Paris Hilton is an Expert on Parenting

by

parisexpert0809071.jpgThe above statement should be obvious, considering how wonderful Paris Hilton is as a dog owner. Even though she has yet to pop a baby out, Paris knows all about what makes a good mommy, and has total faith in Nicole Richie to be one. “She’s really happy.” Paris said of her BFF. “I just got off the phone with her. She’s so excited. I know she’s going to be the best mom ever.”

Really? How do you know, exactly? Because she’s been so fun to get fall-down drunk with over the past 26 years? Paris also revealed that Nicole and her man are “really in love.” Now that’s something we trust Paris to talk about. Now stop blabbing and get back to that charity work, heiress. [People. Image: Getty]

Related Content
news_20×920.gifParis and Nicole Get XXX in Porno Flick
news_20×920.gifParis Back to Sing. Sing!
news_20×920.gifParis Wants You in Her Pants
photo_20×928.gifBrowse All Paris Hilton Photos

Patton Oswalt: Religious Flav Of Love?

by

Flavor Flav

Stopped on the red carpet for Sunday night’s Roast of Flavor Flav on Comedy Central, professional wiseacre and rat-voice star Patton Oswalt wondered what would happen if the Catholic church got all hooked-up in a reality show.

Our coverage of the event gave you a taste of what to expect, but if your life is built around curse-riddled zingers, you’ll want to spend a few seconds with the show’s trailer. Hey, Brigitte Nielsen’s not really a man, is she?

Related Content
photo_20×928.gifFlav Roast Photos
photo_20×928.gif20 Things: Flavor Flav
news_20×921.gifFlav Roast: Big Laffs, Small Stick?
news_20×921.gifDeelishis: Still There for Flav
news_20×921.gifFlav’s Roast a Visual Feast
news_20×921.gifFlavor Flav’s Back…With a New Taste

A Real American Idol?

by

babyidol.jpgA hearty congratulations goes to Antoria Gillon. The 20-year-old hairstylist was nine-months pregnant while auditioning for the upcoming season of American Idol. Well, she’s not pregnant anymore! Gillon went into contractions while waiting her turn on line. The labor pains continued as she performed for the judges. She said: “I gave it my all through the contractions. They were back to back and getting harder and harder but I was more than willing to have my baby right there. I wasn’t leaving without my golden ticket to the next round.” As if that weren’t nutty enough, Gillon proved herself to be a genius by naming her son Jamil Labarron Idol McCowan. Two thoughts: First, if this keeps up, Gillon’s going to give Dina Lohan a run for worst mother of the year; second, Rupert Murdoch, the Australian mogul who controls Fox, American Idol’s parent company, has just found himself a new marketing and PR exec. You’d hire her, wouldn’t you? Thanks, Fox! You’ve made our lives better. Again. [Image via Dlisted]

Related Content
news_20×921.gif‘Idol’ Hopeful in Sex Scandal
news_20×921.gifClay Aiken: Beat Up By a Girl
news_20×921.gifAntonella & the Idols: Secrets Revealed

Kobe Bryant Denies Divorce Rumors

by

kobe080907.jpgA nice juicy divorce rumor was bouncing around the web about basketball star Kobe Bryant, but he’s stuck his big-ass foot out and squashed it before it could even grow. Apparently he and his wife of six years, Vanessa, were headed down the road of Nick and Jessica, with Vanessa possibly getting half of her man’s earnings as no pre-nup was ever signed. Not so, says the Laker star. He told Entertainment Tonight that “he has no idea how the rumors got started because he and Vanessa are happily married”. Um…seriously? I can think of lots of reasons for rumors to get started, with a really horrible one in particular standing out. You know, that Kobe’s like a FOOT taller than his wife. That’s a lot of height, and a TOTALLY understandable reason to split up. That and the whole sex assault/cheating scandal from a few years ago. But not Kobe and his Kim Kardashian-esque wifey! Oh well. If they change their minds in a couple months or years, we won’t hold it against them. [ET. Image: Getty]

Related Content
news_20×921.gifKobe Bryant Wants Out Of Lakerville
photo_20×928.gifHot Shots: Cool Pics From Celebville

Madonna Gets the Timba Touch

by

timba3.jpgMidas-like producer Timbaland is finally divulging some of the deets on his work on the new Madonna album. Partnering with Justin Timberlake, Tim wrote and produced ten songs on Her Madgesty’s album, due out in November. “She’s great. … She’s got a hot album. Her album is up there with Justin’s album,” Timbaland told MTV News during yesterday’s Video Music Awards press conference. Rumors began soon after Tim and Justin were seen out with Madonna earlier this spring. Tim went on to talk about one song, called “La, La” — “The hook is no words. It’s saying stuff named after coffee — all these different names for coffee — is the hook.” Sounds interesting. And caffeinated.
[MTV News / Image: Getty]

(Click the thumbnails to see recent photos of Madonna on stage.)

Related Content
news_20×921.gifMoz: Madonna Is Murder?
news_20×921.gifTimbaland Getting His Gold Watch Soon?
news_20×921.gifLook Into Madonna’s Eyes
photo_20×928.gifBrowse All Madonna Photos
photo_20×928.gifBrowse All Timbaland Photos
video_20×914.gifBox Set: Madonna

The Lohans are Loser Parents

by

lindsaydina080907.jpgLindsay Lohan‘s former bodyguard, Tony Almeida, who worked for the starlet from 2002-2005, has come forward to rat out her parents for being totally crappy at their job. This is hardly news, as even tiny babies know that Michael’s a loon and Dina’s one of those enabling, “I wanna be BFFs with my kids,” kind of ladies. But Tony gives us even more disastrous deets about the Lohans, like the time Michael got so violent while driving on the highway he pulled their car over and slammed Lindsay against the hood, screaming at her and calling her a slut. Nice.

Dina didn’t help the situation, apparently letting her daughter booze at parties and have sleepovers with her then-boyfriend Aaron Carter at fifteen. Letting her daughter go near that scrawny thing was her first mistake right there! Tony also claims he once found Lindsay snorting “powder” in a closet, and says she cut herself repeatedly and threatened suicide, desperate for attention. Sounds like she’s gonna need a lot more help than a third stint in rehab. Just do a Drew Barrymore and get rid of ‘em all Linds! Even if your ex-security guy is lying, your fam did let you make that stripper-murder movie, and that alone is grounds for dismissal. [NY Post. Image: Getty]

Related Content
news_20×921.gifP*ssed Off Moms: Hollywood’s Hottest Accessory
news_20×921.gifRob Schneider vs. Dina Lohan
photo_20×928.gifLindsay & Dina Lohan Photos

Fiddy Wishes Scherzinger’s Name Was Hot Like His

by

50_nicole.jpg

50 Cent is just like us, at least in one respect: he can’t pronounce the name of Pussycat DollsNicole Scherzinger, either. Even though they got together for a track for Fiddy’s upcoming Curtis disc, the rapper couldn’t get down with her name. He recently told Blender:

They should’ve changed her name. Her name is Schizinger or some s***, right? That’s a f***ed up name…I’d give her like a stripper name. Maybe ‘Pleasure’ or some s***. ‘Nicole Natalie.’

Fiddy has the right idea: down with Schizinger! If old Schizzy isn’t feeling “Pleasure” or “Nicole Natalie,” here are a few other suggestions she should seriously consider. They’re all better than “Scherzigner,” but then again, the sound of a vacuum cleaner is better than “Scherzinger.” Anyway, our list:

- The One Who Sings
- The One Who Stands in Front
- Frontsie
- H.B.I.P.C.D.
- Boobycat
- Buttycat
- Vagineycat
- Eunice
- Tease-a-Louise
- Treasure
- Eva Non-Goria
- Fueled by Iovine

[Blender Blog / Image credit: Getty]

Related Content
news_20×921.gif50 vs. Kanye: It’s On! No, It’s Off! Wait, Does That Mean It’s On?
news_20×921.gifBlog Best-Of: Fiddy’s Fight
news_20×921.gifFiddy: Lil’ Kim is Dude-ish
news_20×921.gifFiddy Takes Another Shot at Oprah

Terrence Howard, Narcissist

by

Of all the quotes floating around in the soup of crazy talk Terrence Howard ladles out in his recent Elle interview, this one is my favorite:

I like women who look like me. Generally, you’re attracted to women who look like you, because the most beautiful thing in nature is your own reflection.

The best part about this isn’t that he’s implying that he’s so hot, but that it makes his perfect match so obvious.

terrance_pigs.jpg

Why the hell isn’t he with Eva Pigford? They’re practically twin-like in their resemblance. Terrence gave no word on his feelings about incest to Elle, but hey, there’s always next time. [Image credit: Getty]

Related Content
photo_20×928.gifBrowse All Terrence Howard Photos
news_20×920.gifTerrence Howard Actor Page

K-Fed Makes His Move for the Kids

by

kfed080907.jpgEven though their divorce was just settled and custody split 50-50 between Britney and Kevin, the former backup dancer filed papers yesterday for primary custody of the couple’s two sons. A source revealed that Federline has been worried that Brit’s wacky behavior exposes the babies to “unnecessary risk.” Okay, technically a topless pool makeout sesh doesn’t directly harm their kids, but we see K-Fed’s point. Britney’s kinda lost it, and she’s got the weave to prove it. Spears has not released a statement regarding her ex’s move, but she’d probably say something like, “Huh? Wah? I’m freaking out! No, not because of Kevin trying to get all custodian, but because I can’t find my Marlboro Lights. Seriously though ya’ll , I’m a good mom and a brainiac – that’s gotta count for something!” [People. Image: Getty]

Related Content
news_20×921.gifBritney’s Naked Hot Tub Makeout Session
news_20×921.gifBritney’s Parenting Bashed by Mags
news_20×921.gifBrit and K-Fed: Snoopin’ on Each Other
news_20×921.gifK-Fed’s Ex Not Preggers, Offers Pregnancy Test as Proof