Country Idols: Phil Flies, Sanj Sucks

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Last night’s theme was country music, with Martina McBride mentoring the silly seven. Hard to say who’s getting heaved this evening. Phil Stacey has been hovering around the bottom for the past three weeks, so I thought he’d get the boot, but the dude really nailed his Keith Urban cover. Of course, Americans were raised to distrust Lex Luther. And many of us are probably offended by walking penises. Phil looks like both, and that might be hurting his chances for remaining another week. Hasn’t he learned anything from Sanjaya? Hair is important!

And then there’s Sanj himself. You’ve got to hand it to him for being self-aware with his song choice, Bonnie Raitt’s "Something to Talk About." But you also have to hand it to Simon for calling him out on not having any talent, rather than just politely smiling and saying stuff like, "You do you, dawg."

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What You Didn’t See on the I Love New York Reunion

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Below are two VSPOT extras chock full of stuff that didn’t make the cut of the I Love New York reunion. The first is a highlights reel of New York delivering the smackdown to virtually everyone who crosses her path. Most notable is the previously unseen footage of her onstage rumble with Romance. Giving him her patented derriere salute, she tells him, "Talk to the ass, bitch." It’s a shame this didn’t make it to air, for it signifies a progression in her ass gesturing. This time it’s verbal!

The second clip features alternate footage of Tango’s cancellation of his proposal with New York. Watch as New York’s breakdown hits a fever pitch. Listen as her voice hits pitches it never has before. Gasp at her attempt to get her hands on Tango to rough him up. Snicker as T-Bone steals some camera time with his unsolicited on-stage consolation of New York.

Since we were on set of the reunion, we can fill you in on something extra that went down that didn’t even make it to the VSPOT footage: when New York cried repeatedly that she should have picked Chance, she made frequent references to his manhood. Seems Chance is packing what New York describes as "a python," as opposed to Tango’s "two-inch d***." Compare and contrast: it’s the New York way.

For even more unaired footage, hit VSPOT. And for a few extra tidbits of footage you can’t see anywhere along with the answers to last week’s quote quiz, follow the jump… 

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“Laff At ‘Em” Features Jay, T and JT

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070417_timba_jayz Timbaland and Jay-Z are back together again. Unfortunately, they’re laying on the cutting-room floor.

Evidently, the dream duo that put together insta-classics like "Big Pimpin’" and "Hola’ Hovito" united in the studio during the sessions for Timba’s new Shock Value and dropped "Laff At ‘Em," a hella hot remix of Timba’s current smash hit "Give It to Me" that didn’t make it on to the record. You can listen to it here. I did. Then I listened again. And again. And again …

Oh yeah, I almost forgot … Justin Timberlake kicks the chorus. Try not listening now.

In other news, Timba’s going to hit the studio for the new Mario … blah, blah, blah … Just go Laff at ‘Em, son.

Best of Blogville – Tobey and Kirsten’s Pain

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Tobey_kirsten_links_2- Toby Maguire and Kirsten Dunst look unhappy at Spider-Man 3 premiere. My after-three-movies-I- can-no-longer-stand-the-sight-of-you sense is tingling. [Dlisted]

- Jessica Simpson‘s breast is dying to get out. Of course it is. It can’t wait to give her career mouth-to-nipple. [Egotastic!]

- Forrest Whitaker‘s Hollywood star shines. In his eye, no doubt. [Crunk + Disorderly]

- A tongue-in-cheek action figure of Quentin Tarantino’s Grindhouse character is released. Now in addition to ignoring the movie, America can ignore the merchandise, too! [Best Week Ever]

- Tyra Banks, Beyoncé, Kimora Lee and model Jessica White take in the Knicks. They are the 21st century’s synthetic answer to the Hair Bear Bunch. Help! [CONCRETELOOP]

Chatty Halle

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Halle Berry has revealed that she has sought refuge from the burdens of fame in the virtual security blanket that is the Internet. "I have gone online before in search of anonymity and an attempt to leave celebrity out of it and just have a normal chat," says the actress who’s dabbled in chat rooms. After the jump, we hypothesize how one of these chat sessions might have gone down.

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Lily Allen Low on Gas

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Lillyallen British firebrand and neo-ska star Lily Allen has cancelled most of her current American tour. According to a post on her MySpace page, she’s not really feeling it: “I am tired, but, more than that, I don’t think I have been giving my best performances recently. I have been getting really drunk because I’ve been so nervous about doing bad shows, and I don’t want people spending money on going to see a show that isn’t the best it could be.” Die-hards will still be able to see Allen perform at a few dates, Coachella and Bonnaroo among them, but her tour’s been truncated. In not-unrelated news, other burgeoning British female artists Lady Sovereign and Amy Winehouse have each had problems with live appearances lately: the former cancelling her U.K. tour because of exhaustion, the latter cancelling selected dates in various countries for a variety of reasons, poor girl. What’s up, Brits? Too much touring? Or too much infighting?

Sanjaya’s Sadness, Schedule and Sister

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Cute and whimsical or irritating and feeble? Where do you stand on Sanjaya? The most visible American Idol contestant is earning himself a bit of a backlash these days. On the night before he croons some twang-tinged thingee under the tutelege of Martina McBride, Mr. Malakar finds himself being deemed Maxim’s "Girl of the Day." (The mag refers to him as "Sanjina" — ouch). And evidently a stadium full of Dodgers fans opened up a giant can whup-ass on him when his puss recently appeared on the Jumbo-tron; getting booed never feels nice. Can’t see why they’re down on him — dude works his butt off. TMZ recently posted the schedule for the show’s wanna-bes; with all that planning and rehearsal I wonder why he doesn’t sound better?

Oh well, America can always oogle his sister. Her shapely figure has been getting some play of late. Wonder if the show would ever consider a duet?

Bryan Ferry Praises Nazis, Realizes Mistake, Apologizes

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Taking a page from the playbooks of Joy Division and David Bowie, former Roxy Music singer Bryan Ferry praised Nazis in an interview to publicize his new record Dylanesque, due out June 19. Ferry told German publication Welt am Sonntag he found the aesthetics of Nazi Germany "amazing" and calls his London recording studio "the Fuhrerbunker." "My God, the Nazis knew how to put themselves in the limelight and present themselves," Ferry said. Several Jewish organizations were outraged by the remarks, forcing Ferry to retract them. "I apologize unreservedly for any offense caused by my comments on Nazi iconography, which were solely made from an art history perspective."

Does this affect whether you’d buy Bryan Ferry’s albums?

Tuesday: Kate Moss Gets Nude While Brit Covers Up

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Brit_2__150x Brit Axes Manager In Comeback Attempt
She blamed her manager for introducing her to party queen Paris Hilton, and now she seems to be trading in the clubs for the studio and dance classes. 

J.Lo and Anthony Sue Over Drug Scandal
The National Enquirer claims the couple was caught up in a heroin scandal. No-nonsense J. Lo wants six figures and a retraction.

Vanessa Minnillo & Nick Lachey: Newlyweds, Part 2?
The New Yorker is becoming bicoastal by moving into Lachey’s Beverly Hills home. Would he dare do another reality show?

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Best of Blogville – Jacko’s Gang

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Mj_links- Michael Jackson‘s parenting skills are praised. That’s probably a veiled compliment. [A Socialite's Life]

- Madonna tours Africa and takes time out to pick some corn. How common of her. [Dlisted]

- Eva Longoria was wrapped in toilet paper at her bridal shower. She looks like a desperate hemorrhoid. [I'm Not Obsessed]

- Is that a weave, or are snakes descending upon Beyoncé‘s head? Or is it both? [IDontLikeYouInThatWay.com]

- Linsday Lohan gay rumors swirl. You know what they say: you haven’t made it until you’ve promoted Proactiv, gone through rehab and been called gay. In that order. Welcome to superstardom, Linds! [Egotastic!]