Michael Lohan, a recovering addict
who’s training to be a drug counselor, is blabbing that his baby girl
is trying to kick not just alcohol and blow, but OxyContin. Takes one
to know one, I guess. Hey, Daddy-Lo, didn’t you hear your kid’s
tear-filled jam "Confessions Of A Broken Heart"? She’s still mad about
that whole "screwed your family, got sent to jail" thing and wants you
to leave her alone! Unless, of course, you know where she could get
some of that prescription drug deliciousness. Then you should
definitely give her a call.
And Linds isn’t alone in her crisis. Famous pals have got her back. Find out who after the jump!
Paula Abdul’s most obvious addiction isn’t to alcohol or drugs — it’s to denying that she’s addicted to alcohol and drugs. The lady’s protesting is of Shakespearean proportions. Once again, she’s spoken out on the widespread allegations, this time to OK! magazine:
"I’m sick of it – I’ve never been drunk, and I don’t do recreational drugs."
In case you need reminding why everyone in the world is convinced that Paula is loaded with toxins that would kill elephants, watch this video or this video or this video or this video or, everyone’s favorite, this video:
David Hyde Pierce Officially Out Frasier’s favorite brother took a
tentative step out of the closet, after an article referring to his partner, Brian Hargrove, got tongues
wagging. [US Magazine]
K-Fed Joins Cast Of Keanu Reeves Thriller Gold-digging back up
dancer Kevin Federline will play a "small but notable" role" in the Matrix star’s new thriller, Night Watch . Hopefully his
extra background work will last longer than his marriage to Britney. [Hollywood.com]
Marilyn Manson, King of the Goths, returns with a new record next Tuesday. In advance of its release he’s doing all sorts of funny promotion, like divorcing his stripper wife, humping his barely legal girlfriend and covering Justin Timberlake songs. Now he’s even doing stand-up. Just kidding. Sort of. In this bizarre video, Manson discusses Lindsay Lohan‘s vaginal grooming. Hmm. Is Marilyn someone you’d let near your swimsuit area with a razor?
News about American Idol wannabe Kelly Clarkson‘s feud with her label head, Clive Davis, continues to surface. The New York Post reports that the Grand Old Man of pop is furious that Clarkson isn’t listening to his suggestions about her music. We, on the other hand, have begun thinking that the lady doth protest too much. Frankly, if Clive Davis wanted to shut Kelly Clarkson down, he could. (To paraphrase Cliff Huxtable, he gave Kelly life . . . and he can take it away.) Since he hasn’t, we’re forced to assume that all this strife might all be a media stunt. In which case, it is you, dear public, who suffers.
- Rihanna is certified perfect and if you disagree, you’re probably blind. Ella. Ella. Ella. Hey, hey, hey. [Crunk + Disorderly]
- The now-iconic pictures of Lindsay Lohan passed out in the front seat of an SUV get defaced in a hilarious feature called “Stuff on My Lohan.” It’s amazing what Photoshop can do to bring out your inner frat boy. [CityRag]
- In other Lindsay news, her (former?) man Callum Best has been caught with his pants down, snorting drugs off hookers. Look, buddy, Lindsay Lohan is the only hooker you should be snorting drugs off. And don’t you forget it! [Best Week Ever]
- After George Michael was found slumped over the wheel of his car in October, sleeping medication, an anti-depressant, GHB and cannabis were found in his system. Sounds like quite the party – what’s the problem? [Towleroad]
- LL Cool J has a nip slip, but will he become the scapegoat that Janet Jackson did? Doubtful. That’s sexist America for you! [Bossip]
Just one day after admitting she hit rock bottom, a vomit-covered Britney Spears had to be dragged out of the men’s bathroom at a Los Angeles hot spot. The rehabbed young mother apparently apologized by saying, "I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Things aren’t going well for me at the moment." It’s doubtful that Britney meant for her "comeback" to include stumbling around dripping in her own puke. So I gotta ask: is her sobriety back on the skids or did the pop princess eat something toxic?
The LiLo-palooza train-wreck shows no sign of slowing down. Yesterday Lindsay Lohan did what everyone was hoping and checked herself into the Promises treatment center in Malibu. After being driven to the detox palace by her lawyer, Lindsay’s people released an "official statement", asking for some privacy so she can kick her bad habits in peace. What they really mean is: LEAVE GIRLFRIEND THE HELL ALONE, ALREADY!
Pretty Paris Heaved From Heiress Book
Editors of an upcoming photo book of beautiful heiresses from around the globe unanimously voted to exclude Paris from its pages. Perhaps she’ll be asked to pose for piece on gorgeous convicts instead? [NY Post]
Enrique to Anna: "Adios!"
Game over! Maybe-married couple Iglesias and Kournikova have split after five years together. Now Enrique can get back to trying to beat his dad’s record number of lady lovers – a tally that’s allegedly in the thousands. [The Sun]
Young Jeezy Cuffed At Strip Club
The rapper was arrested early Thursday morning following an argument at
a Hot’lanta strip club. The drama was a family affair – both Jeezy and
his sister were cited for disorderly conduct. [MSN]
Today, the Jackson Family Auction kicks off, which means people with too much money will be able to take a little piece of the Jackson home. For the rest of us, it means that we get to virtually rummage through the Jacksons’ crap as shot after shot of the auction lots are posted online. We win! I mean, try to not gawk at this:
What is it? Probably some film prop. Why did Michael Jackson own it? A few thousand plastic surgeries ago, it provided a model for the face MJ would come to own: