Monday: Paris Hilton Doesn’t Do Chicks

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parishilton0204.jpgCam Diaz’s Dance Off
The awkward actress got into it on the dance floor with a fellow patron of a NYC club. Where’s Drew Barrymore when you need back up on jazz hands? [NYP]

Katharine McPhee Married at 23
So what if she didn’t win Idol – we don’t see Taylor Hicks walking down the aisle! In fact, we don’t see Taylor Hicks anywhere. Kat wins! [People]

Sam Lutfi Talks Sh*t About Brit’s Fam
What a surprise – Brit’s creepy pal is bashing her parents to the press, calling them crazy. When it comes to that drama, who around Britney is actually sane? [Us]

Michelle Williams Talks About Heath
The actress breaks our hearts with this statement about her “heartbroken” state following Heath’s death. [Us]

Paris Hilton: “I’m not gay!”
World to Paris: “We don’t care!” [TMZ]

The Celebreality Interview – Angelique

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“I’m very open so you can ask me anything!” Angelique told us prior to interviewing her. Duh! After the jump, Rock of Love 2‘s stripper with a heart of…something gives us a glimpse into her life as a dancer in Vegas, tells us what she really thinks of Bret, dishes about plastic surgery and sends a message to the haters: “If you don’t like me, don’t look at me.” That is, of course, assuming you’re able to tear your eyes away from her.

(Note: The interview below is only lightly edited for clarification: Angelique’s French approach to English is alive and well and most grammatical mistakes are a reflection on her singular style of speaking.)

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LOST Returns: Never Say Never, Dude

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Lost finally returned from hiatus with an episode that helped bridge the gap from last season’s focus on “The Others,” while dropping enough nuclear mind bombs to keep us fans buzzing all week. Below the jump we bust out some of the new things we learned, ponder a couple confusing twists, and revel in the stuff that got our panties all up in a bunch. Hit the Comments section to tell us your theories about this episode and share the moments that had you on your feet.

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Kim Kardashian: Not Desperate, Annoying

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kimface.jpgHey everyone, gather round! Are you listening? Taking notes? Snapping pictures? Good. Kim Kardashian wants and needs your attention. She’s talking about an important, relevant issue: her stupid sex tape that for some reason won’t die. “I’m not poor, I’m not desperate, I would never try to sell a sex tape,” she says. “It would humiliate me and my family. I don’t need the money. It’s something I feel very betrayed by, but I’m not pointing any fingers.”

But why not just stop talking about the thing, then? Ah, that would mean that we might forget about Kim, and who on earth would want to do that? Never fear, Kim is hard at work trying to make it at this whole “famous for nothing” biz. When not sitting on her boyfriend’s lap, here’s what she’s up too: “I also model and I’m taking acting and singing classes. I work very hard.”

Yes, she puts Mother Teresa to shame with all her . Check out some pics of Kim working very hard below, while we work hard not to barf. [Getty]

Last Night’s Pics: Jessica Alba & Hayden Panettiere

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Movie premieres, awards shows, benefit concerts, and plain old clubbin’ – even though most of us are at home, the beautiful peeps are living it up somewhere. Last Night’s Pics puts you in touch with all the action.

A visibly pregnant Jessica Alba strolled the red carpet at the premiere of her spookster flick, The Eye, alongside fiance Cash Warren and costar Alessandro Nivola.

The Cinema Society hosted a screening of “Marc Jacobs & Louis Vuitton,” attracting a slew of fashion-conscious celebs. Guests included Heidi Klum, Naomi Lenoir, Sophia Bush, Anne Hathaway, Marc Jacobs, Rachel Zoe, Ellen Pompeo, and Padma Lakshmi.

The red carpet at the premiere of The Spiderwick Chronicles was an eclectic mix of cute kids and drunken old dudes. Hayden Panettiere & brother Jansen did the red carpet thing with fellow cutie Freddie Highmore. On the other end of the carpet, Nick Nolte and son, Brawley, sort of looked like they stumbled into the wrong party. Martin Short was also spotted at the premiere. Nolte & Short both have supporting roles in the film, making us slightly less creeped out.

Britney Spears’ Contagious Craziness

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As if what’s happening in the Spears household wasn’t bad enough, now it seems that whatever’s wrong with the deposed pop princess might be catching. In terrifying news for people who fly in planes, an Air Canada flight from Toronto to London had to be diverted to Ireland on Tuesday because the co-pilot apparently suffered a nervous breakdown. According to reports, he was dragged screaming from the cockpit and placed into restraints. As one passenger told the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation: “His voice was clear so he didn’t sound drunk or anything. He was swearing and asking for God and very distressed. He basically said he wanted to talk to God.” Couple that with the news of Jamie Lynn’s pregnancy and even news about Eva Mendes’ rehab visit, and we think we’ve identified a trend. Crazy: No longer reserved for full-moons only.