It all started with some ratty extensions…
…and it only got worse from there. Is this the VMAs or a Rob Zombie movie?
Still too hard to tell.
Britney’s trainwreck more or less set the tone for the rest of last night’s show, which was supposed to be a new-and-improved version of the Video Music Awards. Mostly, it just felt schizophrenic, with its performers scattered through a series of “parties” at the Palms Hotel in Las Vegas. Though less ceremonious in general (gone away, for the most part, were performer introductions, thankfully) and about as short as you could possibly expect an awards show to be (just over two hours, double thankfully), this year’s VMAs was a series of quick cuts and excerpted performances. It felt like a parody of MTV and the short-attention-span generation the network supposedly spawned. The awards show is what would happen if ADHD got ADHD. (And what’s worse — they gypped us out of what was undoubtedly the best part of the night: the Kid Rock-Tommy Lee tussle.)
After the jump, we recount some highlights. And by “highlights,” more times than not, we mean “lowlights.”
Britney wasn’t the only one bombing this weekend. On Saturday Foxy Brown received a year-long prison sentence for violating her probation a bunch of times. The rapper – who is allegedly three months pregnant – apparently burst after hearing her latest sentence. “I’m willing to do whatever I need to do to change,” she pleaded with the judge. “I realize that’s not where I want to be. It’s humbled me in ways I never imagined.”
Well, jail will probably humble you further Foxy! Even the judge didn’t buy her tears, calling the rapper “a great actress” for her court performance. She should seriously look into doing a couple movies when she gets out of the slammer – in 363 days. [E Online. Image: Getty]
Foxy and Her Weave Come Undone in Jail
Pregnant Foxy Thrown in Jail
Foxy Gets Pregnant, Engaged & Arrested
Mischa’s Nonexistent Nipple Slip
The O.C. star’s rep says claims of a nipple slip are untrue because no photographic evidence exists. Knowing Mischa and her flashing ways, we believe it without any proof. [NYP]
Rihanna and JT Snag VMA Awards
Amidst all the fights and flops, these two stars pocketed a couple Moon Men each for actually having a little talent. You paying attention, Brit? [People]
Lindsay Looks Hot in Rehab
While her celeb pals partied in Vegas, LiLo looked adorable hanging with her new rehab buddies in Utah. Blink and you might confuse her for a normal 21-year old. [X17]
Paris Blows Xtina’s Baby Secret
The ditzy heiress revealed to the crowd at a Vegas bash that the Xtina’s knocked up, even though she has yet to confirm that she’s with child. Paris called her “the most beautiful pregnant woman in the world.” Think Nicole’s a little bit hurt? [Us Weekly]
Amy Winehouse’s Money Hungry Dad
The singer’s pop is trying to snag her money in order to prevent Amy (or her skeezy husband) from blowing it on drugs. Maybe he should try to take her cocaine away from her first? [Mollygood]
Apparently after going through one deadbeat husband, two kids, three rehab facilities and a whole lot of shaved hair, our pop princess has completely forgotten what once made her great – a hot bod, bangin’ dance moves, and some serious lip-syncing skills. Britney Spears opened MTV’s Video Music Awards tonight with her new song “Gimme More,” and damn, she was effing horrible. It was as if she went to sleep in a sparkly bikini and hooker boots and only woke up when her assistant shoved her on-stage to do her routine. If Brit’s gonna to pretend to have a comeback, she could have at least chugged a few Red Bulls beforehand. Anything to give her a little energy while she stands around lifeless and forgets the lyrics to her new song. Maybe she should have rehearsed more. We were rooting for Brit, but after this mess we’ll pass the next time she tries to give us more.
Examine the pics of her “comeback” and tell us – what do you think of Britney’s big performance?
Browse All Britney Spears Photos
Britney’s Kids Have Rotting Teeth
Britney’s Nutty, Naked Photoshoot
Britney’s Naked Hot Tub Makeout Session
Here’s a partial transcipt of the elimination scene of this week’s episode:
Bret: “Brandi, do you want to stay in this house with me?
Brandi: “Honestly, I don’t think I can bring my guard down.”
Bret: “You made this decision by yourself and your tour ends here.”
Brandi later explains, “I didn’t mean for him to think that I didn’t care. And it sucks, it hurts, it kills me that he misunderstood me.”
Did Bret have a choice in which girl to eliminate this week? Did Brandi ask to go home? Or was she misunderstood. Weigh in now and check back soon for our official recap.
The Hova was asked recently if he was planning on marrying his gal pal Beyoncé, and his response was “One day soon — let’s leave it at that.” But of course, we can’t just leave it at that. How soon could he possibly mean?
- When Beyoncé stops falling on her ass onstage?
- When the original members of Destiny’s Child reunite?
- When Kanye West and 50 Cent record an album together?
- When Jay-Z asks Nas to be his Best Man?
- When Lindsay Lohan is sober?
We get it J. As soon as never. We’ll save the date. [Us Weekly. Image: Getty]
Beyonce’s Booby Flash
VIBE Awards: You Choose The Winners!
Joe W. and his fancy pierced ears made a lot of pick-up progress, but it wasn’t enough for Mystery and his Wing Men to keep him around another week. The guys are now comfortable kissing peaches and hanging in Speedos, but will that be enough to keep a seat in the house?
Who do you think has mastered all the right moves?
And who doesn’t have enough kino to stick around?
Send tips to your fallen brothers.
Episode 5 Recap
‘The Pick Up Artist’ Show Info
Browse Show Photos
Fortunately for us, what happens in Vegas doesn’t stay there. On Sunday night, MTV will broadcast the 2007 Video Music Awards live from the Palms Casino, with absolutely scorching performances from this year’s hottest artists. Will Britney‘s performance be a disaster? Will the 50 and Kanye beef erupt at the show? Will Akon dry-hump someone on stage? Get answers to these pop culture conundrums on Sunday night at 9 p.m., and check back after to see our coverage of the show.
Not sure who’s performing? Check out shots of stars scheduled to appear, and their videos.
Browse All 2007 MTV VMA Performer and Presenters
Watch Music Videos By The Performers and Presenters