What’s in Britney Spears’ Bloodstream?

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druggiebritney.jpgThe judge in Britney’s custody case has ordered the new restrictions in her case to be put in place, meaning our girl’s gonna be attending those parenting classes real soon. Even better, Brit’s gotta get drug tested twice a week, and we can’t wait to see what they reveal. What could possibly be floating around in that girl’s bloodstream – besides, you know, all the drugs and booze she supposedly ingests?

  • Two tons of Starbucks Venti Java Chip Frappuccino
  • Seventeen liters of Clairol Nice n’ Easy Hair Dye in Natural Light Ash Blonde
  • A bottle’s worth of Fantasy by Britney Spears perfume
  • Cheetos resin
  • One fake nail chewed off five minutes before VMAs performance
  • Bit Bit the chihuahua
  • A couple of fedoras
  • Oh yeah, and a bunch of drugs

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Tuesday: Hayden Panettiere’s Potty Mouth

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hayden0925.jpgBritney’s Bizarre Car Rides
The singer used to drive on the wrong side of the road and into oncoming traffic with her kids in the car. Those parenting classes sound more and more necessary. [NY Post]

Heroes Star Freaks Out for Fans
Hayden Panettiere may only be 18-years old but she drops F bombs like an old sailor, cursing out photogs who were crushing a small fan. Our hero! [TMZ]

Paris Takes Up with a Tourist
Her new boyfriend is a Swedish tourist visiting LA for the summer. Let’s hope he takes her home to meet his folks and she never returns.

Jake & Reese Back Together?
The most boring couple on earth can’t seem to decide if they want to be together or not. We’re too busy watching paint dry to even care. [E Online]

Charlie Sheen & Ex Battle Over Kids
They each want their kids, so they each accuse the other of being crazy. Your parents look like angels next to these two lunatics. [NYDN]

The Pick Up Artist: Finale Recap!

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Go Kosmo!

A month of tears, break dancing, rejection, furry hats, more tears, a name change, a stripper with a boyfriend, a peach that needed some kissing, tears, a Speedo, a dork named Kip, a little more tears and Pradeep. Was it all worth it? We’d guess yes! In his own words, The Nerd Formerly Known as Alvaro is “so money” right now. And not just because he’s $50,000 richer, peeps. Kosmo is THE PICK UP ARTIST! And that title is worth more that dollar bills, ya’ll. Right?

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The Pick Up Artist: King Kosmo Konfesses!

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Maybe you were wooed by his break-dancing moves, charmed by his tears or freaked out at his hyper tendencies. Maybe you just liked looking at his bod in a Speedo. Ladies liked him enough to kiss close and bounce to new locations, and Mystery liked him so much that he named him The Pick Up Artist. Yes, Kosmo is King!

In our first interview installment, Kosmo (aka Alvaro, if you play that way) opens up about the moment Mystery changed his life, the way some fellow contestants talked to trees, and why his acting career doesn’t necessarily make him a ladies man. Make sure to make the jump to find out why he thinks Scott is like a…
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Rilo Kiley Rock VH1 Offices

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Missed Rilo Kiley at their sold-out Webster Hall shows? So did we, which only compounded our case of the Mondays. The only thing that could salvage our day? Having the adventurous indie darlings over to rock the 20th floor offices of VH1. Which is precisely what they did this morning. To promote their brand new Under the Blacklight, the Kiley stopped by to play us three tracks off their latest.

The band launched into their slinky, sex-worker single “The Moneymaker,” with the lovely Jenny Lewis nailing every note, despite her self-confessed sleepiness. “This is the first time this combination has ever happened,” the floppy-hatted Lewis dead-panned, gesturing to her coffee and her performance. Next up, the band played a bongo-laced version of “Dreamworld,” with co-singer Blake Senett on vocals, before finishing up with the impossibly tiny Lewis warmly belting out the glorious “Silver Lining” (watch the video here). Before they jetted off to their Conan appearance, the band hung around to chat and eat cupcakes. Pop stars — they’re just like us! Check out their latest record here.

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Blog Best-Of: Beckham’s Burlesque

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posh_links.jpg- Victoria Beckham is rumored to be joining the Pussycat Dolls for a few performances. Going from the Spice Girls to PCD is like going from working the BunnyRanch to Hunt’s Point. Tragic. [Dlisted]

- Meg White‘s rep denies those sex-tape allegations chalking them up to “a very twisted sense of humor.” I’m more concerned about people’s eyesight than their sense of humor, but hey, that’s me. [TMZ.com]

- The filming for the Sex and the City movie is underway. If we’re lucky, they’ll hold the sex. [CityRag]

- Lil Wayne adopts a Gollum-like stance for the cover of Vibe. He’s never looked more presssshhhhhusssssss! [Crunk + Disorderly]

- Sienna Miller is upset that nude photos of her have leaked. So is my stomach. [Seriously? OMG! WTF?]

[Image: Getty]

Ladies Love WHODINI

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Ramping up for Hip Hop Honors, we spoke with each of this year’s heroes for our “Tales From the Road” series. We asked seminal hip hop group WHODINI to recall some of their craziest experiences on the road. The Brooklyn trio fondly remember playing Detroit, and each cops to some competitive boot-knockin’ that went on in Motor City. Check out the clip and find out who holds the record for the most conquests…in one evening.

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Rock of Love: Finale Forecast

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Comment!
The Rock of Love season finale airs Sunday, September 30 at 9PM ET. Will it be Heather or Jes that wins the all-access pass to Bret Michaels‘ heart and superstar lifestyle? Watch season highlights and sexy clips of the girls, check tons of pics, and then make your picks.

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Lindsay Lohan Breaks Up a Marriage

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lindsaylohan0924.jpgMight as well face it you’re addicted to coke booze shopping dying your hair sex! Phew – there you have it. We knew Lindsay Lohan was still addicted to something, rehab or no rehab. We doubt this was advised in her group therapy sessions, but it looks like La Lohan is now hooked on home wrecking, after the wife of her alleged rehab romp has filed for divorced and cited the actress as the cause! Stephanie Allen has kicked her “rocker” husband Tony out, after he allegedly got it all up in Lindsay in the bathroom at Cirque Lodge. Stephanie is the heir to the McDonald’s container fortune (no joke) so you know she means business. Tony, front-man of the band Dead Stays Alive, has denied any sort of romance, and pics of him hanging with LiLo during rehab outings are strictly G-rated. But the divorce papers cite adultery as the cause for the split and use tabloid articles about his affair with Lohan as evidence.

Who needs evidence when dealing with LiLo!? She’d probably just lie and say the pants she was wearing weren’t her’s and Tony Allen just happened to be in them. [Image: Getty]

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I Love New York 2 – Casting Special!

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A slew of I Love New York 2 Casting Special extras have hit VSPOT, and the personalities involved are so big that it’s shaping up to be a hell of a season. Flavor of Love / Charm School graduates Goldie and Shay “Buckeey” Johnson curate the spots as the producers travel to Chicago, Detroit, Atlanta and New York in hopes of finding men to compete for New York’s affection. Along the way, you’ll meet an Asian dude who goes by the name of “Big Johnson,” a self-professed “partying Indian,” a man who describes himself as “hood and a homeowner,” a father-son team, a guy who claims that “body and joint manipulation is my specialty” and a rather curious fellow who goes by the name “Mr. Bojangle” (no S!), looks like Sisqo and claims that New York “mentally called him” to the audition.

Below, check out one of the clips featuring a thirtysomething virgin and a retired male exotic dancer. Both are pleading to be on the show and both are as portly as they are entertaining.

The I Love New York 2 Casting Special airs Monday, Oct 1 at 9/8c on VH1.

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