Sensitive songwriter, witty comedian, and part-time bluesman John Mayer has announced the opening act for his upcoming tour: likeminded soul Ben Folds. He also announced his opening-opening acts: rocker Rocco DeLuca, indie-folkie Brett Dennen and just-add-a-beach-and-piano pop star James Morrison. The tour starts June 1st in Ridgefield, Washington, and goes for 38 dates – which is probably just long enough for Mayer to come up with some ideas for a new VH1 comedy show, a feature and in-book contest for Esquire, and a whole line of clothing for hipsters. What a guy. Check his tour dates here.
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Hope Britney‘s suite at that rehab spa has a least a couple of bathrooms – when you pound down 24 cans of Coke a day, tinkle time is always around the corner. Whispers from the West Coast say our most beloved pop-tart is a bit cranky these days. She’s not treating the facility’s staffers with the kind of grace you might expect. But evidently one dude is getting some smiles from the Kojak’d one. It’s said that Spears’ latest sweetie is Jason Filyah, a guitarist for a band called Riva (google ‘em and get back to us). Whatever you do, don’t tell Fed-Ex; that dude still loves her, you know it’s true.
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Kid Rock Assaults Woman Who Refused Sexy-Time
Woman alleges Kid became violent because she wouldn’t stay the night with him. [The Macomb Daily]
Stevie Wonder Sued In Sexual Harassment Snafu
Man claims he was fired after questioning a sexual harassment incident involving the music legend. [TMZ]
Yet Another Brangelina Adoption Is Official
Jolie took home her new three-year-old Vietnamese son on Thursday. [Us Online]
Tracy Morgan’s Craziest Rant Ever
Not as funny as 30 Rock, but twice as good as The Tracy Morgan Show. [College Humor]
Out of Prison, Lohan’s Dad Wants to Make Up
Daddy: "When she sees I’m walking the walk, I’m hopeful she’ll open the door." [CNN]
Despite Simon’s playful poking at Ryan Seacrest’s sexuality on Tuesday, the only one that was outed on last night’s American Idol was 28-year-old contestant Brandon Rogers. Sharing his Bottom Three shame were Phil Stacey and Sanjaya Malakar, but it was line-flubber Rogers that was sent packing. Don’t worry about Brandon, though, because according to his Idol Fast Facts, he still intends on following his dreams—if he can remember them under pressure, that is.
Anyway, all assertions aside, the queerest thing that happened on Idol last night was the Ford Music Video that showcased the Top 12 resurrecting Modest Mouse’s 2004 hit "Float On," to which they marched like zombies through the ’60s, ’70s, and ’80s, until they found their way to some Ford convertibles. Hmm, it makes one wonder what lead singer Isaac Brock thought of the raping of his song.
We didn’t think a reality show about finding another pair of juggs to add to the Pussycat Dolls’ collection would be worth watching. That’ll teach us to doubt Pussycat Power.
The first episode The Search for the Next Doll not only featured dance rehearsals that were as dramatic as scenes from Showgirls, but a sense of desperation worthy of A Chorus Line, too. But it wasn’t until a series of close-ups revealed vomiting girls (thanks to a flu bug that wiped out half of the potential candidates) that we realized we were glued to the Cannibal Holocaust of elimination-based reality shows.
Synopsis? This is one that goes all the way! After the jump is a small recap of all the craziness that went down on this week’s show:
Christina Aguilera will appear on an episode of CSI. Finally that script for "Genie in a Forensics Lab" will see the light of day.
Remember that Guns n’ Roses leak last month off the glacial Chinese Democracy? Harley Davidson’s responsible for that, as well as the whole "yuppification of biker culture" thing.
Goodnight Tampa! The Who curtailed their Florida show last night due to lead singer Roger Daltrey’s ill pipes after one song. There’s a "A Quick One While He’s Away" joke here, I’m sure.
In what might be seen as the ruler reaching out to his disciples, Usher‘s name has recently surfaced in connection with a couple of R&B’s young guns. First, he popped up on a remix of Omarion‘s "Icebox," a version that uses the same beats as the original but has new verses by O and Ush (you can listen to the remix here). Now, SOHH.com is reporting that Usher "got at" Ne-Yo to collaborate on a new single, which should be out this spring. Whether Usher genuinely respects the new blood as artists or simply wants to keep them at arm’s length remains to be seen. But regardless of where this goes, collaboration beats beef any day.
- On last night’s Idol, Simon Cowell implored Ryan Seacrest to “come out” of his closet. This video just burned it down. [Gawker]
- Madonna looks refreshed – could it be that she’s had some, ahem, enhancements of the plastic variety? Once a material girl, always a material girl. [CityRag]
- Don’t hate because Tyra Banks and her talk show received Emmy nominations. Her “Kiss my fat ass rant” was the dramatic performance of the millennium. [Dlisted]
- In the latest development in the Rosie O’Donnell/Donald Trump feud, Rosie says that she’ll “never mention that dump truck again.” She probably means “never” as in “on tomorrow’s episode of The View.” [Best Week Ever]
- Britney Spears reportedly will leave rehab early to attend Kevin Federline’s birthday party. Nothing chases recovery like your booze-swilling ex. [I'm Not Obsessed]
In this episode, New York climbs into a hot-air balloon and then worries about her weave catching on fire.
Seriously, what else do you need to know?