Love & Hip Hop Atlanta Season 3 Premiere: Not Going To Entertain Your Shenanigans

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shenanigans1
A new season of Love & Hip Hop Atlanta. Y’all know what this show has done in the past, and in season three, they’ve managed to outdo themselves with marriages, babies, a sex tape and a shooting. What else is there??? Let’s get to all the shenanigans and rehash episode one. First, lets meet the Jordans.

Stevies White House
Ext. Stevie J.’s palatial new home, a.k.a. “The White House.”

“So many rooms, I can’t even count,” Stevie says in voiceover. But Stevie’s math shortcomings aside, what matters is that he and his beloved Puerto Rican Princess, Joseline Hernandez-Jordan is shacked up there with him. The Michelle to his Barack. Enter, Joseline.
Josleine Morning Daddy
“What’s up, daddy? You ready for breakfast?” she asks. And for once, that’s not a euphemism for sex.

Over eggs and champagne, Stevie and Joseline discuss their newleyweddedness, but Joseline doesn’t feel like much of a wifey. “It feels like we’re still dating,” she tells Stevie. Even though she feels that way, she defiantly tells us, “I AM Mrs. Jordan. This bitch is officially off the market.” One problem though: they got married at the courthouse, but Joseline still wants a big, white ceremony (presumably to match their big, white house). “Where’s my dress? Where’s my mamacitas with the flow-wers?”
Mamacitas
And as Joseline explains, “What the baddest bitch wants, the baddest bitch gets.”

Before they can plan a wedding though, Stevie has plans for their first joint-post-marital birthday party together. “Birthday par-ty! Birthday par-ty!” Joseline chants.
birthday-party-joseline
And with that, seems like Joseline and Stevie might be ready for more breakfast, and in this case, breakfast IS a euphemism for sex.

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