Here’s an idea. The women of Basketball Wives are all serious entrepreneurs, and they also can’t seem to get their co-stars’ names out of their mouths, so why don’t they all go in on Basketball Wives brand lozenges? That’s a freebie, ladies.
Evelyn, Tami, and Nia are all still angry at Jennifer because she filed a police report after the slap, but Jennifer is also giving interviews about the situation which continues to piss Evelyn and Nia off. “She’s dead to me,” Nia says, and Tami tells her “I feel you on that.” Which sort of sounds like Tami is agreeing that Jen is dead to her also, doesn’t it? But in the next confessional, Tami actually says that this isn’t her battle to wage, so her feelings for Jennifer haven’t changed at all. Still buds!
Here’s the thing though, these ladies all still have a vacation to go on together. Not only is this resort they all plan to visit going to have to find separate quarters for Jen and Ev, they’re also going to have to keep Tami and Kesha apart, too. And is Nia going? Is she part of this group now? I don’t even know. Whatever. The main point is, this vacation sounds like a terrible idea.
But Evelyn says “I can’t be fake. I’m not going to smile in your face and act like we’re cool. I don’t give a f—, I’m 36, I’m mature, I don’t think like that…I think like, I wanna take f—in’ blood outta your face,” and she enlists Tami to be her bodyguard on vacation. If Jennifer is going to be there, Evelyn will need Tami to break up any and all fights and just keep things, you know, legal and out of jail.
Royce isn’t attending this girls’ trip, proving once again she’s the only one with any sense. She’s staying behind to work rather than attend what she calls a potential “crap-fest,” since she has a lot of lines to learn for her new play. Suzie‘s going on the trip though, in spite of what she’s heard about Tahiti, namely that it’s inhabitants are cannibals. “I’m going to offer Kenya to them,” she says. It’s nice that she’s found the bright side to cannibalism.
Over at Chez Ev and Ocho, the couple discusses interior decorating (Evelyn would like to tone down the red chandelier and the red sofa.
I would like to come over and watch one of the three TVs, please.) Things get a little more serious though when she tells him that despite last season’s storyline about having twins, Pepe and Esteban, she’s not into the idea anymore and wants to focus on herself instead. Chad seems cool with it, he loves her regardless of how many kids are in their brood, and one thing that will never change is his love for creating poems about Evelyn. Like this one:
They also discuss their wedding, and once they get past the idea that Chad will be wearing a red paisley suit, Evelyn brings up a detail that she hopes he’ll go for. She would like her brother-in-law, Anthony, who has been sick recently, and he sister Sylvia, to renew their vows at the wedding. Evelyn still worries that Anthony won’t be able to attend, but it’s a lovely touch to a day she already knows will be emotional.
Big news in the world of Jennifer, when she tells Kenya that after months and months of silence, she and Eric have finally spoken for the first time since his drink throw. Jennifer tells Kenya that Eric took responsibility for a lot of the bad things that went on between them and Jennifer says it brought tears to her eyes to hear him admit that. They’re taking baby steps toward a cordial relationship. And as is always the way on this show, as soon as one relationship is repaired, another must suffer, so Kenya asks Jen about the lawsuit against “Jen is dead to me” Nia, specifically what it’s like filing a suit against a former friend, and Jen tells her all bets are off “once you put your hands on me.”
“She needs to know that what she did was wrong.”
Tami and Evelyn are on an adventure to go get mammograms together, and while Tami’s an old pro, Evelyn has never gotten one before. “Child, it’s gonna be a mess,” Tami says. Tami’s own experience is epic:
Evelyn worries her implants might pop, but aside from that, all seems to go well. And we also learned that Tami loves colonics. All in all, an interesting day!
Suzie and Jennifer meet because they haven’t hung out since the slap, and Suzie’s been worried that Jen is mad at her. (She’s not, so she says, but can you blame her for not wanting to talk to anyone that was there?)
Jennifer has also come to the conclusion that she never wants to deal with Evelyn again, ever, in life. Except for when they all go on a girls’ trip together. I just…I mean…how will that even work? Who knows. I’m going to let them figure that out.
Royce and her dad finally get their scene (we can only take so many previews of Royce crying!) and as we’ve heard all season long, he’s concerned about how serious she’s gotten with Dezmon and her past boyfriends, so quickly. “I’m not a serial dater, I’m a relationship girl,” she tells us. “You think that you need to be with somebody all the time,” Papa Reed tells her, and to boot, he doesn’t like the age difference between Dez and Royce. Mostly, he’s a concerned grandfather because he doesn’t want Royce’s son exposed to “all” the men she’s and Royce is hurt that he would even insinuate that.
“You think that that’s how I am and it sucks!” she tells him. “You know I’m not that person.” She just wants him to accept that she’s happy, and he’s a little harder than that, he tells her “It’s not always about you, Royce. Right now, my concern is with my grandson.”
Royce’s relationship with her father is strained, that’s for sure, but unlike say, Jen and Evelyn, or Kesha and Tami, the stakes are higher and this isn’t something Suzie can try to resolve with a peace accord. It’s real and it’s obvious that it hurts.