On the Seventh Day, Jack Bauer Could Not Rest

by

Bless the fine culture purveyors over at NYMag.com. Not only did they steer us to the leaked version of the shooting script for Paul Thomas Anderson‘s latest filmyou cinephiles out there will be pleased to learn There Will Be Blood stars Daniel Day-Lewis, and early word back is that it’s amaaaaazing – they posted the British trailer for season 7 of 24. (Why the British trailer? It’s classier that way!) Anyhow, it seems that Jack Bauer‘s next daylong adventure involves congressional subcommittees, torture and the return of Tony Almeida. From the trailer, Tony looks like he either drank the Kool-Aid or was exposed to that nasty Kryptonite from Superman III. You’d probably be in a bad mood, too, if your love interest had been toasted in a car explosion and you’d “died” after being injected with a fictional pain-causing drug. But would your spirits be low enough to mount a terrorist attack? The show won’t return until January, so get your fix from the trailer having. We’re having a Jack attack. Right. Now.

Who Are the Five Unsexiest Women Alive?

by

That glorious mens rag Maxim has named the following ladies The Five Unsexiest Women Alive:

5. Britney Spears
4. Madonna
3. Sandra Oh
2. Amy Winehouse
1. Sarah Jessica Parker

Sarah Jessica has a horse face! Brit’s gained “23 pounds of Funyun pudge!” Yeah we get it – some ladies aren’t Megan Fox and therefore deserve what little self worth they have left shredded to bits with hackneyed, overused phrases. It’s a good thing they have their millions to cry into! Also – Sandra Oh? Really? We get Britney, but Oh was totally bangin’ back in Sideways. Get with it. We thought the original list could use some real, hardcore unsexiness, so here’s our go at it. What do you think?

5. anncoulter2.jpg Ann Coulter

Read more…

Blog Best-Of: Christina’s Coloring

by

christina_links.jpg- Here’s a funny correlation: the more pregnant Christina Aguilera gets, the more bronzer she puts on. It’s pumpkin-chic and it’s just in time for Halloween! [Jezebel]

- The Notorious B.I.G. wax figure debuts. He loves it when you call him “Big Paraffin.” [Crunk + Disorderly]

- Christina Ricci used to make a habit out of displaying her nipples at film premieres. In retrospect, this was the beginning of the end for her. [CityRag]

- A bear comes forward and claims that he had sex with Larry Craig. So now he’s gay and into animals?!? [Dlisted]

- Marie Osmond blogs about fainting on Dancing With the Stars. She’s really gonna have a hell of a time topping it next week. [Seriously? OMG! WTF?]

[Image: Getty]

Japan Makes Potty Training Adorable

by

I’m not so sure potty-training videos even exist here in the good ol’ US of A, but if there is such a thing it probably involve puppets and a singing acapella group. You know, something that gives you that creepy vibe even though it’s meant for two-year olds. But our friends across the globe in Japan have come up with this joyous, adorable (and easy!) cartoon of a cat family that loves to pee and poop together, to help train kids on when and where to go. It’s giggle-tastic – and pretty ridiculous. As much as I love the hyper-celebratory cartoon (and the smiling poop who loves getting flushed down the toilet), the part at the end with the actual kid is just straight up uncool. This video is gonna come back to haunt him in about ten years, and he’ll probably get his head shoved in some toilet by bullies as punishment for his childhood acting cred. Not sure if that’s ironic, but it’ll definitely suck.

Britney’s Secret Diary Revealed!

by

britneyspears102507.jpgJust what we’ve been waiting for – the secret diary of Miss Britney Spears! Apparently lil’ miss collagen lips had herself a private journal, but got sick of it and tossed it in the trash – right next to her old puppy BitBit. Never fear, her wonderful friend Sam Lufti apparently dug it up and is shopping it around for $2 million. The asking price seems ridiculous, though she does allegedly dish on her drug habits! Oh, what we wouldn’t give to have that book in our hands. Sam did let us have a sneak peek, however – and here’s one page we were able to pull.

britneyspearsdiary.jpg

Related Content
news_20×915.gifBritney Spears Lives in Her Own World
news_20×915.gifBritney’s Best Day Ever!
news_20×915.gifBritney’s Blackout: Early Reviews Are In

How Many Steve Carells Are There?

by

carrel.jpg

He was a once a mailman. A long time ago, he wanted to be a lawyer. And he started his film career with – don’t be a hater - Curly Sue. But Steve Carell has made up for all that. These days he’s a 40-year-old virgin, nimrod office boss, and, if you can believe it, Maxwell Smart. As of tomorrow and the arrival of Dan in Real Life, he’s also a schlub with family problems, just like alot of us. We corralled a bunch of Carell trivia for you, and these movie clips should help you decide if you’re down with Dan.
What’s your favorite Carell character, Michael Scott or one of his big screen guys?

Halle Berry is One Good Lookin’ Mama

by

hallea.jpgWell played Ms. Berry, well played. Your sultry appearance in world’s most amazing blue dress has almost made me forget all about your awkward “Jewish cousin comment.” Bravo! Halle looked beyond ravishing at the London premiere of her new Oscar-buzzin’ flick Things We Lost in the Fire, and is a walking advertisement for all the pregnant ladies in the house. I’m pretty sure if all us ladies could all walk around looking 4 months preggers like Halle, we would. Everything is workin’ in all the right places. Does she even have a bad place?

Check out more of Halle’s hotness below. Try not to drool!

[All Images: Getty]

Tommy Lee: Too Smart for Rock of Love

by

tommy_lee_rock_of_love2.gif

The idea of appearing on a reality dating show does not turn Tommy Lee on. According to MTV News, in a recent newsletter, Tommy cleared up those rumors that he’d be the center of an upcoming season of Rock of Love:

I am not, nor would I ever, do a stupid show like the Rock of Love.

Yes, yes. Tommy Lee is way too sophisticated for that. His on-screen offerings generally involve high-brow situations like having extremely vocal sex with Pamela Anderson or eating testicles on his not-at-all-stupid 2005 reality series Tommy Lee Goes to College.

<:tommyleeballs::e>

Take that, Bret Michaels! [MTV News]

About Last Night: Ultra Fresh Party Pics

by

Movie premieres, awards shows, benefit concerts, and plain old clubbin’ – even though most of us are at home, the beautiful peeps are living it up somewhere. About Last Night puts you in touch with all the action.

Katie Holmes accompanied her vertically challenged husband, Tom Cruise, to the German premiere of Lions for Lambs.

Halle Berry looked amazing at the UK premiere of her latest film, Things We Lost in the Fire.

Steve Carell, Dane Cook, Juliette Binoche, and most of The Office cast (including Jenna Fischer and Melora Hardin, pictured above) attended the premiere of Dan in Real Life.