Exclusive Interview: Making Babies With Janet Jackson

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Janet Jackson’s forthcoming album Discipline (out Feb. 26) is full of thumping club tracks, but since Valentine’s Day is upon us, we thought we’d slow it down for our exclusive chat with the diva. Below, we grill Janet on the slow and sexy jams (or, as they’re often referred to, baby-making songs) of her career, from the song that created the mold (“Funny How Time Flies (When You’re Having Fun)” from 1986′s Control), to the steamy title track of her new album. Nothing was off limits, both musically (album cuts, b-sides and chart smashes are all covered) and topically (since Janet’s baby-making songs tend to cover the subject of, well, making babies rather thoroughly). Things start to heat up down below…

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Britney Teaches Tots How to Grind

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We’re not quite sure how this happened or who allowed it, but Britney Spears, fully decked out in fishnets, boots and not much else, led a group of little kids in an hour-long dance class yesterday at Millenium Dance Complex. Brit was there to rehearse moves for her upcoming music video, but somehow wound up teaching the tots, ages 4-7, moves to old school Madonna songs. But don’t go thinking she was having them hump the floor! The director of the dance complex reveals that she, “even played age-appropriate games in a circle, pretending to be a choo-choo train. Britney was just amazing with the kids and everyone ended up having a blast. At the end of the hour class, all the kids hugged Britney and she seemed very happy.”

We can’t help but let our heart strings be tugged a little. It’s the first time in months that Britney’s done something sweet (though still a little weird), and surely she’s missing her own sons. The starlet had so much fun teaching the kids that she may even turn the class into a weekly gig – which would be the most consistent thing she’s done in years. If this is true, we totally approve of parents forcing dance classes on their kids, just to bask in the Britney, er, glow. [Us/People]

Lindsay & Paris Battle For Timbaland’s Love

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Well look what we have here! It’s the world’s dumbest – and most dysfunctional – love triangle! Poor Timbaland has found himself trapped between two dueling dimwits – Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton. Both the girls are desperate to give their music “careers” another try, and the divas duked it out at the super-producer’s pre-Grammy party for his attention. Each was also horrifed that the other was in attendance, with Lindsay allegedly declaring, “What the hell is that b*tch doing here?” when she saw the heiress. Paris’ response? “F*ck off, you b*tch.”

Wow. Those words are gonna sound even more amazing when sung and put to music! A source reveals that both of the women “want to work with Timbaland to revive their faltering music careers,” and had seen this party as away to get him on their side. Lindsay already has Ne-Yo on board, which seems to signify that she’s serious about singing. Paris, on the other hand? She’s probably just trying to get closer to Justin Timberlake. [MSNBC]

Rock of Love: Rockstar Moments

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In the past, we’ve seen our Rock of Love hero Bret Michaels in all sorts of sticky situations. Primarily, these involve nudity. For instance, there was the time he almost shut down the Forty Deuce. Then there was the time he was given a pole-dance by his potential paramours. This time, Bret’s the recipient of some witty dialogue, which has something to do with keeping his pipes clean. There’s some double entendre going on there. Is it rock star-worthy? We don’t know. But it’s definitely Bret.

Tuesday: Nicole Ditches Baby for LA Bashes

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nicolerichie0212.jpgFergie Plans Shotgun Wedding
What’s she gonna do with her lovely baby bumps? Walk down the aisle asap so no one notices that she’s preggers. [NY Post]

Nicole Can’t Stop Post-Baby Partying
You’d get out of the house too after lugging a baby around for 9 months. Mom power! [Us]

Paris Loses Her Pussy
Don’t get your hopes up – we’re talking about her cat. She left it at the vet and hasn’t picked it up in weeks, so it’s going back to a shelter. [TMZ]

Brit’s BFF Sam Tried to Take her Cash
Note to Britney – that’s what people who randomly come into your life when you’re vulnerable really want. [Us]

Natalie Cole Bashes Winehouse’s Win

The aging diva thinks Amy shouldn’t have won a Grammy (or five) until she’s sober. If the Grammys followed this rule, no one in the biz would ever win anything (um, including Natalie?).

DVD Debut: Gumshoe Hunts For Girl

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New DVDs are released every Tuesday, which leads us to the eternal question: What should you buy? Our critic Charles Bottomley weighs in on every week’s must-haves and please-forgets.

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Gone Baby Gone
Casey Affleck is the Boston gumshoe hired to find a missing girl in this thoughtful thriller from novelist Dennis Lehane and director Ben Affleck. Lehane also wrote Mystic River, and the Afflecks strain for the same kind of dramatic intensity. The mark is missed, but blue-collar Boston is neatly realized, and the Oscar-nominated Casey has the smoldering intensity of a major star in the making.

Extras: Ben Affleck’s commentary provides insight into the challenges facing a first-time director, while the featurettes turn their attention to an often overlooked aspect of filmmaking — casting.

Rating: Buy!

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