To prove she’s trying to change her life for the better, Tami meets with a life coach to whom she can vent a little and get some advice about how to stop letting other people prevent he from being this better, less angry version of herself. “Even though I’m trying to move on,” she says “I tend to fall back on old habits, and I really would like to change that.” She tells the life coach about the comment that keeps being brought up and will never die, and the life coach asks “How much of what people say do you take personally?”
Tami explains that if it’s someone in her inner circle, she takes things very personally, so she definitely needs to have a conversation with Shaunie and Evelyn to get her feelings off her chest.
Tami makes a list of all the ways she can be set off, and she says that the wrong tone of voice is a big one, as is someone waving hands in her face. That, she says, is an association to her mother scolding her as a child and waving a finger in her face. “I was blown away by the realization that a lot of the way I handle people today is directly relative to my experiences in the past,” Tami said after her session.
“I am working on myself, but I am not Mother Theresa and I am not gonna lead you to the mountaintop. So. There will be those moments where if you push me, there’s the potential that the old Tami will pop back up and pop a bitch.”