Chrissy Teigen Recaps Model Employee Episode Five: Cold Drinks And Melted Spray Tans

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After lavish parties and poolside challenges seemingly without consequences, Model Employee is getting down to business in its search for the “face” of Mandalay Bay. Host Chrissy Teigen is back with more insight into how to best serve drinks for the rich and famous, as well as the pros and cons of surviving on an all-chicken finger diet in triple digit heat.

Read on for Chrissy’s thoughts on the first elimination and dearly departed Aspen. Take it away, C!

This week’s episode opens with painnnnnful-to-watch footage of Aspen completely bombing the Hoodie Awards red carpet. I mean, I know we saw it last week, but it was just as painful to watch the second time! And boy, have I been there. I mean, she calls Judge Mathis, “Tavis”–which is hilarious to me not because of the mix up but of all people in the world to think someone was, Tavis? I go years and years without thinking of that man. Anyhow, as I said: I’ve been there and there is nothing quite as embarrassing. Usually on these red carpets, interviewers will have a producer right there and maybe the addition of an earpiece feeding you names, questions and facts. Almost like your own personal Anne Hathaway in Devil Wears Prada. Anyhow, I don’t know if she had this person or perhaps just misheard Mathis as Tavis? Whatever the reason, it was hilarious. And Shah killed the challenge. Doesn’t this chick get hangovers?

Model Employee Host Chrissy Teigen Thumbnail

Anyhoo, this episode marks my first time getting to see Jassmine frustrated and snap. She is so cool and calm and together all the time that she must have been Level-10 over Britany by this episode because this girl had nooooo patience for her this week. And poor Brit. She could use a little help in the comeback department: Brit, if you’re reading this, call me. In return, she can help me learn to smile at people as they are total a–holes to my face. I don’t know how she does it.

Kurt the butler, who was probably one of my favorite human beings on set, AND A REAL BUTLER who I grilled constantly (poor guy), delivers the challenge for this week: the girls will be given a series of poolside challenges that put them head to head with other models. And let me tell you, this had to have been the HOTTEST day of the year. Seriously. I go to Vegas alllllll the time and I have never ever been this skin-boiling hot. I couldn’t even concentrate I had spray tan melting away in my cleavage, hair extensions stuck to the back of my neck–and I actually had the luxury of not having to be outside so often!! Since, thankfully, no one passed out, we can definitely say these women are much stronger than I am. Mentally and physically. Hence my cover-up. I basically ate chicken tenders for 30 days–they must have been healthy as shit in their suite because their bodies were bangin’.

Where were we? Ok first up, chair stacking with Jassmine vs. Johanna, featuring some hilariously-awkward bright-white-shoes-with-bikinis speed walking. Jo admits to having zero strategy while Jassmine seems to have her plan down which ends up with her doing a much better, cleaner job. Johanna was a chair-throwing mess.

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