Usher Dishes On Dumping His Momager

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So Usher wants you all to know that he certainly did NOT fire his mama/manager Jonetta Patton, and it most definitely was not because his wife Tameka didn’t want her around. In an interview with Vibe, Usher set the story straight: “I decided to not fire, not get rid of, but to give [my mother] the ultimate compliment — to retire her to be a full-time grandmother.” He added, “My mother and I decided to change her situation, together. There was a conversation. I didn’t write her a letter or pink slip her.”

This still sounds fishy to us – we’re calling cover up! He of course then went on to gush over his lady love, saying, “The swagger I possess now definitely comes from my wife. And my son completes me. He changes my perspective on what life is, and what matters.”

Blah blah blah. When did Usher get so peaceful and zen? We want some drama, but no way does Tameka let her man go there.

Kardashian Kid Dresses Sexy Like Sis

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I normally like to avoid talking about kids and their fashion flaws – my puberty was filled with so many awkward experiences caught on film that I can still empathize with tweens’ fashion mishaps. But when I stumbled across this pic of Kim Kardashian‘s adorable little sister Kylie graduating 5th grade in a minidress (which we’d wear) and what appear to be 3-inch heels, I was kinda surprised, though not shocked. Afterall she’s probably just imitating what she knows: her skanky sisters. This is not to say that Kylie didn’t look hot – she did! But hot should never be used to describe a 5th grader. EVER. We’re sure Kim and the other sisters are fabulous mentors (Kim doesn’t drink, and we’re not going to say anything about the Tape That Must Not Be Named). But perhaps they should save their styling tips for Kylie’s 16th birthday and let her dress just like her graduating peers – frumpy, goofy and like a kid.

See above for Abigail Breslin‘s outfit from Tuesday night for preteen fashion inspiration, and for more Kartrashiness, check out the pics below.

Tila Tequila Helped Gay Marriage??

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Someone needs to tell Tila Tequila that making out with some chicks on national TV is not activism, it’s soft core porn. For some reason, our horny heroine thinks that she is responsible for the movement to legalize gay marriage. “It is because of me — I definitely think [my show] has helped the movement,” she bragged recently. “Before it came out, everyone was still a little apprehensive about [same sex relationships]. Then they realized, ‘Wow, everyone is really into this stuff, and it is fine.’ The next thing you know, [gay marriage] is legal.”

It’s so sweet that she thinks that having both men and women eat pig vaginas together in slutty bathing suits somehow helped to change the world. Awwww. Stupidity is so precious! So what’s next for Tila? “I am going to Africa,” she told Us magazine. “I think maybe I will fall in love in Africa.”

Just like we’ll fall in love with not having her hear from this airhead for a few months. Bon Voyage!

50 Cent Demands Rent on Ruined House

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It would really suck to be 50 Cent‘s baby mama. One minute you’re fleeing your house as it’s engulfed in flames, and the next minute you’re being forced to pay rent on the leftover ashes. A judge has forced Shaniqua Tompkins to pay $4500 in unpaid rent on the ruined mansion. The former couple is locked in a legal battle over a breach of contract suit, and when the judge learned that Tompkins has refused to pay rent since May, she demanded: “She better pay it by the end of the week. Do you understand?”

Fiddy’s ex tried to win over the court’s sympathy, stating that “We lost everything. All we have is the clothes we jumped out of the window with.” But after learning that she was getting $6,700 – which includes money to rent a new place – the judge ruled with the uber-rich rapper.

Even though this pic of 50 with the Kartrashian sisters has nothing to do with this story, we had to post it anyway. BFFs!

Madonna’s Bro Rats Her Out for Cash

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The reigning queen of pop’s brother is ready to sell out his sister for some cold hard dough. Madonna‘s brother Christopher Ciccone is working with a British writer on a tell-all that’s been described as “extremely graphic and devastating.” Chris, who is gay, used to be M’s right-hand man, but she dropped him after hooking up with Guy Ritchie, who’s been described as “uncomfortable around queens” by Madge pal Rupert Everett. The book’s due out next month, so we hope Madonna does something ridiculous to draw attention away from the tell-all. Maybe she could adopt a 20-something blogger from NYC and bring her to live with Lourdes, Rocco and lil’ David in London? [NYP]

Gossip Break: Usher’s Got a Wandering Eye

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Mel and Brit Brit have a BFF dinner sesh in Beverly Hills. Is she starring in Braveheart 2? [DListed]

Donald Trump may be loaded, but he can’t afford proper hair. Karma rules! [Seriously? OMG!]

Mariah Carey is ridiculously rich, but she still wants peeps to buy her wedding presents. That’s how divas do it, ya’ll. [Crunk+Disorderly]

Mark Ronson agrees: Limantha is the raddest couple evah. [ICYDK]

Usher has a hard time staying faithful to his wife. Confessions! [ConcreteLoop]

Someone should tell Kate Hudson that no one cares who she is dating. [I'mNotObsessed]

George Clooney Hates Boobs

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We were kinda shocked when the Cloonster dumped random hottie Sarah Larson, because she seemed like a great catch (and only 29!) and enjoyed hanging off his arm and looking pretty 24/7. But George can’t be bothered with the same lady for too long, so off Sarah went into the LA sunset as quickly as she had arrived. But now we’re finally learning why George got rid of her: he hated her fake breasts! Does this make him more or less of a man? The actor was apparently not into Larson’s recent boob job, and while he let her recover from the surgery at his house, he was NOT happy about the whole thing and thus got rid of his girl. Sadly, she didn’t find out until she read it in the tabloids along with the rest of the world. Stars’ girlfriends – they really ARE just like us!

But never fear, Sarah is a celeb now and is ready to show off what made her “famous.” An insider says: “She likes her new body so much that she would consider posing for Playboy. Now that she’s famous, she’d never go back to cocktailing.” Cheers to that!

Kimora’s Got Deep Thoughts on Hating Marriage

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“When you get married, you’re forced to drink the milk long after it’s spoiled,” says entrepreneur/model/single mom/diva/philosopher Kimora Lee Simmons. We have no idea what that means, but surely it’s genius, right? Russell’s ex opened her heart up to Smooth magazine this month, and she of course did her usual “I’m such a down to earth person, I don’t get why everyone thinks I’m some crazy bit-Derek, GET ME SOME ORGANIC PEANUTS AND TURN THEM INTO PEANUT BUTTER WITH YOUR HANDS SO I CAN FEED IT TO MY PARROT!” routine. And hey – we kinda buy it!

“I hear the craziest things, like, ‘She has to have a champagne glass filled within a quarter inch of the lip,” says Ms. Fabulous. “The reality, is I’m a dedicated mother [to daughters Ming Lee, 8, and Aoki Lee, 5] and a very kind, funny and hardworking person. My reality-TV show helps to shed a bit of light, but even that’s glamorized.” So remember folks – every time you spot Kimora decked in diamonds demanding that her staff cater to her every need, she’s just being hardworking!

Like O.J. and MJ, R. Kelly Takes the Fifth

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(The VH1 Blog has solicited Mark Muro of the California law firm Muro & Lampe, Inc. to keep tabs on the R. Kelly child pornography trial.)

The defense rested its case after only two days of testimony. R. Kelly invoked his Fifth Amendment right against self-incrimination, and won’t testify. The jury will be instructed that Kelly’s decision can’t be held against him. But some jurors may nonetheless wonder why an innocent man wouldn’t jump at the chance to defend himself on the stand. Does he have something to hide? Of course, O.J. Simpson, Michael Jackson and a slew of other celebs provide a strong precedent for opting not to testify — and still winning acquittal!

In other news, Judge Gaughan ruled that the jury will be allowed to view the sex tape during deliberation over the objections of Kelly’s attorneys, who argued that the jury may overemphasize one piece of evidence. I’m not surprised that this argument failed since the tape is the primary piece of evidence in this case. The defense’s objections suggest a lack of confidence in its claims that the tape does not show Kelly or the alleged victim. — Mark Muro, Attorney at Law

Closing arguments are set for Thursday. For now, Kelly loses a point for taking the Fifth. Overall Score: Defense: +2; Prosecution: +6

Hulk Hogan Cries About Kids, Life

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Hulk Hogan got all choked up while chatting on CNN last night, discussing his love for God and his shock at how his life has turned out. He also said he believes the accident, which left Nick’s BFF John Graziano comatose, happened for a reason. “This is to make Nick a better person,” he said. “This is to make John a better person.” Clip above.

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