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Lotsa crazy-azz shizzle goes down when musicians are out on tour. Our “Tales From the Road” feature has our Hip-Hop Honors heroes come clean about some dodgey events. Snoop’s got a good one about him and Dr. Dre trying to get some sexy time with female fans back in the early days of their career. Seems the Doggy’s daddy was involved, too. Guess highjinks are just part of the deal when you’re bouncing ladies around hotel rooms…

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Tags: Dr. Dre•Snoop Dogg•Hip Hop Honors•Music•Video

It all started with some ratty extensions…

…and it only got worse from there. Is this the VMAs or a Rob Zombie movie?

Still too hard to tell.

Britney’s trainwreck more or less set the tone for the rest of last night’s show, which was supposed to be a new-and-improved version of the Video Music Awards. Mostly, it just felt schizophrenic, with its performers scattered through a series of “parties” at the Palms Hotel in Las Vegas. Though less ceremonious in general (gone away, for the most part, were performer introductions, thankfully) and about as short as you could possibly expect an awards show to be (just over two hours, double thankfully), this year’s VMAs was a series of quick cuts and excerpted performances. It felt like a parody of MTV and the short-attention-span generation the network supposedly spawned. The awards show is what would happen if ADHD got ADHD. (And what’s worse — they gypped us out of what was undoubtedly the best part of the night: the Kid Rock-Tommy Lee tussle.)

After the jump, we recount some highlights. And by “highlights,” more times than not, we mean “lowlights.”

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Tags: 50 Cent•Beyonce•Britney Spears•Dr. Dre•Justin Timberlake•Kanye West•Madonna•Mary J. Blige•Nelly Furtado•Pete Wentz•Timbaland•Alicia Keys•Lil' Mama•Gym Class Heroes•Hip Hop•MTV VMAs•Music•Photos

Gangstas and Prankstas
Video: T.I. plays another college, gets capped by another water-filled projectile, offers up another 50 large (Crunk & Disorderly)

Holy Ghost
Ghostface Killah: ‘I’m still struggling … I’m not rich … I’mma start singing for God’ (SOHH)

Moms Is Down
Kanye West’s mother thinks Graduation is his best album ever (VH1)

Nasty, Nas
Video: Kelis has cramps, sniffs husband’s armpit (MissInfo)

R U Ready?
Album art, track list released for R. Kelly’s Double Up (HipHopDX)

Percy Purges Profanities
Master P: ‘Al Sharpton and Oprah Winfrey are absolutely right!’ (XXL)

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Tags: 50 Cent•Dr. Dre•Ghostface Killah•Jay-Z•Kanye West•Kelis•Master P•R. Kelly•T.I.

Cam’ron and Myspace aren’t the only ones breathing down 50 Cent’s neck. Apparently, the hottest names in hip-hop and R&B all want a piece of him, too … as in the MC’s upcoming album, Curtis.

First, the producers: Dr. Dre, Eminem and Timbaland have all laid down tracks on the record, with one of the Dre songs, "Straight to the Bank," (listen here) already at No. 21 on the charts. 50 told BBC Radio’s Tim Westwood that big-name producers Kanye West, Pharrell, Swizz Beatz and Polow Da Don have stopped by the studio to guest-produce some stuff for the disc.

As for star wattage behind the mic, Eminem, Akon, Justin Timberlake, Mary J. Blige, Robin Thicke and Nicole Scherzinger are all slated to guest.

Curtis is scheduled for a June 26 street date. You psyched?

Tags: 50 Cent•Akon•Dr. Dre•Eminem•Justin Timberlake•Kanye West•Mary J. Blige•Nicole Scherzinger•Pharrell•Polow Da Don•Robin Thicke•Swizz Beatz•Timbaland