Maybe it’s just his attraction spells working on us, but after Episode 3 we’ve crowned the adorably droopy Joe D. our Pick Up Artist of the Week. The chubby shy guy wowed the four-year olds in the Reward Challenge with his passionate storytelling and was robbed of the win by the pandering, manipulative Pradeep. He also impressed us with his attractions skills at the bar, using tattoo talk to work the ladies. Joe W. may have won the challenge, but Joe D. won our hearts. He can demonstrate his high value on us any day.Find out what happened with the rest of the lovable nerd herd after the jump!
Pretty, pretty Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger stopped by MTV studios to tape TRL on Wednesday and she had a series of facial expressions in tow. Unfortunately none of them were smiles. Seriously: check out the gallery below for today’s dose of misery. The closest she comes is floppy-mouthed toothy thing, but I’m pretty sure she’s just scratching her bottom lip with her top teeth. Sad. She’s totally crying on the inside. Now she knows how we felt when Asia won.
[All images: Getty]
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- Is Paris Hilton sporting a paunch? She’s probably just jealous of Nicole Richie‘s baby bump. Copycat! [CityRag]
- Star Jones gets photographed looking…not bad. Of course, Star Jones’ “not bad” is anyone else’s “does not burn out your corneas upon a single glance,” so that’s probably not saying very much. [Dlisted]
- Sporty Spice reportedly bans her reunited group-mates from drinking on their upcoming tour. Good luck getting through that one, you masochist. [Seriously? OMG! WTF?]
- Beyoncé‘s mother, Tina Knowles, unveils a clothing line described as “a taste of couture.” Couture, shredded lamé, hookers, burps…it all tastes the same, really. [CONCRETELOOP]
- Bobby Brown wears a T-shirt to a Miami club that reads: “I May Not Be Mr. Right, But I’ll F*** You ‘Til He Shows Up.” A more succinct picture of the last 15 years of Whitney Houston‘s life would be impossible to find. [Sandra Rose]
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Nicole’s Baby Bump is a Boy
The Kanye West and 50 Cent album-release rivalry has taken a twangy turn: country music’s Kenny Chesney is also set to release an album on Sept. 11. Arrggh! No really: arrggh — the name of Kenny’s disc is Just Who I Am: Poets and Pirates. Anyway, Kenny’s following the suit of his release-date counterparts by talking some smack. It’s in his genteel manner, but still: smack. Says Kenny:
“It’s funny how with every record that comes out, we’re aware of the urban [competition], and none of those acts acknowledge that I exist. Until I have that No. 1 debut on the Top 200.“
Awww. Poor maligned and forgotten country-music superstar. So this is why every cowboy sings his sad, sad song! Anyway, another crap-talker in the pot is another crap-talker I’m not rooting for. Ani DiFranco for the win! [Entertainment Weekly / Images: Getty]
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Sometimes, famous people aren’t above the law. Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michal Vick has decided to plead guilty to charges of dogfighting, after his co-defendants in the case accepted plea bargains and evidence against the quick-footed star continued to mount. His attorney read a statement on behalf of the player that stated:
“Mr. Vick has agreed to enter a plea of guilty to those charges and to accept full responsibility for his actions and the mistakes he has made. Michael wishes to apologize again to everyone who has been hurt by this matter.”
You mean like the numerous dogs that were murdered at Vick’s “kennel” for being crappy fighters? I’m sure they accept the apology! Vick faces a $250,000 fine and up to five years in prison, though he will probably be sentenced with less. It’s kinda of funny that Vick and his pals chose to name their operation “Bad Newz Kennels,” ‘cuz now that’s all their getting. Karma sure is a bitch – and yes, we’re talking about a female dog. [ESPN. Image: Getty]
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In this episode, this happens:
If you are looking for anything else in TV or in the realm of human behavior, you’re aiming far too high. Be prepared for a lifetime of disappointment.
Donald Trump knows the secret to getting people to do what he wants – insulting the s**t out of them. At least that’s what he did recently to Paris, Britney and Lindsay, so we’ll have to wait and see if his plan works. The millionaire claims that he is in negotiations with Britney to appear on Celebrity Apprentice and that Paris Hilton also “wants to be on” the show. He says, “We’re negotiating with Britney right now. Can you imagine her doing it? We’re not sure what will happen. She’s a [bleep]ing mess. And that little reality show she had did nothing. But she likes the idea of being on television and I think she’d be great.”
Damn! Strong words there, DT. The combover king also has a thing for Lindsay Lohan and is in the process of sweet talking her into appearing on the show. He says of the rehabbing actress: “Another [bleep]ing mess. We haven’t asked her yet, but I’m going to call her this week. It would a positive thing for her to do . . . for all of them.”
And if there’s anyone who knows positive, it’s the Donald! Just look at the language he uses. Hopefully he’ll fix his hairdo before this new version of the Apprentice airs. After all, it’s a f***ing mess too. [NY Post. image: Getty]
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