Britney to Judge on American Idol?

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Britney2_2Last season’s disappointing ratings of American Idol have started the rumor mill. If you believe the Interweb murmurs (and those of the National Enquirer), executives upset by Idol‘s viewership’s attrition — to Dancing With the Stars? come on, people! — may be not-so-quietly sharpening their knives for Paula Abdul and Randy Jackson. In their time of need, those in the brain trust at Fox have allegedly come up with a list of potential replacements for the two judges. Topping that list is disgraced pop star Britney Spears. And since Britney seems to have little else to do besides warning sunbathers against the dangers of jellyfish and mounting ill-conceived and poorly styled 12-minute "comeback" performances, we think this is a great idea. Go get ‘em, girl. That would be compelling television.

Madonna Annoys Even Maya Angelou

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July’s Africa-centered issue of Vanity Fair (guest edited by Bono) will sport 20 covers, all shot by the queen of click Annie Lebowitz. All of the covers have leaked (see them here), but this one’s the funniest, thanks to Maya Angelou‘s wincing:

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Madonna, leave that lady alone! That poor woman is old and she doesn’t want any of your damn Kabbalah water. [Vanity Fair]

Aniston’s New Man: More Than Friends

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Jen’s mystery dinner date has been revealed as 36-year-old British model (formerly a construction worker and boxer – yumtastic!) Paul Sculfor, and the pair’s been an item for several weeks. The hunk with a hot accent has been in ads for Christian Dior, Jean Paul Gaultier and Levi’s, and previously had a longterm relationship with George Clooney‘s ex, Lisa Snowdon.

Who cares who he is! He’s really effing hot, and Jen – who’s coming off a year-long dry spell – is FINALLY getting some sweet, sweet action. Hangin’ with chunky Vince Vaughn was probably a laugh a minute, but whose bare ass would YOU rather see in the morning?

Canoodle away, Jen! We approve.

Wednesday: Nicole Might Be A Baby Mama; Rihanna Gets Ever Hotter

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Nicole: Packin’ Pregnancy Pounds?

After being photographed at a fertility clinic, rumors run rampant that the pin thin starlet is eating for two. [MSNBC]

Paris On Silverman: An Effing B*tch

Sarah cracked wise about Hilton on The MTV Movies Awards show. Now Paris is p*ssed. Good thing she has three weeks in the clink to cool down. [Us Magazine]

Read more…

Glass-Encased Manson Throws Stones

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MansonDesperate shock rocker Marilyn Manson‘s latest stop on the Crazytrain? Dissing My Chemical Romance. Manson tells The London Paper his song "Mutilation Is the Most Sincere Form of Flattery," featuring the lyrics  "f*ck you, f*ck you," is directed at the Jersey goth rockers. Manson takes issue with the "sad, pitiful, shallow version" of Manson the band has affected. He then entreats the band, "If they want to identify with me, then here’s a razor blade. Call me when you’re done and we’ll talk."

Unfortunately, it seems that Mr. Brian Warner owns a glass house: He’s constructed his stage persona by ripping off Marilyn Monroe and Charles Manson, gotten his goth rock aesthetics from Alice Cooper, Trent Reznor and Ozzy Osbourne. Add to the list his stealing lengthy song titles from emo hearthrobs like Fall Out Boy, and Manson doesn’t have much room to speak. Most recently, he’s taken a page from recently divorced middle-aged men by dating someone half his age.

Oprah’s Crotch Loves Couture

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Oprah_quotableWonder what Oprah Winfrey‘s rocking on her crotch? Wonder no more! Said O at Monday’s CFDA Fashion Awards:

"I still have a pair of red patent-leather boots. Years ago, I saw The Vagina Monologues and they said, ‘What is your vagina wearing?’ It’s wearing Ralph Lauren red patent-leather boots."

According to the New York Daily News‘ report, soon after saying this,  Oprah stubbed her toe. In happier news, she did not stub her vagina. [New York Daily News / Image credit: Getty]

Hottie of the Week: Rihanna

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Photo_20x9_1 Hottie Photos: Rihanna

If you don’t believe Rihanna‘s hype even after seeing last Sunday’s MTV Movie Awards, then we don’t know how to help you. The 19-year-old "Umbrella" singer showed up Jay-Z with a choreographed routine where she was clad in fetish gear — basically what appeared to be a succession of belts. Fun.

Her third album, Good Girl Gone Bad, showcases more club-bangers and sensitive R&B balladry, but it’s her live performances we’re impressed by.

To see why you want to be under this girl’s umbrella-ella-ella any day-ay-ay, click the pics:

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And don’t miss our complete Rihanna: Hottie of the Week photo album!

Prisoner Paris: Cold, Crying & Confused

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She’s only been behind bars for a few days, but already Paris has had to face the taunts of fellow inmates, the confusing feat of making collect calls, and rampant  Staph infections. With so much drama going down, how is our peroxide princess going to last another 21 days!?

On Tuesday
the heiress was visited by the two most important men in her life: her lawyer and her shrink. Sources say Hilton, while friendly with inmates and staff, has been crying a lot and is "cracking under the pressure of prison." A lawyer for another inmate reported that she, "came out of her cell to make a phone call. She’s not used to making collect calls and she needed help. A sergeant had to help her."

You’d think one of her "people" would have introduced her to the ways of pay phones prior to her little vacation behind bars. No wonder she’s crying, she probably thinks it’s a giant Blackberry and wants to know why she doesn’t own it yet.

Read more…

Blog Best-Of: Deelishis’ Derriere

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Deelishis_links2- Flavor of Love 2‘s Deelishis resurfaces, and this time, she’s singing…about her butt. Combining ass with assets is like killing two birds with one cheek. [Vibe Confidential]

- And speaking of ass, Britney‘s got nothing to sing about. [Egotastic!]

- Remember when Paris Hilton going to jail was just a candy-colored figment of David LaChapelle’s imagination? Our society has progressed so much since then! [CityRag]

- Rihanna says she’ll never provide the tabloid fodder of Paris and Lindsay. "I’m just not the type to get sucked into bulls***." Sounds like someone isn’t interested in being a superstar! [Cake & Ice Cream]

- America’s Spelling Bee champion, Evan O’Dorney gives majorly bizarre attitude during a CNN interview. Reality TV, meet your future. [Best Week Ever]