Tough Love Miami - Episode 2 – Love And The Internet


This week on Tough Love: Miami, the women get a lesson in how to deal with men in this age of advanced cyber-stalking, text-messaging, and Google searches. And while everyone proves they have something to learn when it comes to technology, Avonte proved she also has something to learn in the “Just being a decent person” department. Not only did she call her date “pitiful” (luckily not to his face), but she did mock his dreadlocks and tell him she hated them. So what do you think, honesty is the best policy, or someone should muzzle this girl?

At first, Jane, who has more issues than we can count, is still marveling at the level of tough love being doled out in episode one. Specifically the fact that Steve basically called out Avonte for enjoying being a mistress for nine years. “Steve was not at all being hard on her. Avonte deserves everything that she gets,” Jane says. Jane’s tune might change later when she gets a can of mugshot whoopass opened on her, but for now, she’s content to act tough.

Steve arrives at Chez Tough Love and tells the women he’s chosen matches for them, and he presents the women with text-only phones to get to know their dates. The catch is that the women don’t realize that they’ll be texting Steve and not their dates.

“For many women, texting is a habit that can not only get out of control. It can turn a man off in no time,” he tells them. So in order to spare them some initial poor-text-etiquette embarrassment, he’ll deal with their phone shortcomings before unleashing them on their real dates.

Christine engages in some L.L. Bean-style double entendres about baiting hooks and getting reeled in with Steve,

and it seems innocent enough but Steve points out that drinking and texting is a no-no, and the wine is certainly helping Christine’s QWERTY get dirty. However, innocent sexy talk is nothing compared to Avonte’s texting no-no, sending six texts in a row before ever receiving one response.

Steve is having none of that, and intentionally stops answering the rapid fire questions she’s sending, but that only makes her send more texts. She’s easily annoyed, that Avonte.

And of course there was Brigette, committing the cardinal sin of too much ROTFL, OMG, LOL!

That girl loves an acronym, but when Steve tells her guys aren’t into them, she’s not LHAO anymore, in fact, she’s like :(

“I did this to save you from yourselves,” he said, which, let’s face it, was necessary because even as a woman, I don’t think I could take getting a text from any of these ladies. But there’s a bigger lesson coming up when the women finally meet their real dates at a sports bar (complete with wide screen TVs surrounding them on all sides).

When Jane meets Brandon, she thinks he’s “f—ing hot,” but Avonte’s not so psyched about her guy, Donald. “I was ready to leave before I got there,” she says. In addition to thinking he looked “pitiful,” Avonti tells him that she hates his dreadlocks.

“When you see someone with dreadlocks, what do you assume?” he asks. “That’s you’re gonna rob me or something.” Rule #28: Don’t be rude.

I don’t know, is this rude, or just totally a—holey?

Brigette is paired back up with her rooftop date, Anthony, and continues to hit it off, and Leilani tells her wanker-banker she’s shocked at how much better looking he is in person than in his photo. Someone get this woman a filter, please. The rest of the ladies seem to be getting along with their dates as well and then Steve drops the Internet Search History bomb. He proves that nothing is sacred or secret online and debuts an embarrassing, revealing slideshow of the women and their most private parts, thoughts, status updates, and in Jane’s case, matters of public record. It’s like he hired the people from The Smoking Gun to find out the dirty on all the Tough Love ladies. He’s managed to dig up Avonte and Leilani’s sexy pictures

and Chasity‘s drunk and falling over shot.

Then there’s Christine’s pictures of her wedding ring on Facebook which imply she’s still married or at least hung up on her old life:

and Brigette’s awkward “There’s a guy eating chips off my crotch” shot:

Considering how well Brigette is getting along with Anthony, she is mortified.

Luckily, Anthony holds her hand and assures her we all have chip-crotch skeletons in our closets.

And finally, the piece de resistence, Jane’s mugshot for DUI.

(Interestingly, no awkward photos of Claudia or Michelle, but at least in Michelle’s case, that’s because she says she would never, ever take pictures of her body. I’m going to go ahead and assume Claudia just doesn’t have a Facebook page.)

Back to that mugshot though. Jane is distraught. Her date seems to be cool with it and claims to know plenty of people arrested for DUI so hey, no big. But Jane can’t believe Steve would out her like this. At their group session, she tells him “There’s a time and a place for everything,” and inside a sports bar while on a first date and/or on national television on Sunday night are not the best times or places. “Since day one, you’ve said if it’s too hot in the kitchen, get out. Well it’s on fire right now,” Jane tells Steve. And Jane’s not even the one in the Hot Seat. That would be Avonte.

Oh, Avonte. When she gets called out on her behavior toward her date and the footage is shown of some of the choice moments they shared, the other girls are shocked.

Even more shocking though, is her inability to realize that her behavior was unacceptable. She claims that the type of man she would date would have to take what she dishes out. “I need a man that can take it!” she cries. I guess the problem is that guys like that have their own flaws. Like being married, say.

She finally accepts that her behavior isn’t nice when Steve tells her “You know how to be respectable and you know how to respect another person, and yet you’re refusing to do it.” Finally, she gets it and says “I realized I was too aggressive with Donald…and maybe I need to bring it back.” Yes, please. Take it down like ten notches.

Next week…Makeovers!!!

If you want to keep up to date with Steve Ward or even ask him for some love advice, make sure you follow him on Twitter (@stevenbward), like him Facebook, and friend him on Google Plus.

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