For no other reason than sheer hilarious cuteness, we present you this video of an extremely fat cat from Japan. This cat is so fat that he can’t scratch his own ear. According to the rough translation of the audio at Daily Motion, the cat’s name is Papi Chan. He’s as heavy as a two-year-old baby. He’s so lazy that he relaxes when his owner gives him a shower — even though cats hate water. His owner is worried about the cat’s weight and health, and so decides to force him to exercise. As the mangled translation reads:
“Papi chan wont ever move, even when there is a ‘neko jarashii’ (a cat toy) he will only look at it.. He will really not move! if he will stay like this, it is worrysome.. DIET STRATEGY! First is the Pet running machine, this way it can be done easily, let’s try it! It looks not like running machine, but now a pet conveyer! Wow! He Moved! Oh.. He runs away.. Billy’s Boot Camp! Papi chan’s reaction.. wow, he’s watching, he’s watching! Then, his neck begin to move.. Good job! Then with just moving the neck.. he falls asleep.”
Seriously, watch until the cat is on the treadmill. You will not be sorry.
More Japanese fat cats after the jump.
It’s Friday, which means it’s the perfect day to enjoy this video of a tiny baby holding a guitar and busting out The Beatles song “Hey Jude.” We have no idea how the kid, named Hero, has such a good grasp on the lyrics at such a young age, but it’s a pretty solid rendition coming from someone still in diapers. Most importantly, it’s straight up adorable. Enjoy.
Ashley Tisdale: Keeping Her Small Boobs, For Now
A fake nose is enough plastic for this pop tart, thank you very much! [Us]
Nelly Furtado’s Not Knocked Up
What, just because J. Lo does something, everyone has to do it? [Us]
Bai Ling Babbles Online About Arrest
The actress’ heart “feels sad” after being busted for stealing mags from an airport shop. [Us]
Pam Strips for Paris
America may be sick of her, but Paris (the city, not the skank) loves Pam, who performed a striptease at the infamous Le Crazy Horse saloon. [People]
Madonna’s Directorial Debut Dissed
The singer’s new film is getting bashed by critics. When is she gonna realize that movies just ain’t her thing? [NYDN]
Dr. Drew’s weekly commentary on Celebrity Rehab continues! After the jump, the hardest-working doctor in showbiz talks Friends & Family Weekend, Jeff’s empty promises, Brigitte’s triggering and why he thinks Vikki’s portrayal on the show is unfair.
Poor little Heidi from The Hills lost it when she discovered people on the internet were saying mean things about her budget music video for her song “Higher!” Has she just now discovered what the world wide web is all about? The wannabee singer claimed that she “started sobbing uncontrollably,” after discovering the disses, and cried herself to sleep. There is a very simple solution to all of this – don’t put garbage on the web. Stop posing for staged pictures on the beach in nothing but a string bikini. Don’t get “engaged” to your devil boyfriend on a reality TV show. Don’t make a PG-rated sex tape and stick it up on the internet. Easy!
Heidi claims the video was just a spur of the moment thing. “We did it in one take, maybe two, and it took us 20 minutes to film and cost us zero dollars,” she said. That right there is a sign to never show it to anyone, ever. Hopefully the plastic princess has learned her lesson and will find a way to make it big without big mistakes. After all, she’s “just a 21-year-old from a small town in Colorado trying to follow her dreams.” [Us]
The American Idol train is racing towards the station, and now there’s no turning back. Hollywood has been the tantalizing almost-realization of a dream for some, but of course, only a fraction of those can make Idol’s opening 24, so for all but 12 lucky men and 12 lucky women, the road ends here.
The momentum Idol has built, from its voluminous transcontinental auditions and its pre-qualifying week of Hollywood hell, has got to come to a brief and entirely missable halt, while Simon, Randy, and Paula do the dirty work of weeding out the unfit, the off-key, and the lame. Last night’s was a housekeeping episode, only slightly enlivened by the cringe-inducing elevator camera taping hopefuls’ excruciating moments on their way to, and returning from, their moments of truth. The format was simple: three judges, an uncomfortable-looking chair, and enough pressure to crack even a seasoned mobster. As aspiring Idols were called before the tribunal, a seemingly endless parade of bodies flashed over the screen, some weeping with joy or dejection, some accepting their fates — whatever they may be — with rock-star cool.
Rock of Love 2 is heating up! Last week the girls tested their aptitude with nuts and bolts in a custom motorcycle build off. Get caught up here and tell us which ladies are safe and who will be dismissed next episode.
Aubry was kicked off last episode. Did you forecast her fall?
Fallen, but not forgotten
Watch Rock of Love 2 Sunday, 9PM EST.
Rock of Love 2 Show Page
Now that Britney’s baby sister Jamie-Lynn is knocked up, sources are coming out and flinging some serious mud in the teen’s direction. We’ve watched enough Gossip Girl to know how vicious kids can be, but this stuff is downright dirty, which makes it that much more interesting. If these sources are telling the truth, Jamie-Lynn is already following in her sister’s dangerous footsteps. She’s got the partying and the promiscuity down, now all she needs is a couple of vag-flashes! Soon enough.
Accusation #1: Jamie-Lynn gets around
A source accuses J-L of getting busy with a few boys (in addition to her baby-daddy Casey Aldridge), saying, “I know for a fact that Casey was not the first guy she slept with — or the last. There were at least two others. I know that 110 percent.”
Accusation #2: She’s using her pregnancy as birth control
A different source allegedly spotted Jamie-Lynn trying to get with a guy (not her boyfriend Casey) with this pick-up line: “It’s cool; I’m pregnant. I can’t get pregnant again!”
Accusation #3: She took to the bottle to forget Britney
Even though she’s only 16, J-L is supposedly way beyond experimenting with booze. She’s drinking to forget about her family drama! “Some people drink to have a good time,” revealed another underage spy. “But she drank to get wrecked. She drank to get messed up and forget about her mother, her sister and all of that.” [MSNBC]
Hillary Clinton wants your votes. Here’s a little Valentine’s Day treat for anyone on the fence. Enjoy.
Click here if you prefer old school Clinton.
Bai, Bai, Bai. If you’re gonna steal something, how about some decent outfits? The actress was caught pocketing two magazines and some batteries at an airport gift shop yesterday in Los Angeles. An employee of the store placed Ling under citizen’s arrest (bad ass!) until the cops arrived. Seriously, do not f*ck with those airport shop clerks – you don’t even wanna know what they’ll do if you try to steal a neck pillow. Bai was then taken by airport police and booked for her crime. She was described as “cooperative but crying.” There’s no word on what she was wearing, but we’re going to guess it was minimal and atrocious. Perhaps the fashion police would be better equipped to handle her case?
Bai has even blogged pics of her time in the airport. There’s no mention of the arrest, just pics of her sitting around and this small post, “Life is a sad song sometime but still sings the beauty for their loved ones……”
Hottie of the Week: Bai Ling