Dear little dancing girl who loves to sing the Backstreet Boys in an off-key voice while waving her hands like she just don’t care what rhythm is,

Hey there. We are a lot older than you and therefore smarter by default (and thanks to some mortifying life experiences). Here is some sage advice: turn off the webcam. Place it into a pillowcase, along with your glasses, stripped sweater and computer. Get in your parents’ car (this is totally fine), drive to the closet lake (we’re guessing Erie), steal a boat (again, acceptable in this situation) and drive it out into the middle of the lake. Now dump everything in the water, make sure it falls far away to the bottom, turn around, drive the boat and car home, and never look back.

PS: Watch your language!
PPS: We love you.
[via BWE]

“Now and Then” finds us chatting with artists about the breadth of their careers. They explain their latest video and then comment on one of their classic clips.

In our first installment, we get cozy on the couch with the Backstreet Boys. Their new disc Unbreakable just dropped, so we dug up the dirt behind the making of the video for “Inconsolable.” Then we took a trip down memory lane with their spooktastic video for 1997’s “Everybody (Backstreet’s Back).”

Brian: This was originally supposed to be shot in a city during a solar eclipse, but we translated it to the beach. Everybody’s raving about my house in this video. It’s cool, because it’s right on the beach, but it was all concrete, and so not me. Not my style.

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If you aren’t feeling infuriated enough over the state of the world, you’d be wise to check out “Mad About the Boys,” a story in the new issue of Vanity Fair that details Backstreet Boys and ‘NSync Svengali Lou Pearlman’s all-around inappropriate behavior as a liar, fraud, philanderer, thief and creepy old dude who gets off touching the young boys he mentors. Among the story’s many allegations is that Lou molested an underage Nick Carter, a story Nick’s own mother stops just short of confirming. In its brutal character assault of an already shady character (Lou’s in jail for extorting around $500 million from various investors), the story comes off as nothing but sound, citing that various sources (many anonymous and ranging from his right-hand men to his next door neighbor’s gardener) have independently confirmed writer Bryan Burrough’s allegations.

But now, Lou has hit back, talking exclusively to Radar Online…

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This photo of Lou Pearlman seemed to be begging for a caption, something like “It was awesome!” Or simply, “Boys!” But both of these felt really wrong. In case you aren’t sure who that big old fat dude is, he’s the puppet master behind such boy band phenomenons as The Backstreet Boys and *NSYNC (and their insignificant copycats Take 5 and LFO). The problem is, he not only made these guys, he also maybe molested them. According to a new Vanity Fair article, Pearlman allegedly preyed on his young future stars, and traded sexual favors with promises of boy band stardom. His former assistant said, “I would absolutely say the guy was a sexual predator. All the talent knew what Lou’s game was. Some guys joked about it. I remember [one singer] asking me, ‘Have you let Lou [fellate] you yet?’ ”

Apparently Nick Carter, the youngest Backstreeter, was the main target of Pearlman’s, er…affection. One former BSB member said that Lou was “definitely inappropriate” with the star, and Nick’s own mom revealed, “Certain things happened and it almost destroyed our family. I tried to warn everyone. I tried to warn all the mothers . . . I tried to expose him for what he was years ago.”

Damn. Maybe this explains all of Nick’s sh*tastic life choices thus far. Paris Hilton, the House of Carters TV show, that hair-do - there’s a reason the guy’s so messed up! Pearlman’s currently in jail for bank fraud, so boy bands across the country should feel safe to continue ruining radio with their crappy make out jams. As for Pearlman - Nick Carter’s got big muscles and one crazy brother. We hope one day he can put them to good use. [NY Post]

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