Blog Best-Of: Prince’s Pissiness

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prince_links.jpg- Prince goes after fansite operators for copyright infringement. Clearly, he has not had his plus sign 2 day. [SOULBOUNCE.com]

- Taye Diggs discovers geek chic. Or maybe he’s just bringing the early ’90s back. Either way: BAD. DECISION. [Dlisted]

- Jennifer Lopez doesn’t have a baby bump, she has a baby basketball. Seriously. Now I feel like she’s just playing with us. It’s a pick-up game, but a game nonetheless. [Crunk + Disorderly]

- Alyssa Milano demands that a website retract its claim that she’s had Botox. You know, there is a huge difference between Botox and Restylane. Keep up, people! [CityRag]

- Is Pete Doherty using again? Is blow white? [Seriously? OMG! WTF?]

Image credit: Getty

Gotti’s Word – Episode 4

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Irv Gotti has a lot of explaining to do, and explain he does: every week he gives us blow-by-blow commentary on the latest episode of Gotti’s Way. After the jump, Irv talks about DMX’s wife Tashera, signing Vanessa Carlton, hobnobbing with “talent,” and what he means when he says, “Compromise doesn’t work.”

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Akon Dumped By (Almost) Wife #4

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akon-rachel.jpgWe can’t get enough of these gems from an interview with Rachel Ritfield, the woman who was to be Akon‘s fourth wife. Sadly, when push came to shove, the model just couldn’t force herself to walk down the aisle with the polygamous rapper. Rachel said, “I want a man who thinks that I’m God’s gift to creation and I can think the same of him.” Well then what was she doing with Akon in the first place? Isn’t he a notorious man ho? Apparently dry-humping underage fans can really turn a woman on. Rachel was not freaked out by the whole plural marriage thing at first, claiming “Akon was honest with me about his mutiple wives from the start, which never got in the way of our relationship because his wives live in various parts of the world, so I thought why fix it if it’s not broken?”

Fix what? Our culture’s attitude toward men who marry multiple women? Akon’s screwy relationships? Sadly, Rachel didn’t get the hint until Akon had kid number five with one of his wifeys. Rachel finally realized that Akon was still boning other chicks even though he acted like she was the only piece of ass in his life, and she bailed. “The one thing I wanted from Akon was for him to be monogamous to me but he could not grant me my wish,” she lamented.

Hang in there girl! There are plenty of other creepy-ass rich dudes just yearning for a hot model like yourself. You’ll get your wish! [Image: Rachel's MySpace]

Britney Sells a Whole Lotta Albums

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By Guest Blogger Britney J. Spears

Take that, ya’ll! All you people said that just because I have stains on my shirt and eat Taco Bell for every meal and wear the same boots every day that my career was over, but guess what, it ain’t! Ha! My new album is at the top of the charts this week because I am sexy and awesome. I’ve sold 325,000 copies so far. That’s like, a big city of people! That’s probably as many people as in New York, or Disney World, or China! I am awesome! So awesome that I can park in handicapped parking, ya’ll! And it’s not because my acne counts as a handicap (even thought it should), it’s because I park where I feel like, and I don’t care I’m screwing someone who can’t walk out of a parking spot. I’m Britney, you handicapped b*tches!

Next time ya’ll feel like dissin’ me, just remember who is selling a butt load of albums without doing any promotional work for it whatsoever. No tour, no photoshoots, no nothing! I’ll I gotta do is hawk some perform and mess up my kids and you people fawn all over me freaking out. The joke is on you! Oh – that would make a really good album name. I gotta write that in my dream journal. Now if you’ll excuse me, my Hot Pockets are ready and I think I hear my dog barking. Oh – that’s Sean Preston. Oops.

Shakira: Exclusive Live Performance!

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Only a handful of performers exist in the hallowed first-name-only hall of fame, but Colombian bombshell Shakira proves her status in this exclusive clip from her upcoming Oral Fixation Tour DVD, out on November 13th. Find out which beloved hit Shakira powerfully performs. Get your lighters out!

Smartest Model‘s Mary Alice Stephenson: Sneaky V.J., Lisa’s Brain Power & Piglet Dissection

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Mary Alice Stephenson, co-host of America’s Most Smartest Model, is a fashion industry insider whose smart looks and smart tongue control her show’s pretty people. Each week we talk with her about issues on the show. This time the subjects are Lisa’s age, V.J.’s sneaky-sneaky behavior, and how science class adds up to big-time revulsion. Interview after the jump.

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The Hills: Audrina Needs Fashion Help; Heidi Celebrates Her B-Day Without Lauren

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It doesn’t matter if Audrina, token brunette of The Hills, is talking about going to try to sign a band or the conflict in the Middle East. Everything that comes out of her mouth just sounds like sweet ol’ boringness. It’s a good thing she wears t-shirts as dresses to keep people – Justin Bobby, Hot Guy From Indie Band, Lauren, America – interested!

Below the jump we marvel at Whitney’s (lack of) brain power, Spencer’s gift buying skills, and Audrina and Justin’s matching outfits. Hills heaven awaits!

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Mr. Zep’s Busted Pinky On the Mend

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If you’re a hard rock fan, you now know that Jimmy Page’s recently fractured finger has pushed back the date of the much buzzed-about Led Zeppelin reunion. Ouch for him and ouch for fans who’d made travel plans to go to London in late November. The show’s current date is December 10, and last night, while accepting a lifetime recognition from the Classic Rock Awards in London, the superstar told reporters how his left pinky was hurt when he stumbled over a stone slab in his garden – at least there wasn’t a bustle in his hedgerow. The ever-popular guitarist’s finger was bandaged. Here’s what he said about the fall in a formal statement last Friday.
Page also mentioned that fans can expect the group to play “a lot of the songs that people really want to hear” at the upcoming show. I wonder which one he’s refering to? If you’d like to suggest some, or WIN TIX TO THE SHOW, make the jump and weigh in.

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Courtney Pulls Eminem, Cleans Out Closet

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courtney_loveA few months back, Courtney Love was reportedly planning an auction of deceased husband Kurt Cobain‘s possessions. Now the Widow Love has decided to clean out her own closet before selling her collection of flannel. According to the Lucky magazine blog, Ms. Love is auctioning off almost 150 pieces, with 10% of the proceeds going to L.A. homeless charity Chrysalis. So what can we expect to see from alterna-rock’s answer to Yoko Ono? Here’s what we think Love might be unloading:

47 pairs of ripped stockings
5 lipstick smeared babydoll dresses
Steve Coogan’s pajama bottoms
13 broken barrettes
1 Smashing Pumpkins t-shirt from their 1990 tour
Frances Bean