Our very own Carrie Keagan made a trip to Staten Island–yes, on purpose–to visit Big Ang‘s Drunken Monkey, the set of many an important conversation (and fight) over almost two seasons of Mob Wives. Since she traveled so far, Ang was kind enough to let the Big Morning Buzz Live host mix up some drinks for ACTUAL patrons–to be fair, she’s had some training.
Even if you don’t have access behind the bar, here are some important tips gleaned from Carrie’s test run as a Shaolin bartender, to keep in mind for your next boozy event.
1. Understand your purpose.
“The object is to get everybody drunk,” Drunken Monkey staffer Frankie reminds us. This holds true for private parties, as well. If you operate a non-profit operation, it’s still easier to deal with friends and family when they’ve knocked back more than a few wine coolers.
2. Flaunt your best assets
“Make sure you’re sticking your chest out the whole time you’re doing it,” Frankie says. This applies to ladies and gents (with large pecs), we’d imagine.
3. Maintain a heavy hand.
Because who wants to go through the trouble of re-pouring liquor into weak drinks?
4. Encourage customers to make straightforward decisions.
Tanqueray and Tonic: exactly what it sounds like. It’s not your fault if that “redheaded slut” wasn’t up to snuff–that could mean anything!
5. Dancing on the bar is not off-limits to employees.
All the better to serve you from, my lushes.