Basketball Wives – Episode 4 – Smelling Her Own Pee-Pee

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Looks like Kenya is no longer enemy number one this week! Dubious congratulations go out to Kesha for that honor. So what made the tables turn?

First off, Suzie and her dog go to Jennifer‘s place to once again gossip about Kenya who is, at this stage, still not beloved by all. First it was the YouTube videos, now Suzie arrives with the information that Kenya went to the Juliet night club and asked to pay $50 an hour instead of the actual price of $1,000 and hour to shoot her video there, and once her manager found out the price of alcohol at the club, asked if they could serve Kool-Aid instead.

This is a source of amusement and confusion for Jennifer. It is funny, but more than that, Jen is like

“Look, Kenya’s fan base is Kenya, Kenya, and Kenya,” Suzie says trying to diminish her new acquaintance’s dreams and goals. I mean, look, sure, so far she’s only represented herself as a bumbling independent artist, but we don’t all start big, Suzie!

Kesha and Evelyn seem to have struck up a friendly little relationship now, and when they hang out alone, it’s a long way off from the last time they met, when Kesha and Kenya were at each other’s throats. Kesha unloads on Evelyn, confiding that she would prefer that Evelyn attend her cancer charity event over Jennifer (since, obviously, both of them won’t agree to go), and then she brings up Tami. Kesha’s still a little offended by her past conversations with Tami, especially one where Tami insinuated that Kesha wasn’t “black enough.” “Why does she have the right to even comment on what I am or what I label myself as?” Kesha asks Evelyn. Evelyn tells Kesha to have this conversation with Tami and that Tami will respect her for bringing these issues up. Evelyn might be wrong.

In Jennifer’s world, shes just working on her business.

She’s doing photo shoots (in case you haven’t seen the finished product, here’s the cover of J’adore Magazine she was featured on) and promoting her lip gloss line with a big launch party. At the party, only Suzie and Kenya show up (that had to be weird right? I mean, Suzie is not shy about her dislike for Kenya, but we kind of glossed over that aspect tonight…)

“The people that are important are here,” Jen says when Suzie asks where everyone else is, which is hilarious because all of a sudden they’ve made Kenya “important.” Not that she wasn’t before, but it’s this kind of labeling that gets everyone on this show in trouble. You’re in the circle or you’re not. You’re important or you’re not. None of it really matters except at moments like this.
Suzie’s not thrilled that Kenya, who she thinks is a phony, is working hard to be important to Jennifer.

After the launch, Tami brings up the fact that she wasn’t at the party because she wasn’t actually invited. “Jen’s Lucid lip gloss launch. I think this is like the tenth one, but nonetheless, I wasn’t invited.” She and Evelyn discuss the value of solid friendships and without exactly saying that Jennifer is disloyal, that’s exactly what they’re saying. “She’s really smelling her own pee-pee,” Evelyn says.

“I hate you for saying that,” Tami says. We all do, Tami. That’s not an image we can easily erase.

Tami continues to go off on Kenya, recalling her business meeting with Kenya which went so very, very wrong too. She tells Evelyn that Kenya snatched the CD player from her hotel in order to play music for Tami and the faces say it all.

In this never-ending expositional scene, Evelyn then brings up Kesha’s issues with Tami, and she tells Tami that her comments about Kesha’s race really struck a nerve.

“She can’t be that sensitive,” Tami says, but you know that if the tables were turned Kesha would already have received a palm smack to the forehead, preferably in a Roman night club. But not only does Tami think Kesha’s sensitive, she is also offended herself that Kesha didn’t bring this information to her directly. “She needs to get a f—ing ife, because if that s— offended her…F— her.” It is exhausting knowing what the right course of action is with any of these women, isn’t it?

“Suzie’s just different,” Royce says when Kesha expresses her concerns about bring Suzie to her charity event which is coming up soon.

“I mean, you have to take Suzie for who she is an accept her, otherwise, you’re going to be walking around with a shocked face every day.” Kesha doesn’t so much seem shocked by Suzie as much as she’s just not into public outbursts about orgasms and oral sex, so I’m not about to fault her for being faint of heart around her.

The conversation also turns to Kenya, who Kesha’s still not vibing because she and Royce feel like they were just trying to offer her constructive criticism about her video, and Kenya threw them under the bus for it. “At some point, Kenya’s going to realize that Royce and I were just trying to help her. She seems like the ind of person who learns from experience. When things go wrong, she’ll learn.”

The day of her video shoot (which appears not to be at Juliet after all??) it seems like Kenya might learn that lesson sooner rather than later, because no one is showing up on time. Kenya still takes Kesha’s advice as a personal affront and not as the helpful critique it was meant to be. “I think there’s a big difference between somebody giving you criticism, and actually giving you criticism as a means to help you fix it,” she says, “as opposed to somebody giving you criticism and saying ‘Well, I’m not doing anything.’”

The shoot actually seems to go well (although you’d think that it would have taken a full day just to get Kenya’s body Bedazzled),

so maybe she didn’t learn anything the hard way after all. But before we finish talking about the shoot, let’s look at some of the better stills from that scene, please.




It’s finally time for Kesha’s charity event to support the National Brain Tumor Society, and everyone except for Jennifer is there. (I would assume Royce is there but she’s just maintaining a safe distance from Evelyn and Shaunie.) Kesha was worried about how Suzie would behave at the event, so she decides to make a blanket announcement to the entire group to be on their best behavior, but BTW, keep your eye on Suzie for me, wouldya?

Oh giiirl. That sets everyone off. “Evvvverybody was offended by Kesha’s little speech,” Tami says. “We all felt like we were in grade school and she was chastising us about one of our classmates who acted a damn fool on the last museum trip.” Well, I mean, she’s not THAT far off. After Kesha gives her speech, the women fall silent and don’t really know how they should behave, so they just freeze up, which is also awkward because then Kesha tells Suzie that everyone is acting like a Debbie Downer. And if there’s one thing you shouldn’t call Shaunie, it’s a Debbie Downer.

Tami leaves in order to prevent a real scene from occurring but she is officially not on Team Kesha now. Kesha’s on her s— -list for so many reasons, so when they all get together for dinner, it’s on. It’s their last night in Miami, so Evelyn brings the girls together for dinner (the last supper?) and immediately asks Tami and Kesha to has out their issues, and Tami tells Kesha “I basically don’t want to hear what you have to say because everybody else knows this about me, whatever you need to say about me or however you feel…bring it to me. I don’t like a bitch to go behind my back.”

Kenya is LOVING that all the attention is off her.

When Kesha tells Tami the reason she spoke to Evelyn about her issues was because she was trying to avoid a confrontation, Tami tells her to shut the f— up and move on.

Kesha’s not used to Tami’s ways, and she’s no accustomed to conflict of any kind, so she’s just kind of baffled by how to respond, so she tells Tami that she did plan to bring these issues up with her at some point. “Bitch, it’s too late,” Tami says. “Please don’t call me a bitch and be rude,” Kesha tells her. Which leads to the moment that you were all waiting for, the moment that was built up for weeks, the “Bitch. Bitch. And more bitch” moment.

Have I mentioned that Kenya is loving this whole scene?

Suzie even calls Kenya out for “basically being an a—hole in front of Kesha’s face,” and later calls her a bipolar psycho. Where is this line of confessional going? I can’t wait to see if these hints that Suzie is giving about Kenya go somewhere really dark, because that’s what I’m feeling.

There’s no end in sight to the Kesha-bashing either, because after that, Tami launches into the way Kesha treated them all at the charity event. Evelyn, who was formerly on Kesha’s side, is clearly uncomfortable, and tells her “Honestly, I was really on your mother-f—ing team till today. I really was. And I’m ready to go.”

“I’ve never been around a group of ladies like this one,” Kesha says. “Right now I’m not feeling like these are my type of people.”

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