Kim Screws Up Her Face But Still Looks Hot

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Kim Kardashian‘s official website may just be the greatest spot on the web – ever. Unlike some of her “peers” who have PR flacks manage their internet homes, Kim seems to be entirely in charge of her domain. The site is saturated with pics of her posing in half naked, with Paris Hilton and of course flaunting her ass. Even better, she posts style tips on what bikini bottoms fit her butt best! But the best part is the blog she regularly updates with posts – like this recent one featuring her favorite screwy pics taken with her MacBook’s Photobooth program. Even though she ends up looking like LaToya Jackson in a lot of these pics, she’s still pretty hot. Lucky. [OfficialKimKardashian]

Suge Knight’s L.A. Ass Whooping

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Hey look – Suge Knight is still around doing what he does best – getting into trouble. The former hip-hop mogul allegedly got his ass kicked outside a Los Angeles nightclub this weekend, after he charged at some duding screaming “I want my money!” Suge grabbed him in a headlock, but the guy slipped out and clocked the Death Row founder in the face. Apparently Knight was on the ground for three minutes before he could walk away from the scene and headed to the hospital with the LAPD. TMZ has pics of Suge covered in blood, taken right after sh*t went down. He later refused to press charges against the guy, but if I were the culprit I’d look out. Suge wants his money, and knowing him, he’ll get it. [NYDN]

Kate Hudson is Not an Idiot

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Kate Hudson and Owen Wilson are not engaged, because Kate Hudson has above average brain power and is not gonna go down that road again. Her reps – and his – have both confirmed that “She’s definitely not engaged.” So calm down people! Just because she was spotted wearing a diamond ring doesn’t mean she’s heading down the aisle with that crazy Wilson bro. It means she is super.effing.rich. The end. [Us]

Nick Hogan Gets Eight Months in Prison

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Nick Hogan wore an expressionless face today as he was sentenced to eight months in prison for felony reckless driving that left his best friend, John Graziano, critically injured. He was also given five years of probation and 100 hours of community service for each year. Hulk Hogan and a weeping Brooke Hogan (who wore a shoulderless dress) addressed the court on Nick’s behalf, asking for leniency. But John’s mother, father, sister and girlfriend all lobbied for serious punishment. “I’m not seeking revenge,” said John’s mother. “Only justice.” John is expected to require lifelong care. Is Nick’s sentence fair? [Image: Getty]

It’s Her Body, Mischa Can Have Flab If She Wants To

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Mischa Barton is all upset about photos currently circulating that show her with some serious cellulite action on her thighs. We took a look at a recent pic of Mischa’s behind and found nothing to be ashamed of (girl looks amazing!), but even if she packing some heat on her backside – who cares? It’s her body – she can embrace it in whatever way she wants. Of course Mischa rep has chosen to complain to the gossip pages of the NY Daily News, alleging that it is Photoshop that’s making her look bad. Maybe she should hook up with Kim Kardashian for a cellulite-zapping double date?

Those photos are doctored. I’m not saying she’s perfect, nobody is. But they’ve given a 22-year-old woman the legs and bottom of an 80-year-old. Look at the shots that were taken shortly before on a beach in L.A. Did she develop all that cellulite in a couple of weeks? There’s a lot you can do with Photoshopping.”

LOST Recap: Hardcore Brain-Melter

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“Game-changer,” “mind-blower,” “brain melter” – all of these designations have been used to describe various episodes of LOST. Last night’s “Cabin Fever” was all of ‘em rolled together: a hit of crack with a human growth hormone chaser!

Claire knocks back some lemonade with Christian, Locke gets locke(d) in a locke(r), Richard Alpert continues recruiting for the island’s new quarterback, Ben got chocolate in Hurley’s peanut butter, Hurley got peanut butter in Ben’s chocolate, Horace Goodspeed from DHARMA is stuck in a time loop for his impact on the environment, Keamy becomes even less likable, the freighter doctor catches up with time, Sayid takes a dinghy ride on the open seas, and Frank Lapidus sends a special delivery to the beach. Let’s drill down a bit.

Read more…

Porn Star’s Spermathon Takes Sex to a Whole New Level

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In America, sex is not just something people do behind closed doors – it’s a revolution. VH1 is embracing our culture’s obsession with doin’ it in the new four-part documentary special Sex: The Revolution, which starts airing Monday at 10PM (after the kids are in bed, natch) and continues through Thursday. Consider the above clip a little visual foreplay for what’s to come. It features a porn star from back in the day who decided to take on the Guinness World Record for most sexual partners in one sitting. The magic number: 86. The result? The world’s first spermathon.

Kim Kardashian Uses Butt to Save Burma

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Oh.My.God. This is by far the best video we have seen all week, and we implore every single person on earth to watch it NOW. Kim Kardashian is an activist ya’ll, and she and her sisters have made a video educating us stupid folk about the oppressive military regime in Burma (aka Myanmar). Seriously. Kim spends just as much time reciting facts about the country (recently hit by a devastating cyclone) as she does looking at herself in the mirror. It’s classic Kardashian! Let’s hope she gave some of that sex tape money to the Burmese people who need her help. [Official Kim Kardashian]

If you are inspired and want to donate to help the Burmese people affected by the recent cyclone disaster, check out the U.S. Campaign for Burma or MercyCorps.

Beyonce’s Kid Clothes Perfect for Trashy Tots

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Here’s the latest in clothes for girls from Beyonce and her mother’s fashion line, House of Dereon. These threads are definitely going to be a hit, as there’s certainly not a lot of heels or boas out there on the market for four year olds. Aren’t all moms out there desperate for a way to skank up their tots, Pussycat Dolls style? I think so!

So go ahead youngin’s – grab that leopard print had, slip into your heels and that sexy denim outfit, and jam it out that piano you don’t yet know how to play. You look so damn hot, no one will even notice. [DListed]

LiLo Kicked Off Film, Celebrates Over Tequila with LC

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lindsay.jpgRemember how Lindsay Lohan – that super-talented spoiled brat – was going to redeem her fallen acting career in a new flick about Charlie Manson and his followers? We’ll it ain’t gonna happen, because no other actor would agree to work with the redhead! According to blogger Nikki Finke, “Lohan quickly became more of a deficit than an asset when they discovered that they couldn’t find any name actresses who wanted to co-star with her. (And even some name actors…)”

Hahaha! Ha. As Finke points out, us gossip hags may love LiLo’s drama, but people in the biz won’t stand for it. Too bad she never learned that life lesson in one of her three rehab stints. And even the benefits of her treatment seem to be wearing off, as she was spotted sneaking tequila shots with Hills ringleader Lauren Conrad. Drowning her career sorrows, perhaps?