Eva Longoria’s Super Kinky Sex Tape

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OMG!! Those Eva Longoria sex tape rumors turned out to be true. Who would have thought? Surely Tony Parker must be packing up his things and heading far far away from his scandalicious wife. Give it a watch and you’ll see why. If you’re into kinky stuff like watching the tiny Desperate Housewives star eat turkey wraps in night vision and have pillow fights, than this tape is totally for you. If you’re more into the actual sex stuff, you may want to do a Google search involving Paris Hilton and some dirty words. [FunnyorDie]

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Tuesday: Jen Aniston Likes ‘Em Young

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jenaniston.jpgLil Wayne Goes Big for his B-Day
The rapper has thrown himself a second birthday bash, this time on a yacht in Miami, complete with cigars and Diddy. [TMZ]

Cam Diaz Nuzzling a New Guy
Big surprise, Cameron is now getting cozy with some other actor dude. Shouldn’t she spend some time getting to know herself? [NY Post]

Jen Aniston Scores Orlando Bloom?
The actress was spotted on vacation in Mexico – with Orlando Bloom!? Go get ‘em, cougar! [ WWTDD]

Ben Affleck Blames J.Lo for Bombs
Ben boldly links all his crappy career moves to his time dating Jennifer Lopez. We’d point the finger at those cheap-ass hair plugs. [People]

Is Pam Anderson Pregnant?
Pam may be heading down the aisle because she’s already got a bun in the oven. Birth control doesn’t seem to exist in Hollywood, huh. [DListed]

The Celebreality Interview – Heather

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Heather learned that every rose has its thorn the hard way when Bret picked Jes to be his rock of love and essentially pricked the beating heart out of Heather’s body. And though it sent her on a bitter and memorable tirade, you’ll see in the interview below that Heather’s heart has softened as time has passed.

After the jump, big news abounds: a woman of her word, Heather has quit stripping. She talks about her former profession, whether she regrets getting Bret’s name tattooed on her, the state of her sexuality and that awesome, awesome hair she rocked week after week like the trooper that she is.

Read more…

Act Like An Ass, Lose Your Kids

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It couldn’t have gone on forever. Not after the bodyguard spilled the beans. So the court has stepped in and removed Britney Spears‘ kids from the singer’s home. As of Wednesday, that bastion of maturity, Kevin Federline, will take care of his own progeny. You recall the history. The judge ordered a parenting coach, and random testing for drugs after finding “habitual, frequent, and continuous use of controlled substances” defining the toxic one’s party-centric lifestyle. So come mid-day Wednesday, K-Fed will have to nurture Sean Preston and his brother himself – if he can stay alive, that is. Check pics of Brit and K-Fed in happier times, plus a few snapshots of Brit’s recent VMA disaster.

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Snoop & The Game? Missy & Eve? Must Be Bridging the Gap

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We’ve all caught hip-hop fever around VH1, which isn’t surprising, considering that VH1′s annual Hip-Hop Honors show premieres next Monday, October 8th at 10 p.m. (EST). In the lead-up to that extravaganza, we’re featuring all sorts of beat-making and rhyme-slinging on our fair network. Tonight, there are at least two shows you should know about (in addition to finding out what happened to the men of I Love New York). First up, there’s Bridging the Gap: Queen Latifah and Eve (11 p.m. EST). The two rappers hit some of L.A.’s finest boutiques, eat a little lunch in Beverly Hills, and then sit down to make hip-hop history by writing and recording a song together. A half-hour later, there’s Bridging the Gap: The Game and Snoop Dogg (11:30 p.m. EST), which follows the same premise — get one of the genre’s pioneers and one of its mavericks together, and watch them create. Whose track do you think will be smoother? We’re counting on hip-hop honoree Snoop. Click above for a tour of his studio.

I Love New York: Where Are They Now?

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Here’s a little heads-up that tonight at 10/9c, VH1 will air the I Love New York: Where Are They Now? special. Wondering how far along Chance and Real are with their Stallionaires hip-hop project? Curious to see how far 12 Pack and Heat are in their…relationship? Dying to know if Romance ever stopped crying? You’ll find out.

This airs, by the way, right after the I Love New York 2 Casting Special because you can’t go forward without thinking about the past. Especially if your past includes the lovable banshee that is New York.

K-Fed Out to Bust Brit for Driving Illegally

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britney1001.jpgFrom the Desk of Britney J. Spears:

Oops ya’ll! Kevin’s lawer is all PO’ed at me because I like, drove my Mercedes Benz (it cost a lot of money!) without a real California license. Big deal! I have a fake license that my cousin gave me that has my actual name on it but instead of California it says “Bimbo’s Driver’s License!” How funny is that? Especially because I don’t even know what a bimbo is. I’m sure it’s something sexy. Anyhoodles, I got a real license too, from like Louisiana or Texas or wherever I grew up. I’m sure I can use that in California. And who cares if my kids were in the car or not? I had them strapped into their tiny people seats with duct tape and straps and stuff. They’re finnnneee. So what if it’s, like, illegal? I’m pretty sure I still have a lot of money, and you know people with money get away with bad stuff because we’re better than other people. Didn’t I just sell some perfume or my own line of hamburger meat or something? Whatever. I’m still rich.

I gotta go pee now.
I love rum and cokes my fans my kids, ya’ll!

- Britz

Radiohead’s Amazing Technicolor Return

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Experimental British mope-rockers Radiohead announced their return yesterday. In a statement on their website, the band revealed plans to release their seventh studio album, In Rainbows, on October 10th — the digital version, anyhow. (The regular old brick-and-mortar disc comes out on December 3rd, with plenty of extra bells, whistles, songs, artwork and the like. You know the drill.) Here’s the fun part, though: For the download release, the band has adopted a pay-what-you-want policy, sort of like what your local natural history museum does on Thursday nights. In other words, you can buy the whole album for as little as close to a penny. In the meantime, rock ‘n’ roll cheat-sheet TheNME has combed all the way through the YouTubes to preview the new album. You have to be a fairly dedicated fan to get much mileage from this stuff, but we had a feeling you might like it anyhow. Above is album-opener “15 Step.”

Kanye West Blogs About His Favorite Topic

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Suffering from Kanye West overkill? Of course not! The world can’t get enough of Mr. West – from his number one album and single, to his appearances on Ellen and Saturday Night Live, to his tantrum backstage at the VMAs last month, to his many magazine covers, to – okay yeah, we’re hella sick of the guy. But there’s one person who’s not – and that’s good ol’ Kanye West. Apparently the man diva just figured out how to get his voice out over the web, and his new blog is a combination of YouTube clips (he loves the newscaster who falls over while stomping grapes too!), pictures of sneakers, and lots and lots of stuff about HIMSELF. Surprised?

Check out Kanye’s hip home in cyberspace and take a look at the rapper poking fun at himself on the premiere of SNL this weekend. It’s kind of a relief that his sense of humor (and ability to poke fun at himself) is almost as big at his ego.