- Lil’ Kim’s new mixtape proclaims her G.O.A.T. (greatest of all time). To that I say: baaaah! [CONCRETELOOP]

- Brad Pitt says he won’t be filming anymore nude scenes. So, he won’t be making a cameo in the forthcoming porno spoof Ocean’s Thirt-Peen, I take it? [Dlisted]

- Beyoncé reportedly stumbled out of a New York restaurant. I don’t think she was drunk; I think she was just dancing. [Sandra Rose]

- Keyshia Cole shows up at 106 & Park wearing, basically, a fur bodysuit. But I’m much more concerned about the animal that’s holding court on her head. [Crunk + Disorderly]

[Image: Getty]


Tags: Beyonce Brad Pitt Lil' Kim Keyshia Cole

- Just when you thought Fergie’s appearance couldn’t get more offensive, she busts out the crimper. She looks Ferg-a-tarded. [Dlisted]

- Keyshia Cole appears topless on the cover of Vibe. So how ’bout that singing career? [Crunk + Disorderly]

- Photoshop helps someone hypothesize what Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes would look like if their features were combined on one face. Awww! So much cuter than Suri. [CityRag]

- Dennis Rodman dresses up for as a woman for Halloween. As if he needed the excuse. [CONCRETELOOP]

- Meanwhile, Diana Ross turns up on a red carpet looking like a clown. No excuse given, no excuse needed. [Seriously? OMG! WTF?]

[Image: Getty]


Tags: Fergie Katie Holmes Tom Cruise Keyshia Cole Diana Ross Dennis Rodman

- Now you can watch Kanye West’s post-VMA’s temper tantrum. Someone get this guy a Moon Man with a nipple attached to pacify him. [Crunk + Disorderly]

- Rosie O’Donnell implies that Barbara Walters should retire. Simultaneously, Rosie implies that she has no idea what she’s talking about. [Dlisted]

- You know that Tom Cruise and Britney Spears suck, but did you know that they suck Starbucks coffee? [CityRag]

- Keyshia Cole reveals that she when she spotted her ex with another girl, she “tried to rip her head off.” Once she gets that veterinary degree, she’ll know how to sew it back on. [CONCRETELOOP]

- The Tyra Show’s move to New York is represented in a Wizard of Oz-inspired montage during the season premiere. Such heart! Such nerve! The only thing Tyra’s missing? A brain. [Jezebel]

[Image: Getty]

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Tags: Britney Spears Kanye West Keyshia Cole Tyra Banks Rosie O'Donnell Barbara Walters Tom Cruise MTV VMAs

If you thought Keyshia Cole wanted to be a singer when she grew up, think again. The maiden of melismatic melodrama tells Sister 2 Sister’s Jamie Foster Brown that she has her sights set on “getting married and having kids and becoming a veterinarian.” How’s that for abrupt and…uh, weird? “If it be the Lord’s will, I will have enough money to open up a veterinary hospital. Then I could just hire doctors to come in and I could go to school,” says Keyshia, who clearly has thought about this a lot. But when will she learn the ins and outs of animals? Why, on her tour bus, of course!

Later, Jamie asks Key what will happen in the event of necessary euthanasia. Here’s what Keyshia says:

“I won’t do that part. I’ll call somebody else in for that. I can’t hurt them. Somebody else just gonna have to do that part. I’ll do surgeries and stuff to save their life, but that’s not hurting them.“

Clearly, the girl has a little more studying to do before we can start referring to her as “Doctor.”

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Tags: Keyshia Cole Music

- Apparently, Mary J. Blige has turned to Sandy Duncan for hair inspiration. Put down the Wheat Thins, girl! They’re going to your head! [CONCRETELOOP]

- Keyshia Cole performs “The Star Spangled Banner” before the NFL opening kickoff. But there are so many runs, you’d swear it was a baseball game. [Crunk + Disorderly]

- Celine Dion’s hair is as big as Beyoncé’s on her upcoming album cover. If her butt is as also big as Beyoncé’s, she’s got a hit on her hands. [Dlisted]

- Fergie and Steven Tyler pose together for a picture. Surprisingly, it is not an ad for Botox. [CityRag]

- It’s New York Fashion Week: do you know where your best costume for today is? [Jezebel]

[Image: Getty]


Tags: Mary J. Blige Fergie Keyshia Cole Celine Dion Steven Tyler

If you think the continued roll-out of chapters in R. Kelly’s “Trapped in the Closet” saga is insane, here’s something that’s crazier than crazy: R. Kelly reportedly plans to hit the road in October. The nutty part? His kiddie-porn trial doesn’t begin till Sept. 17.

R. Kelly’s camp hasn’t confirmed the tour — in fact, it was his supposed tourmate Keyshia Cole who let the news slip in an otherwise unrelated interview. MTV News points out that assuming that the trial lasts a standard four weeks, this gives him little time to rehearse. And, oh yeah, it also assumes he’ll get off innocent. Booking a tour the size that Kells’ will undoubtedly be when you don’t know if the headliner will be in jail or not is about as risky as filming your famous ass having sex with a minor and hoping that it won’t leak. But then, it would seem that Kells is a gambling man. [MTV News via Idolator]

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Tags: R. Kelly Keyshia Cole Music