In honor of the Sex and the City movie opening this weekend and the awful frocks its stars have worn in episodes of the hit HBO show, we’ve gathered the best of the worst fashion flops to ruin Hollywood this year. Not everyone can star in the greatest chick flick of our time, but you sure can dress like you’re straight out of the movie!

From the left: Sarah Jessica Parker and pals (Coco, Heidi Montag, Paris Hilton, Katie Holmes, Tyra Banks, Rumer Willis, Jenna Jameson, Anna Wintour) model their poor picks in crap couture.

Get ready to laugh - Jenna Jameson has made the most ridiculous claim ever, stating “I’m following in Angelina’s footsteps!” Now, the washed up, bone-thin porn star is talking about her desire to have a billion kids while not marrying her partner, but who is she kidding? She’ll NEVER really be like our Saint Angelina. Sure she has many things in common with the pregnant star, among them:

• bony arms
• crazy eyes
• ridiculous tattoos
• past drug use
• lesbian tendencies

But what about that whole saving the world thing that Angie so gracefully champions? Surely you could argue that many people have been saved by Jenna’s skills on film, but we’re not buying it. She’ll have to do a little better than that - like maybe covering herself up, for starters (with some haute couture and body fat).

What goes around (or in the case, gets around) comes around, which is why it seems totally appropriate that Jenna Jameson’s ex-hubby, some porn dude name Jay Grdina, is now dating Shanna Moakler! Yes, that Shanna, from Miss USA/Meet the Barkers fame. The new couple met at Shanna’s birthday bash in Vegas and have been inseparable ever since. This would be so sweet if it was all so x-rated. Even though their union is new, they’re already connected through all sorts of dirty Hollywood drama. Jenna, who is now with Ultimate Fighter Tito Ortiz, is also BFF with Shanna’s sworn enemy, Paris Hilton. You may recall Paris got it on with Shanna’s now ex-hubby when the two were separated. If the two ladies dislike each other (fingers crossed!) we’ll surely hear about it soon - they’re both avid MySpace journal-ers with a flare for the, uh, dramatic.

Or so she says! Jenna - in all her crispy tanned glory - took the stage at this weekend’s AVN Awards (honoring the major players in the adult video world) to present the Jenna Jameson Crossover Award, and instead rambled on and on about herself (watch it all in the vid above). She lectures the new girls on the old days, gushes about how she “paved the way” for porn’s new mainstream appeal and continues to talk about her recent stint as tabloid fodder thanks to her divorce, boob drama and lack of body fat. But her biggest announcement of all came when she said: “I will never ever ever spread my legs again in this industry. Ever.”

But don’t freak, Jenna junkies! She’s just not spreading her legs anymore. She didn’t mention any other orifices - so maybe she’s just retired her legs and is gonna let the rest of her body do the work. Also, hasn’t she quit porn like, a gajillion other times? We’re sure this was just the tequila talking. She probably doesn’t even remember her retirement. [DListed]

Check out some of the other amazingly named adult celebs who hit up the AVN Awards in Vegas. We spotted Mary Carey, of Celebrity Rehab fame, on the red carpet!

From left to right: Jenna Jameson, Mary Carey, Daisy Marie, Savanna Samson, Roxy Jezel, Lela Star, Flower Tucci, Jenna Haze, Brian Pumper, Taylor Wane, Shy Love, Teagan Presley, Rhyse & Riley Richards, Brianna Love, Camilla Bing, Summer Cummings, Lanny Barby, Jade Jolie, Sunny Lane, Dave Navarro, Sunset Thomas.

Holy bones. Rubber-skinned porn entrepreneur Jenna Jameson looks like she’s just about completed her transformation from human to extra terrestrial. The mother ship surely must be landing soon to pick her up and zap her to Mars! There’s no other way to explain what the hell is going on with her body (well, we can think of a couple things but we don’t want to start rumors). From what we can tell, Jenna looks like a f*cking mess, and her should bones are practically the sizes of her massive breasts. Someone send a platter of bagels over to Club Jenna stat - if she doesn’t eat them maybe she can use them to form some sort of protective covering for her skeletal frame.

Check out more pics below of Jenna modeling (and backstage) in the Heatherette fashion show this past Monday.

- Kelly Rowland is said to be prepping an expanded rerelease of her slow-selling Ms. Kelly album. It’s always smart to give people more of what they don’t want. [Crunk + Disorderly]

- Katie Holmes isn’t just Tom Cruise’s beard, she’s also his platform. Seriously, he looks taller when he stands next to her. All he needs is for her to be his top hat, and then his dream of being Abraham Lincoln will become reality. [CityRag]

- At this point, the only thing keeping Jenna Jameson from becoming Mick Jagger is two bags of silicone. Let ‘em bleed, Jen. [Best Week Ever]

- Idolator runs down its Top 50 Hottest Hotties of rock…with sexy, not to mention supernatural, results. [Idolator]

- Charm School’s Shay and I Love New York’s Tango present at the Ozone Awards. That they were asked to appear on stage is the real victory. [CONCRETELOOP]

[Image: Getty]

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