Jen the Pen cried. A lot. Dating a devout Muslim and raising their son to have the best of both worlds took a toll on her this season. She and Consequence moved past the bickering and comprised. Love conquered all. There’s a quote: Nobody said it’d be easy, they said it’d be worth it. Jen’s offering her 10 tips on making a relationship happy and lasting. – Bene Viera
One thing I’ve found to be a constant among me and Consequence’s fans is that they love to LOVE our relationship. Whether it is a Monday night episode of Love and Hip Hop or a simple picture on Instagram of the two of us, our fans truly route for us as a couple and family. Relationships are A LOT of work and if you are a faithful viewer of the show you get a pretty deep view into how hard both parties (being Cons and I) have to work to keep our relationship and family on track.
When people fall in love and decide to marry or have a baby, the expectation is nearly always that love, marriage, a baby and the happiness they bring will last. As the vows say, till death do us part. But as we all know “till death do us part” isn’t in everyone’s cards and young couples are splitting left and right; and if they are parents they find themselves co-parenting, living under different roofs and trying to find balance for their child.
I, like most girls, grew up with that idea that every relationship be portrayed just like a fairytale. It took me years to realize that my relationships were not going to be what I saw on TV or in movies–that I could indeed meet my Prince Charming but not until I understood that my “Prince” would also have to be human and have faults and issues no matter how wonderful he is.
For Cons and I the commitment we made when we decided to bring a baby into this world was enough of a reason to ALWAYS work at our relationship and fight hard to keep our family together. Don’t get me wrong though, just by saying, “We have this child to raise, we need to stay together” isn’t enough to keep both parties loyal and committed. It’s constant work everyday, from understanding what fights are worth having, ignoring little things like socks being left on the bathroom floor, remembering to let your partner know they are appreciated even if it’s just a simple “Thank You for doing that for me” and NEVER saying “no” to a little foreplay (even if you are tired from running around after that baby all day!)
Here’s my list of ten things you can do everyday in your relationship to keep it happy, healthy and moving forward. Because at the end of each day, we all just want someone to come home to and love.
1. See your partner for who he/she really is.
2. Be willing to learn from one another.
3. Take a step back and analyze what starts fights and what approach can be taken the next time to avoid those screaming matches.
5. Remember what drew you to your partner in the very beginning. Recreate moments that really connected the two of you.
6. Never say no to sex ladies!! Trust me when I say that hour or so of sleep you may lose will end up benefiting you the next day. The saying goes “happy wife, happy life,” but you need a SATISFIED man before you get that happy life :0)
7. Get comfortable being alone. Neediness is not sexy. Every person in a relationship needs his or her “me” time.
8. Respect your relationships privacy. (Meaning, when you fight don’t blast it all over social media).
9. Be Patient. “Love is Patient, Love is Kind”
10. Support each other’s careers, and dreams.
When both people in a relationship WANT it to work, it will.
- Xoxo Jen The Pen