Finns Storm the Disco – Who’s the Indian?

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If these dudes only had some infield rakes and a sense of pinstripe choreography, they could be part of the Yankees’ 7th inning grounds crew staff.

As one of the YouTube commentors so perfectly put it: “Chitalada , tää on iha silkalla huumorilla tehty, ei nyh nii tosissaa tarvii ottaa.”

When was the last time you played “YMCA”?

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A Fine Frenzy Hits TV Tonight

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A Fine Frenzy
Lots of singers have tried their hands at acting; lots of singers have their songs used in TV shows. But not all that many work in front of the camera while their tunes are wafting through the background of a show. That makes A Fine Frenzy somewhat unique – something we’ve been telling you for a couple months now.

Alison Sudol, the pianist-singer who goes by the name A Fine Frenzy, makes her acting debut on CSI:NY tonight at 10 pm EST. The cops find blood on the Statue of Liberty’s crown, and a vigilante tries to murder a musician; as the plot unfolds, AFF’s “Almost Lover” and “Last of Days” help set the show’s tone. Has she got the chops to hold her own with Gary Sinise and company? You tell us.

And if you feel like catching her live, here’s a list of tour dates to mull over.

Who’s your favorite singer-actor?

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Everyone’s Invited to Britney’s Pit Stop

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Watch this video and you may feel a little bad for Britney Spears. Girl has to pee, runs into her local Quiznos, and ends up with a gajillion cameras in her face and dudes falling over tables as she tries to leave. But here’s the weird thing – she appears to have invited one of the cameramen into the bathroom with her. Weird? Yes. Creepy? Yes. Insane? Yes. Britney’s so effing predictable, it hurts! The way she does things these days, it’d be weirder if she peed in a clean bathroom in the privacy of her own home with no one watching. [IDLYITW]

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Paris Hilton to Invade Rwanda

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paris_rwanda.jpgPeople of Rwanda!

Let this blog post be a warning to you (er, pending that you have internet access and all). A dangerous, possibly disease-filled monster, Paris Hilton, is coming to your country to “bring more attention to what people can do to help” you. But she will not do this by putting an end to the war and poverty your country has experienced!

Whatever tables you have she will dance on them! She will strip off the clothes you give her! She will have relations with your sexiest young men and then talk a lot of crap about your women – all while filming it so that she may leak it on the internet later. This monster does not care that only “41 percent of the population has easy access to safe drinking water,” she will guzzle it all down and then laugh in your face! Lock up your food when she asks for In-n-Out Burger or Taco Bell. These are code words for “I’m going to eat all the food you have, bitches!”

If you see size 11 footprints in the ground, she has arrived. Run in the opposite direction. She moves in luxury vehicles and can be fast – often sending tiny dogs to track you down. Most importantly, do not call anything “hot.” This is her signal that you want to be BFF, and she will never leave.

Look out.

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Ashlee Simpson’s Personality Disorder

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ashlee_simpsonThe biggest difference between pop stars and us? When pop stars create alter egos, it’s “artistic” and they end up selling records. When we do? It’s “crazy” and we end up eating out of garbage cans. Go figure. The latest pop star in the long, illustrious line to credit her alter ego on her new album? That younger, stringy-haired Simpson lass Ashlee. “You will know when Vicky is in the room,” says Simpson of her wilder side, Vicky Valentine. Ashlee’s been hard at work on her latest, due out in November, which features songs like “Murder” (sample lyric: “I’ve got a monkey on my back, get it off/…I get away with murder”) and “Ragdoll,” in which Simpson tells the story of an abusive lover. “Rulebreaker,” hovewever, is all Vicky Valentine. “”She’s tough. You don’t want to mess with her.”

So who else has a dark side? Check out our list of Rock’s Alter Egos.

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Kiefer Sutherland is Drunk – Again

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Jack Bauer may torture people and stuff, and sure he gets hooked on heroin to solve national crimes. But does he get sloshed and then drive around? Doubtful – not even if the survival of mankind depended on it! He’s just not that kind of guy. But guess what – Kiefer Sutherland is! He was arrested Tuesday morning for failing a sobriety test, and may be in some serious trouble as he’s already on probation for another DUI – bringing his total DUI count up to four. Hopefully Kiefer will channel his inner-Bauer to get out of this mess (kinda like he does in the above video clip). He may not be above the law, but the character he plays on TV is. It’s pretty much the same thing! [Mollygood]

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Wednesday: J. Lo’s Water Works

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jlo092607.jpgJ. Lo Weeps at Bronx School Visit
The singer got all teary-eyed visiting her old elementary school. Sounds like someone’s feeling a bit hormonal…we wonder why? [Us Weekly]

Paris Goes Champagne Crazy in NYC
The starlet and her new boyfriend found themselves with thirteen free bottles of champagne sent over by fans at two NYC clubs. Guess Paris is even more fun to stare at when she’s hammered. [NY Post]

Pam’s Bad Behavior Worries Pals
The MILF is partying super hard with new boyfriend (and Paris’ sex tape partner) Rick Solomon by her side. We hope her kids are watching and learning! [NY Post]

The Hills’ Heidi Admits Implants

It only took her six months to reveal what we already knew – her boobs are as fake as her engagement to Spencer. [Us Weekly]

X-Tina Shows Off Big Baby Bump
Christina’s not even trying to hide her growing belly anymore, which only makes it less fun to talk about. [X17]

“Don’t Tase Me Bro” Rocks the Web

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Can’t get enough of that student who was tasered at a John Kerry speech last week? The incident – and his infamous cry of “Don’t Tase Me Bro!” – lives on forever on the web, inspiring a ton of “Don’t Tase Me Bro!” musical numbers for your listening pleasure. Why there’s:

Police weapons have never sounded this good before!

Blog Best-Of: Houston’s Homecoming

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whitney_links.jpg- Whitney Houston is photographed looking absolutely ravishing. Take that, crack cocaine! [A Socialite's Life]

- A wise woman once said: “Ladies pinch, whores wear rouge.” Sarah Jessica Parker obviously did not take note. [The Blemish]

- Courtney Love denies Sharon Osbourne‘s claim that she gave Jack Osbourne drugs: “I would never give drugs to a teenager.” Duh! Courtney’s supply is for tweens only! [Dlisted]

- Dita Von Teese teams with PETA to promote “animal birth control.” But not abstinence because really, with legs like that, she’d just be a hypocrite. [Popbytes]

- will.i.am says: “When I wrote ‘My Humps,’ I said, ‘This is the stupidest thing ever,’ but in a good way.” Well, he’s half right. [Crunk + Disorderly]