Master Matchmaker Steve Ward is back for a third season of Tough Love, and this time he’s traveled south to Miami where the heat is definitely on. Steve will be giving us his thoughts on every episode, and today we spoke with him at length not just on dealbreakers, but on the big news story of the day, Kim Kardashian‘s divorce from Kris Humphries, and how he thinks Kim is laughing all the way to the bank.
One of the things I was most surprised by this week was how sympathetic Leilani was to George when he said he had Tourettes’s. I thought she might make that into a bigger issue. Were you surprised by her reaction?
No, actually. That’s something that I hope is starting to come out by now, beneath her superficial exterior, Leilani is actually a genuine person and I think she has a hard time showing that side of herself because she worries that being vulnerable or susceptible to people’s attacks or insults is a sign of weakness. She had a hard time showing that side, but I knew it was there, that’s why I cast her on the show in the first place. I really wasn’t surprised by how she reacted to George.
Did any of the men have dealbreakers that surprised the women?
Michelle was a little caught off guard by the guy who didn’t want to have kids, and she never really thought of it like that before, that it might be a dealbreaker, and that’s really the point of these challenges in general, to get these girls thinking about things that matter. Because a lot of problems people have are such that they don’t know how to envision what they want for themselves in a realistic way. If a dealbreaker truly is a dealbreaker, you’re going to want to find out about it as soon as possible.
Do you think you changed the women’s minds about what were truly dealbreakers for them?
I deal with this all the time, you can have preferences all day long but, and I said this on the show, you have to make exceptions for exceptional people. If you can’t be willing to see why this would work and you only focus on why it wouldn’t, you’re already steering yourself down that path. That’s why I told Christine you need to take a turn to positive town.
I thought it was funny on the episode when Michelle and some of the other girls talked about deep conversation and she brought up topics like abortion and the death penalty, would you ever suggest they have those conversations on a date to get to know one another?
That’s another one of those dealbreakers. If it’s that important to you then yes, bring it up. If it’s not the be-all, end-all, then don’t worry about it, don’t discuss it. It really depends how important it is to you.
I think it’s odd that Jane wouldn’t even kiss Arthur though, sex is so far from their minds and she won’t even take that little step.
And that’s because she’s still not over her ex-boyfriend, so I had a feeling there was something going on with Jane that she wasn’t being honest about, and I intend to get to the bottom of it. We’ll find out more in the next episode. Sidebar question — how nuts does Kim Kardashian end up looking with this divorce?
Isn’t it great? I mean, between the sex tape and the reality shows and now this with the marriage, it’s unbelievable. It’s so painfully obvious! You know what’s worse? It’s like, all these people are getting away with murder. Like Charlie Sheen, he monetized the s— out of his meltdown. Ashton Kutcher? Go ahead, go have sex with whoever you want, buddy. Why not? You’re on the number one sitcom, who cares? You know what I think is so funny? Let me put it this way, I agree with a lot of the observations of the Tea Party. I don’t agree with their policies or what they want to do about things, but I agree with a lot of their observations because the moral decline in this country is epic. But the reason is because it’s in direct correlation with believers. People that believe in ANYthing, including religious values, so moral decency is bound to go out the window. But what I love so much about these stories is the fact that people don’t understand what we’re coming to. All that Nostradamus-Mayan calendar-end of times prophecy is the next sweeping change in evolution. Automation is taking jobs away from real people, the world is over-populating, we just hit seven billion people, and there’s nothing for a lot of these people to do. And you’ve got people like the Kardashians and Paris Hilton and Snooki and Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan, the list is endless, of all these people who are contributing to the decline and getting rich along the way while everyone else is getting poorer. Ordinary people are saturated by what the media is showing them: The more you screw up, the more fun you have and the more you get paid.
Does that affect the type of girls who apply for your show?
Absolutely! Look at Jane, she came on my radio show last night and I promoted her song “Show Me The Money,” that’s the name of her song! But it’s my job to be the voice of reason. Not to shoot down anyone’s dreams, but to be the voice of reason and talk sense into them. Jane even said on my show last night that she saw that we get 1.5 million viewers per episode and said “Sign me up!” She had no idea what the point of the show was. I tweeted earlier today “Is anyone else convinced yet that this is a family of fakes?” and I included the link to Kim’s divorce, and this girl just wrote back to me “Why do you have to be so mean? What have they done to you? Getting divorced is a very sad time in a person’s life.” First of all, if you’re going to sell the rights to air your wedding, if you’re going to invite paparazzi on your honeymoon and sell your photos, and ask everyone to watch your life, that’s what they’re getting paid for isn’t it? “How can I be so mean?” You’re getting paid for me to watch your life.
To be honest with you, I’m single and I’m disappointed in women right now. I’m disappointed in men too, and it’s okay to be disappointed, I still believe in monogamy and love, but it’s a lot of work now. It’s so easy to be a screw-up now. Walking the straight and narrow used to be the only way, that was the path to success and happiness. Pfft. Just ask Snooki or Lohan or Kardashian or any one of these jokes, they’re laughing their way to the bank. Why be good when it’s so fun to be bad? The only reason why people don’t do things? Consequences. People need to check and balance each other. I’m sorry for this sidebar, Liz.
That’s okay, I’m happy for your opinion on all of this.
With that being said, I think what’s going on these days is a joke and it’s unproductive and I can sit there and tell people all day that they need to focus on themselves, that’s what I say on Tough Love. That you have to reinvent yourself. I’m not saying disrespect yourself or throw your values and standards out the window, I’m telling you to check yourself before you wreck yourself.
What do you think of the show’s critics, or someone who hasn’t seen the show but makes assumptions based on the fact that it’s showing women in bikinis and this guy is yelling at them, and they assume you’re feeding into society’s problems?
They’re blind. They are completely narrow-minded. They’re walking through life like those horses in Manhattan with blinders on the side of their face blocking everything in their periphery. Wake up and take a look around you? Do you have any idea what’s going on around you in the world?