Jonesing for music on your television set? You’ve come to the right place, rockers! Check out our shortlist below. For more extensive listings, read VH1’s Rock on TV schedule daily.
The Italian Job, 5 p.m. (EST), FX: Marky Mark Wahlberg stars in this hyper-extended Mini-Cooper commercial, which, as it turns out, was actually a remake. The movie’s about about Vince Chase . . . er, Marky Mark, sorry, as he seeks revenge against the evil Ed Norton for killing Donald Sutherland. Mos Def shows up, too. The movie’s based on the 1969 Michael Caine vehicle of the same name. It’s really good, so long as you’re trapped on a plane and can’t move for like eight hours. Jet Blue wins again! (Sidebar: There’s a sequel coming. Can’t wait for ’09, kids.)
Three Kings, 7:30 p.m. (EST), FX: It’s Marky Mark night on FX, apparently, because this David O. Russell film follows the Mini-Cooper spot above. The flick stars Ice Cube, George Clooney and Spike Jonze (the Beastie Boys’ video director who you might remember from Being John Malkovich) as soldiers in Iraq, arguing over buried treasure. This is one of the best films of the ’90s, and if you haven’t seen it, we recommend you do. You’ll be happier for it.
Ne-Yo‘s going up against R. Kelly, and Rihanna‘s hoping to knock out Beyonce with her “Umbrella” — at the VIBE Awards, that is. You have the power to decide who wins! VH1 Soul and VIBE magazine have gotten together to broadcast the awards ceremony, selecting from this year’s stellar artists, amazing albums and hit singles the candidates for Hip-Hop Artist of the Year, Breakthrough Artist, and the Song of the Year, among other categories. You, however, will choose the winners, by voting here. Will Timbaland outshine Swizz Beatz for the honor of Producer of the Year? Will Amy “Anti-Rehab” Winehouse send blue-eyed soul singer Robin Thicke packing? Vote now and tune in November 14th when the Caramel Bombshell Eve hosts the show and reveals the winners.
What can you say about Brit’s newly leaked songs? They’re breathy, boppy, and sound EXACTLY the same. BORING! The lyrics all kind of blend into one, but from what we can gather her new ditties are all about grinding, boys, coming back, getting high, boys, the temperature rising, and jumping and moving – possibly with boys. It’s unfortunate that Brit didn’t instead use her own drama to inspire her new jams. Cheeto Crumbs on the Floor of My Mercedes and God Damn It Sean Stop Crying Or Mommy’s Gonna Beat Your Ass are tunes we could really get down to on the dance floor.
Check out Brit’s newest songs here and here.
Are you dancing or snoozing? [Image: Getty]
Britney Drops Two New Tracks, Ya’ll
“Umbrella” Could Have Been Brit’s Song
Browse Britney Spears Photos
Thank goodness – we were just starting to get bored staring at Nicole Richie‘s baby bump. Now we have a whole new belly to behold! Apparently the producers of Halle’s new film Tulia had to bail on plans to start shooting in October because the Oscar winner is three months preggers. Check out this pic of the starlet taken last month (with that Ty Pennington dude) – she’s gotta be hiding something under that flowy dress. Take a look and let us know what you think – is Halle Berry knocked up or are we just hungry for a new celebubaby to obsess over? [TMZ. Image: Getty]
Let’s say you’re a crazy rich basketball player and you want to show some dinky poker champ how balls to the wall rich you are. Would you:
A) Buy five $1,400 bottles of Cristal
B) Buy fifteen bottles of $1,400 Cristal
C) Buy fifteen bottles of $1,400 Cristal and then leave the club with a $21,000 bill
D) All of the above
Check D) my friends, cuz that’s exactly what Kobe Bryant did this weekend. After poker player Antonio “The Magician” Esfandiari laid down the big bucks for two bottles of $1,400 Cristal champagne, Kobe attempted to outshine the card shark and upped the tab to five bottles. The Magician then raised him ten, and the Lakers star came back with an order of fifteen bottles of the pricey booze. He then paid his $21,000 bill and split before even having one sweet sip – of champagne or of victory. Now we kind of get why that wife is still by his side – we’d stick around too if our man was constantly ready to drop some bills to show off. Who cares if he’s constantly involved in some scandal when you can have whole new wardrobe in five minutes! [TMZ. Image: Getty]
Kobe Bryant Denies Divorce Rumors
Kobe Wants Out of Lakerville
Things sure got ugly on this week’s episode of The Hills. Spencer dumped Brody and grew a goatee, Heidi and Jen Bunney bickered about Lauren, Justin Bobby continued to rip out Audrina’s heart while talkin’ nonsense, and Whitney appeared onscreen for two seconds to make THIS face. Ugly, indeed!
Tensions in the band flare as Rainbow’s ego outgrows the band’s success, and the band’s inability to get a deal proves a constant source of frustration for Cisco. After a particularly difficult show, Cisco slices into Rainbow, giving him some “constructive criticism” that doesn’t sound the least bit constructive. “This ain’t a party,” Cisco says, which is fairly ironic, considering that the past several episodes have looked very much like a party.
Fame is a cruel mistress, but the anticipation of fame can be a real deal-breaker. When Bryan‘s wife Kim came to visit the Man Band house, she found herself surrounded by the 14 beautiful female dancers the men were auditioning for their performance at Miami nightclub Mansion. Despite how fit, toned and tanned everyone appeared, it wasn’t pretty. Kim’s jealousy manifested in a massive load of guilt for Bryan. The fewer clothes on the back-up dancers, the more guilt for our beleaguered Man Bander.
Uber-blogger Perez Hilton is bringing his sass, style and celebrity dirt to VH1 in a new special What Perez Sez…About the VMAs, premiering on Tuesday, September 11th at 9PM. Tune in to find out what the “Queen of All Media” has to say about the MTV Video Music Awards and the hoopla that surrounds the show. Perez will address the night’s best outfits, antics and performances – from the stars who rocked it to the celebs who should have stayed home. Only on VH1!
What Perez Sez About the VMAs Main Page
What Perez Sez Photo Hunt Game
Browse Perez Hilton Photos