut Off! 2 regarding the choice for VIP. Even the most disagreeable people on the planet can agree that Lauren is pretty damn great.

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Also pretty damn great? Indulging in Lauren’s VIP spoils. The young women discuss their imminent graduation. Marcy thinks her mom is the one who should be cut off because, “She’s raised me this way.” Oh, so now she tells us! It’s a little late in the season to really do anything about that now…unless Marcy is proposing a spin-off. That type of thing wouldn’t be unheard of on VH1 and it sounds like a recipe for hilarity. They could call it: You’re Cut Off From Being Able To Cut Off!!

The girls soon receive a note that opens the door for more reflection: they’re being treated to a night out.

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They return to the tried-and-true topics of what it felt like to be cut off and their general incompetence. Marissa feels that she has come along way in dealing with people, “‘Cause we’re not on this planet alone.” Well, if it took eight weeks for her to realize the world’s population was higher than 8 (+ 1 mom)…hey, a lesson is a lesson. At least she’s not leaving empty-headed.

Aimee brings up Marissa’s comment about Harvard grads and high-school dropouts not hanging out. Thus begins an argument.

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Jessica points out that plenty of wealthy girls have dropped out of school. Conversely, I’m sure plenty of wealthy coeds have paid their way through Harvard. Money: the key to democracy. Marissa reports, “I’ve hung out with girls at a different level, and all they do is get jealous. I don’t like it!” This sounds so snotty, but you know, I believe it. People will take any opportunity to be jealous and finances are such a glaring no-brainer source of strife, they should rename ducats to duh-cats. Marissa thinks Aimee is jealous of her privileges. Aimee thinks Marissa is shallow and doesn’t deserve to graduate. Too bad neither of their opinions are worth even the hot air they’re taking up.

At home, the girls get a note telling them to prepare for graduation. Hana, Jessica and Marissa are to handle the menu and cooking, while Nadia, Aimee and Marcy will take care of the cleaning and decorating. Marcy complains about her group. “Aimee can’t get along with anyone, so she’s worthless to me,” she sighs. Ah, the complicated emotions of an altruist. This leads to virtually incoherent arguing between Aimee and Marcy. At this point so late in the season, they are blue in the face and the logic.

Graduation day! The girls have three hours to scramble and get the house prepared before their parents arrive. For Marcy, this includes spit-cleaning Lauren. Again: altruism. They also must write letters about their You’re Cut Off! experience.

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While they do that, Laura meets with their parents to go over the girls’ progress.

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Laura reports that Marcy has shown her bossy side and it’s clear that she likes being in charge. This is not surprising to her mom, who’s ready for Marcy to move out…probably precisely for that reason.

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Laura says that Laren needs to feel accepted by everyone around her. Additionally, her potential stunted — for example, she has done nothing with her design degree. Her dad thinks what’s holding her back is that there’s been no need for her to get out there. He thinks it’s time for her to take life a little more seriously. Laura tells him it’s time for her to be financially cut off, to which he replies, “Yes ma’am!” Well, at least someone in the house respects authority.

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Laura tells Hana’s mom that when her daughter doesn’t get her way, she becomes resistant. Hana’s mom’s like, “Duh!”…and also probably, “Is it the duh-cats’ fault?” She blames herself for most of Hana’s behavior because she’s not very good at tough love. Well, have we at VH1 got the show for you!

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Laura tattles that Aimee has felt a need to lash out when things don’t go her way. Her mom says she has to learn to live within her means. Since Aimee will be 28 in two months, this is overdue.

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Marissa’s mom reports that the time away from her daughter was hard, but maybe good for her. However “good” and “effective” are two different concepts — she stammers when Laura suggests they spend one day a week apart. I’ve never heard a string of uhs and ums sound so foreboding.

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Jessica’s parents talk about the downside to their daughter’s excess. They say they brought her up to be privileged, not spoiled. Sounds like her cradle balanced on a fine line. It’s a wonder she made it at all! Laura encourages them to pull back so that Jessica might be independent. They’re like, “Meh.”

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Nadia’s (grand-) father takes responsibility for this (grand-) daughter’s behavior. Both of her (grand-) parents are surprised to hear that she’s doing her chores here, as she doesn’t do them at home. I wonder if she had them convinced that she’s somehow disabled. That Nadia’s a wily one!

And then, graduation.

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Nadia’s first. She cries before she can even speak.

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She says she appreciates everything her (grand-) parents do for her, and she has grown in ways she believes she wouldn’t have without being there. She plans on owning up to responsibilities, including spending more time with her daughter.

Her (grand-) parents terms include: Spend more time with her daughter (duh, she just said that!), deciding on a career, helping with house cleaning and drinking only on weekends. Since these literally could not be easier, Nadia accepts. She asks that she be reminded of the terms daily, and her (grand-) parents tell her they’ll be posted everywhere she turns. Good thing “having a better memory” wasn’t part of their terms!

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Marcy says she arrived entitled and selfish and pledges to start to change.

Her parents terms: she needs to live life on her own, take a job in the middle of nowhere, and find her own place. They are giving her the freedom to fly, or so they say. Marcy puts on an aviator cap and accepts.

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Lauren says she’s always the best at everything she does, but the pressure can be unbearable. She says she needs more room to make mistakes and suffer consequences. So she’s cutting herself off from perfection. If that isn’t privileged, I don’t know what is.

Her dad says he’s sorry for making her live up to expectation and feel like she always has to be perfect. As for his terms, he asks her to take life more seriously and live without his support. She also has a deadline of three months to obtain employment. Lauren cries perfect tears and accepts flawlessly.

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Jessica says she has inherited excessive gene. But the upside of her knowing this is that she’s become a scientist who’s discovering new genes. She wants to depend on herself more and her parents less and so she cutting back in all areas. She now realizes that one type of shampoo is an option, instead of five. She wants to grow in certain areas they’ve made too easy, like the area of shampoo obtainment, apparently.

Their terms for her are: she must cut down her luggage from nine pieces to five. Please someone lock me in a suitcase and throw away the key. I think Jessica should now have a spare. They also want her to help take care of their nine Maltese. Jessica accepts.

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Aimee was upset and embarrassed about being cut off, but it finally clicked halfway through the season. She has done this to herself. She’s changing for better and will continue to try to be a person they both know she can be.

Her mom’s comparatively strict terms: within two months, she and her dog have to move out. Her mom won’t be financially responsible for vehicle maintenance or gas or ANYTHING. Aimee accepts. It’s not like she has another choice.

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Marissa reports that while being cut off from luxuries and fashion world have been difficult, being cut off from mom was hardest of all. However, she is becoming more of an accomplished woman who wants to be more financially responsible.

Her mom’s terms are comedy: “Maybe a couple nights a week, you can make me your favorite Sleepytime tea,” she suggests. Suggests! It’s also suggested that Marissa make her mom’s bed a few times a week. With her mom in it? “You are so inspirational to everyone that comes near you,” reports her mom. She might want to survey the girls for a shake-up in world view. She pledges that she will continue working on Marissa’s independence together. That sounds founded on the proper principles and everything! Marissa accepts the terms because DUHHHHHHH.

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Finally, there is Hana. She says it’s an honor being mother’s daughter, and this program was big step to prove to her that she could be a strong woman, mother one day and an angel like her mom. Haha, she’s totally kissing ass.

But it is for naught. Her mother’s terms immediately have her weeping.

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Hana needs a job to cover expenses for new place. It’s suggested that she go through with the real estate license she set out to get, but as not thus far. She has to pay for her car, insurance, spas, shopping. Also: no more traveling. Hana accepts because that’s what you do in these situations.

And then, we see a where-are-they-now segment — we covered it in this post with some post-show expansion. There are also immediate signs of regression like Marissa ending her separation anxiety…

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…simply by ending the separation. Also, Nadia’s flying back first class. Oh well, even if the end wasn’t perfect, at least we got to laugh at the means! That’s what reality TV is all about.

  1. Jo says:

    hahahahaha…I love that Marissa and her mom are basically twins in that shot of them reading.

  2. triniy says:

    jen u is the crazzyest one crazz