The world is bracing for Paris Hilton’s first televised appearance after serving a 23-day stint in the clink. She will be interviewed on Lary King Live and Bodog, one of the most notorious gambling sites on the Web, is taking wagers on what subjects the heiress will discuss.
Odds are as follows:
1. Will Paris Hilton discuss finding God while in prison during her first post-prison interview on Larry King Live? Yes -840 No +450
2. Will Paris Hilton discuss her mental health issues while in prison during her first post-prison interview on Larry King Live? Yes -500 No +300 3. Will Paris Hilton wear an orange outfit during her first post-prison interview on Larry King Live? Yes +800
If you’re interested, you can also wager on whether or not Paris will be a guest host on the The View during 2007.
Britney Spears is supposedly trying to get back together with K-Fed, who is said to be worried that Brit is unstable. It doesn’t take a genius to see that she’s a mess – just wanting to get within 100 feet of that guy is crazy enough. Brit apparently told Kevin recently, "I’m not divorcing you! I want my family back!"
Okay. What else are we supposed to say? All she does all day long is act like an escaped mental patient: dyeing her own hair, letting her nipples hang out everywhere, and wearing unbearable tacky outfits borrowed from a nineties girl pop group. So if she wants to get back together with her man, then best of luck to her. Do it up Britney. Go nuts! Get your family back, and while you’re at it, how about getting some dignity back too, girlfriend.
"I look forward to order being restored to the chaos that our family life has become. Lyndsay,
Michael, Ali and Cody need stability and both of their parents in their
lives. I am anxious to spend time with them and end this cruel,
— Michael Lohan
It’s not like he really has to do much here. Just know how to spell your (oldest, most super famous) kid’s name right! Here are some other names he probably calls Lyndsay Lindsay:
My devilish ex-wife’s older sister
My ticket to hanging out with Paris Hilton
That chick in that Mean Girls movie who looks so much like that pain in the ass kid of mine
Ever since Being Bobby Brown ended in 2005, trash fiends have been jonesing for the second reality train wreck coming of Bobby. Rumors about a Flavor of Love-style dating show starring Bobby have been kicking around, and it looks like there might be some truth to them. Or something. Says Bobby on an upcoming project in the latest Sister 2 Sister:
"It’s not really a dating reality show. It’s more of a — you have to really see it because it’s a lot more acting than it is anything. It’s like a show on doing a dating reality show."
So it won’t really be The Flavor of Bobby, but something more like The Recipe of the Flavor of Bobby. That sounds…confusing. Whatever it is, it probably tastes like ABC gum and feet.
Bobby says that the show is headed for CBS right before revealing that he hasn’t actually signed a deal yet. That makes about as much sense as a show on doing a dating reality show. Perfect! [S2SMAGAZINE.com / Image credit: Getty]
NYC was home to a major celebrity hangout sesh earlier this week, when Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher joined forces with Shakira, Penelope Cruz, and Madonna to party the night away at hot spot Butter. The posse of popular kids danced on tables and holed up together in a booth, and oddly enough ignored the other celeb boozing at the bar, the one and only Janet – Miss Jackson if you’re nasty. And apparently Madge is just that, as a source tells Page Six that Janet “was not invited to join Madonna’s crew.” She then drowned her sorrows in the corner with “a ton of beer.”
Sounds like there’s a middle-aged lady-feud brewing, and surely there is only one way to settle this beef: A DANCE-OFF.Rhythm Nation vs. the Vogue Crew! Madonna Louise Ciccone vs. Janet Damita Jo Jackson! Nipple revealing wardrobe malfunction vs. all that floor humping, hanging off a cross crap!
Sigh. It’d be a dream from 1989 come true.
Cruising Funny or Die earlier, we came across this piece of video genius in which an infant cop forces Will Ferrell to sign a confession. The toddler is the daughter of frequent Ferrell collaborator Adam McKay. And she is mean. Swearing babies are hysterical.
Kanye West‘s new single off his upcoming record is called "Stronger," and it presents a very weird, not altogether unpleasant mash of styles, combining Kanye, Cassie and Daft Punk with fashions by Jeremy Scott and a retro-futuristic Japanese backdrop that alternately looks like Akira and The Fast and the Furious while referencing Nigo and A Bathing Ape. Phew. That’s a lot. The song is pretty catchy and the visuals are good, but the lyrics are on the ridiculous side of bad. Consider: "You know how long I’ve been on ya?/ Since Prince was on Apollonia/ Since OJ had Isotoners." And that’s to say nothing of the Vuitton and Dior mentions. The words, however, do pose a few questions that we’d like your opinion on. Does that which does not kill Kanye make him stronger? Would you like to be his "black Kate Moss" tonight? And is this song about stalking, or is it about what a great artist Kanye is? We can’t tell. Get used to it now, before he performs for Diana on Sunday.
Now and then our Tour Survival Guide will check in with rockers about life on the road. Here’s Rooney‘s Robert Schwartzman and Ned Brower on mainlining sugary cereal, getting decked in England and forgetting where you’ve been.
Music For Celebs To Do Drugs To Ned Brower: We played four nights at the Roxy just before we left. Mischa Barton showed up in our dressing room on psychedelic mushrooms, which was really weird. Needless to say she loved the show.
Wherever You Go, There You Are Robert Schwartzman: I remember we were playing Austin, and I said, "It’s so awesome to be in Austin for the first time." The band was like, "Dude, we’ve played here before." On the mic. Like, "Robert we’ve played here." And I was like, "No we haven’t." Then some fans were like, "Yes. You have."
Stunt or no-stunt? We believe it’s the latter. During a recent interview with Spin, Amy Winehouse diddled about with her hands like many of us do. Only the "Rehab" singer, who’s new single finds her confessing that she’s "no good," dug into her stomach with the shard of a broken mirror. The scrawled message? "I love blake." She’s referencing Blake Fielder-Civil, her new husband, but that’s a crazed way to pledge devotion, no? Call it a salute to Iggy Pop as well.
Winehouse freaks will want to grab this issue of the mag. Evidently it’s got some great quotes, such as "I write songs because I’m f*cked in the head and need to get something good out of something bad." No, no, no.