Talking Couples Therapy Episode 7 With Dr. Jenn Berman


Dr. Jenn Berman Couples Therapy

Dr. Jenn Berman has been counseling people and offering advice to people in need for some twenty years now, but on VH1′s Couples Therapy, this marks her first time working with a group of ten celebrities whose relationships are in desperate need of repair. We’ll be checking in with Dr. Jenn each week to chat about the progress of her patients on the show, and what she really thinks of their behavior. This week we got into Linda’s relationship with her mother, who had some strong opinions about Charley, plus we addressed the Vienna-Kasey-Lee love triangle.

At one point during their argument, Kasey said he felt led on by Vienna and that their experience there was a waste of time. What do you think of his saying that, as the therapist who was really trying to help them?
Vienna Girardi Kasey Kahl Couples Therapy Fight
I think he was upset in the moment and feeling hurt, and what he meant was that it was a waste of his time if she didn’t want to be with him. More than anyone, Kasey has repeatedly said that the show was the most life-changing, magnificent experience of his life, so I know that that’s not how he feels. We talked extensively about how life-changing this was for him and he has walked away a better man. The breakthrough he had in episode three changed the way he sees himself and the way his life is going and I know he didn’t mean it in that way.

It felt like the group as a whole was more sympathetic to Kasey at this point and might have been turning on Vienna, was that the case?

I think that a lot of the cast members felt very protective of Kasey and they saw how devoted he was to Vienna. It was hard for them to remain objective and to say hey, if she’s in love with someone else, she should be with that person, she shouldn’t be with Kasey. If Vienna doesn’t want to be with Kasey, it’s a favor to him because it frees him up to be with someone who does want to be with him.

Linda called the proposal between Mike and Deja one of the most perfect proposals you can imagine, it really was a magical moment. How did you find those two?

The executive producer found them and just loved their story and felt like it was great opportunity for our couples to have that sort of reminder of new love and true love. The cast was excited to help Mike pick out the engagement ring and when they found out they were going to be part of the proposal, everyone was so thrilled. Everyone got into it, even DMX was into it, it was so poignant.

Do you think that Linda’s mom’s outward skepticism of the relationship between Linda and Charley was was most affected her and caused her to have doubts?

I think getting her mom’s approval was one of the many elements that Linda struggled with. I think she’s undergone terrible media scrutiny, she’s had conflicts with her family, you know, she’s had a lot working against the relationship and I think her mom was just one element, but an important element. It was important that we had that session together.

Linda’s perspective on her relationship is really amazing, how she says she’s at peace with essentially leaving Charley behind after she’s gone and knowing he’ll have a second life without her. That’s incredible and heavy but also a really realistic way to look at things.

Yup. And it’s also very selfless. That’s one of the things that stands out in their relationship, Linda’s concern, if you listen to her, over and over again it’s “Am I being fair to Charley?” The question is never “Do I love Charley?” or “Do I want to be with Charley?” it’s always “Is this what’s right for him?” which is so loving.

Do you think she’s always had that perspective she describes, or did she gain that from therapy with you?

I think she’s a very loving person and she’s always tried to have in mind what is in his best interests. Their part of therapy was helping him and her figure out what was in their best interest.

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  1. rose says:

    Vienna is a con artist. She’s playing both of them. She has to first get herself together before she gets with anyone else. She’s the one with the problem.

  2. fashion says:

    i agree that kasey should be with someone who wants to be with him however i also think that someone needs to put vienna in a serious realty check. i’m a 48yr old woman who has lived a whole lot of life. i have also been in some very dark places of confusion,depression and utter selfishness so i can see exactly what i feel like she’s doing. she got mad because lee didn’t want to get married when she felt they should so like a child having a tamtrum she leavesn but who does she run to & cause problems for when things get a little rough but lee. she has no idea what real love is because if she did then she would learn to love herself & stop acting like a spoiled brat. what she needs to do is spend time correcting herself before she hurts & damages another man. good men are hard enough to find as is & people like vienna make it even harder. grow up vienna & take responsibility for your actions for once in your life because believe me when i say that you will reap whart you sow so you better sow good seed.

  3. Karen PsyD says:

    Are you kidding me Dr Jenn and Dr Mike? Are you actually in a therapeutic relationship with these couples? If so, you have no business proposing to your girlfriend in front of clients. That type of self-disclosure is NEVER part of a therapeutic relationship, which is supposed to be a one-way relationship and not about the therapist ! Additionally, the hugging, physical contact, and praying with clients is inappropriate, even first year graduate students know this. It is such a shame when the public gets the wrong idea about therapy from shows like this.

  4. Karen says:

    Wow, having something intelligent to say about the faux therapy gets deleted?

  5. Lady Di says:

    I normally wouldn’t be so mean, but Vienna is trash. Why would she bring Kasey on the show if she had no intentions on being with him, and then she had the audacity to let him find out like that, she is disgusting to me. Why didn’t she come on the show with the guy that she wanted to be with …oh I forgot he has a girlfriend that he lives with, she is an idiot. I think that she is all about getting attention and only wants tv time because she was LIVING with the other guy when she went on The Bachelor and now she has spent all of this time on this show with Kasey when she never wanted to be with him. She creates drama for tv time and if I were either of these guys I wouldn’t give her a chance.

  6. Shell says:

    I think Kasey should run really fast from this chick. Come on Kasey you have caught her in so many lies and she keep changing it to make you look as if you are crazy. She told you all kinds of lies about Jake and than about Lee, is anyone catching this. Now she tell the therapy last night that Kasey is volient and she have call the police on him 8 time. Come on now and she turn everything to be about her. He don’t support me, he never have my back, and don’t come to my defense, i do all that for him. Vienna you are a lie, i see Kasey jump through hoops for you and you be wrong but he take up for you. Than whenever he catch you in a lie and he put you out there, you get mad at him and lie saying he’s crazy. He said it right last night when you get caught in a lie and want somebody to feel sorry for you you start crying. I don’t like you and what you do to men. You lie on them to make yourself out to be a victim, when you are manipulate, a user, selfish and self centered. Lee said it last night that you do and say whatever to get what you want. You came and messed up his relationship with his girlfriend which he said he loved and they had a Good relatioinship, unlike the story you told at the jewerly store. Vienna needs help, is anyone going to hold her accountable for what she’s doing to theses guys? Can the therapy really see that Vienna is a lie? Kasey run stop putting yourself in bad situation for Vienna. She don’t love you and you be fighting her fights when they are really not true or your fight. Also you can’t be mad at Lee be mad at Vienna because she’s the one been straining you along. If Kasey go back with her than i have to say you deserve what you get, because now you know.

  7. r081n says:

    Vienna, why would you bring someone on TV to work out your relationship and not truly want to work it out? Oh, I no why. Because your are phony and had add another opportunity to be on TV again. By your behavior you act like you are someone important and what you say matters to people. Well it doesn’t. Your behavior is tasteless and cruel. I hope it was worth it…SMILE..for the camera!!! You will do anything to get on TV even if it hurts others you fake. Whats next porno?

  8. sweets says:

    Vienna is a lying,manipulative azz. She has a serious problem. Why she would bring Kasey on the show knowing all the time she wanted to be with the other guy. Her stupid behind should have come on the show with him. She wants attention. Well honey let me tell get over yourself. Vienna is tatsteless, classless, just and overall joke. I hope she ends up not having either on of them.

  9. Brooklyn Sandy says:

    I know this is a couples’ therapy show but I think Kasey should have the option to still work with the counselors separate from Vienna. How is she allowed to ask him to leave when she lured him there under false pretenses? If anything, she should be made to leave since 1) she isn’t in a “relationship” with the person she’s on the show with and 2) she needs individual therapy before she should even think about being with someone else. I know Kasey is hurt but Dr. Berman told him the right thing – he needs to let Vienna go so he can be with someone who loves him for him. And, he’s making really good progress…

  10. PhoenixRC says:

    Vienna is PURE WHITE TRASH!!!! She thinks that the world revolves around her. That Lee guy better run for his life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kasey is so much better off without her. He can go on and find a real woman who is stable and not so crazy and self absorbed.

  11. Jay says:

    Why are reichen and rondiney here? They had like 10 minutes total during the whole season

  12. Zoob says:

    I will honestly really begin to dislike this show if Vienna gets her way and the producers make Kasey leave. If this is couples therapy, I am sorry but he should get to chose to stay there and continue to get therapy after having to deal with a manipulative, lying, fame hungry, crooked-eyed piece of trash like Vienna. She always plays the victim in a situation, using tears as a power tool over those that may actually care about her. Good men who want to play hero end up falling for her, and because she’s so insecure she ends up using and abusing all of them. She clearly has NO idea what love is. Love is selfless, love is kind, and if you love someone you are SELFLESS as well. I wish someone would give her a STERN TALKING TO and a wake up call.

    If Lee has a wonderful girlfriend at home it sincerley bothers me he would even consider being back with someone like Vienna. She keeps picking the same broken men in a different shell. Clearly she also claims that all of them men in her life abuse her and abuse alcohol (and then later changes her tune) so she can further manipulate, belittle, and try to keep power over them. Deep down… it is clear she is BROKEN, SAD, INSECURE, and needs some serious help. She is a sad, sad little girl.

  13. Lilliana says:

    As for Linda, she should be ashamed of herself. No, you can’t help who you “love”. But, hard decisions are what separated children from adults. Kids will eat ice cream an cake all day long simply because it taste good even though they will get sick. An adults know that even though it tastes good you have to put a limit so you don’t get sick. Linda, is spending all this time and effort to making a relationship work that you can see if wrong from the start. That little boy needs to be afforded the same chance to live a life that she had. An adult would know this and not move forward with this relationship. What an idiot. He’s only 23 NOW! 19 when you met. You should have said “Run away little boy; I don’t do jail bait or rob cradles.” But it’s not too late. Stop NOW… You are… #RobbingHisLife

  14. Lynda says:

    I love couples therapy and I’m only thirteen yrs old, I really love DMX and Tashera because there black and funny as heck and my second favorite couples are Linda and Charlie because they dnt argue alot and they always compromise my least favorite couple is Vienna and Casey just because they do to much but I cant wwit for the next season Lynda collins!