I Love New York 2 Recap – Episode 1 – Big Boobs, Little Man

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Ah, New York’s back, and it’s as though she never left. Everything feels so familiar! Oh, wait…is that because the opening footage on this first episode is the same opening footage we saw on the first episode last time around?

No matter. The boobs are bigger, the hair is nicer, the men are hotter and the weirdness is…weirder.

For example, say hello to my little friend:

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He’s shy at first, but he really opens up once you get to know him.

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Tila Tequila Seduces MTV

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Oh, Tila. You are the queen of the Internets, the Maharani of MySpace, the raison d’etre behind MTV’s most gripping program since Johnny Knoxville unwisely lit out for the brighter (?) lights of B-movie tripe. You have won our hearts, our souls, and, more recently, our eyeballs.

Tonight your show debuts. We are counting the minutes. Every second seems a smelly, unreasonable eternity. We should explain: We will be watching A Shot at Love With Tila Tequila very, very closely, for we will be recapping the show here at the VH1 Blog. We will thrill to the sight of your bisexual dating program, wherein men (if you can call them that) and women (whose average mien appears influenced by and promotional of Human Growth Hormone and the San Fernando Valley) compete for your affections.

It is, we say, an historical moment. We have been waiting far too long. So, apparently, have certain frothy elements of the culture, whose right-wing sensibilities and conservative spending habits have been offended by your young, lithe, nubile, tanned . . . er, ambitions. We are proud to see you taking a stand for diversity — not to mention dignity, a staple that’s lately gone missing from the larder — on your MySpace blog. You write:

“Ever since the announcement of my new TV show(about being bisexual) I know that it has raised quite the controversy…especially with the conservatives, but even more recently, THE CHRISTIAN CHURCH!!! They have made it clear that what I am doing is wrong and that I am ‘cooperating with the adversary’ It’s ridiculous!”

Oh, Tila. At VH1, we would never assume you were colluding with Satan.

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Marc Anthony’s Ex Talks J. Lo’s Bun, Oven

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J. LoThough J. Lo is keeping tight-lipped on the subject of her pregnancy (see: taciturn appearances on TRL, Good Morning America), there’s someone else who isn’t: husband Marc Anthony‘s ex-wife. Perezhilton.com is reporting that Anthony’s ex, and the mother of his two children, granted an interview with the Spanish-language media during which the former Miss Universe reportedly sniffed, “I suppose they’ll be very happy together.” Lopez’s probable pregnancy has been the source of much speculation since the singer started wearing lose fitting clothing and tented dresses.

And speaking of J. Lo’s recent closet criticism, check out the looks she’s sported throughout her career — from Fly Girl to Mrs. Marc Anthony, and everything in between.

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Lindsay Reveals All After Rehab

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lilo108.jpgIt’s kind of unclear where exactly Lindsay Lohan is at the moment – but one thing’s for certain, she is NOT at rehab. The actress has transitioned out of Cirque Lodge and is currently in a “non-residential program” in Utah where she will continue her treatment before heading off to shoot her new movie Dare to Love Me. Next stop after that – back to Utah for more rehab luv! Linds has already started blabbing about her new self in the latest issues of OK! and In Touch. The girl gives the same ol’ story of every other rehabilitated starlet (remember Paris’ pile of BS after jail?). To summarize:

New boyfriend, didn’t sleep with old guy, cleaned common area, never going to night clubs again, real friends don’t pressure me to go out, hit rock bottom, going to Africa, love siblings, Karma is a bitch, I am woman hear me roar. Also I am a genius-super talented-God’s gift to the earth actor. So there.

Check out pics of Lilo’s new 25-year old snowboarder boyfriend Riley and enjoy personal rehab pics taken by Lindsay herself. And yeah, we wish the newly clean starlet the best. [Perez Hilton/DListed. Image: Getty]

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Hottie of the Week: New York

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Photo_20x9_1 Sexy New York Pics

Just like the city she is nicknamed after, New York is exciting, loud, sexy, fast, electric, flashy, bold and just a little bit crazy. Which is why the entire world can’t get enough of her and her on-screen antics. Ms. Tiffany Pollard has already flaunted her goods – and her sass – on two seasons of Flavor of Love as well as on her own hit, I Love New York. After Tango broke her heart (and their engagement) she restarted her hunt in I Love New York 2 for someone who can not only win her love – but someone who deserves it. Regardless of how her quest turns out, we confess our allegiance – she’s the Head B*tch in Charge of our hearts.


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Rocking the Reunion One Last Time

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Check out some additional pictures that weren’t included in our behind-the-scenes look at the Rock of Love reunion. There’s a girls-putting-their-faces-on motif below — those faces don’t paint themselves!

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Britney’s Behind the Bar, Ya’ll!

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brit109.jpgWe can not – must not – try to understand or explain the insane life choices of Britney Spears. Instead all we can do is sit and watch and marvel. And now, we can have her make us a drink too! Yes, Brit is desperate for a career change, and last week the starlet applied to be a BARTENDER at the Cameo Bar at LA’s Viceroy Hotel. Filled out an application and everything. You know – to be someone who serves customers drinks and listens to their problems. Right up her alley, obviously.

This is the perfect job for a washed-up millionaire mom of two. She probably even has a signature drink she wants you to enjoy! Her recipe:

Britney’s Night Out in a Glass

  • 5 shots of generic, cheap house vodka
  • 1 squirt of Coca Cola
  • 7 packets Taco Bell Border Sauce – Hot Flavor
  • Shaken, not stirred
  • Two Marlboro Light Menthol cigarettes crumbled on top as garnish (it’s minty ya’ll!)
  • ENJOY!

[Image: Getty]

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Style Watch: Smartest Model‘s Mary Alice Stephenson Behind the Scenes

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Mary Alice Stephenson is the co-host of America’s Most Smartest Model, the game show where chiseled specimens of humanity compete to discredit a musty pop-culture cliche: that pretty people are dumb. (Guess what? They’re not.)

We caught up with Mary Alice after the premiere to learn the inside dope on what went down, and to get her take on style in general. Interview after the jump.

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Yep, It’s Bret!

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Last month’s announcement of open calls for Rock of Love 2 kicked off widespread speculation on which rocker would rule the house — names like Tommy Lee, Mark McGrath and Dave Navarro batted around the Internet buzz. Now, the VH1 Blog exclusively can reveal that Rock of Love 2 will star none other than Bret Michaels, who’s ready to give reality TV dating another shot after things fizzled with Rock of Love winner Jes.

Expect more girls (20, to be exact), more challenges, more turn-ons and more diabeetus in the second season of Rock of Love, which is coming…well, sooner than you might think!

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Tuesday: Nicole’s Barefoot & Pregnant Down Under

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nicole1009.jpgNicole Rocks Bikini in Australia
Is it wrong to hate a pregnant woman for looking better in bikinis than you do? [Just Jared]

Britney Finally Sees Her Sons
The boys and a parenting coach came to Brit’s house for a visit – so she waddled around her yard yapping on a cell phone while the children played. Daddy – help! [NYDN]

Lily Allen: Hypnotized to Get Skinny
The singer was hypnotized into enjoying exercise and eating. Because how else could you get her to do anything? [Us Weekly]

Tom Cruise’s Cursed Film
Much of the film for Tommy’s new movie about a German soldier is unusable and must be shot again. Let’s see Scientology save ya now, buddy! [People]

Foxy Pens Song in the Slammer
Look out! Foxy’s pissed at a certain NY newspaper and is taking her threats to the page. Good thing she’s gonna be locked up for a while. [NY Post]